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DUmmie FUnnies 04-10-06 ("Would the military intervene to save us?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | April 10, 2006 | steve2470, DUmmies, and PJ-Comix

Posted on 04/10/2006 3:57:27 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Congratulations to Dummie steve2370! After over a year of probation, you have finally REDEEMED yourself and came up with an hilarious DUmmie thread again worthy of publication in the DUmmie FUnnies. Yes, DUmmie steve2470, you are back in the spotlight again with your incredibly ENTERTAINING cluelessness. For those of you unfamiliar with DUmmie steve2470, he is the author of two of the FUnniest threads featured in the DUmmie FUnnies. The first of the classic steve2370 threads appeared in the February 21, 2005 DUFU edition titled, Clueless about women, please help me out in which our boy couldn't figure out that his date gave him a complete brushoff. It has to be read to be believed. Then steve2470 followed this up a few days later with Clueless about women, part deux in which he still maintained, against all evidence to the contrary, that he could still score a date with the hot chick. Yes, these threads were both truly FUnnie but then a strange thing happened. Steve2470, despite his public exposure in the DUFUs as a complete shmoe, began to bask in the spotlight. As a result, he began posting increasingly bizarre threads in the hope of being featured again in the DUmmie FUnnies. Unfortunately, his latter posts lacked the natural cluelessness of the first two and I had to tempoararily ban him from any further appearances in the DUmmie FUnnies. However, I see the probationary period has worked out well since steve2570 is BACK with AUTHENTIC cluelessness again with this THREAD naively titled, "Would the military intervene to save us?" The thread has all the classic elements of steve2470's refreshing divorce from reality. So let us now watch DUmmie steve2470 weave his fairy tale military fantasy in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering how many times steve2470 has been shot down by women during his probationary period, is in the [brackets]

Would the military intervene to save us?

[I'm picturing steve2470 as a dewy eyed Snow White singing: "Some Day My Prince Will Come."]

To you CIA/NSA spooks, I'm not advocating violence here, so just relax. Let's just say, theoretically, that nothing stops Bushco and Repugs and the fascism continues to grow. Would anyone with influence in the military try to organize a true coup and take back the country? Or...would we really be SOL in that case ? I sure hope we never get to that point in reality.

[Um...let's see, steve2470. The Left is constantly attacking the military and trying to keep them from setting up recruiting booths on campuses. Not only that, Leftists like Richard Belzer are now ATTACKING the intelligence of military personnel in Iraq with comments that he is more knowledgeable about what is going on over there because "they don't read twenty newspapers a day" like he supposedly does. And yet, despite all this, steve2470, is blinking his eyes and sighing in the hope that the military will illegally overthrow the EVIL Bush Regime and hand power over to the DUmmiecrats so they can more effectively besmirch the military. This is actually a bigger delusion than his belief that he could score with a hot chick. But let us continue now with the steve2470 inspired comedy act with more laugh lines from his fellow DUmmies...]

I think the military would fire on us in the beginning but after awhile, then would say 'what the f*ck?" and would restore America back to Americans!

[More likely the military would say, "GET SOME!" and increase their rate of fire into the DUmmie hordes.]

Were Bushco to try a putsch, the most likely thing would be the military would fight itself. One thing I always thought Tim McVeigh's favorite book, "The Turner Diaries," got right, was that the military would split into the federals and the fascists. Probably nowadays the fascists would win that fight, since RW Christian Dominionism has made such inroads into the professional military, from the service academies on up. There would be a Constitutional crisis. Hard to predict how it would come out. Most probably there would be a move to secede by progressive states in the West and Upper Midwest.

[Methinks you've already seceded from REALITY.]

Actually, I was "hoping" the military would do it without Bush

[Back to steve2470 and his fluttering heart hoping that the military would be so deluded as to accomplish the DUmmie hope of removing Bush from office. Yeah, DUmmie benburch is TOO LAZY to pull himself away from his computer screen to do anything but post rantings about sending a million idiots to Washington for Regime Change but you somehow think the military will carry out the wishes of a bunch of mental cases?]

Thought Your Hypothetical Was Bushco Made the Move If Bushco made the move, don't you think progressive forces in the military (a minority, certainly) would move to check the putsch? I do. They might get crushed by the RW fascist sympathizers in the military, which I believe to be in the strong majority. Of course, there have always been fascists in the U.S. military. (My favorite movie on the subject is "Seven Days in May.")

[From reading your post, I got the impression that your favorite movie is "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest."]

I'm not advocating violence either, I just want to know what the military's protocol is for a government out of control.

[I just want to know what the military's protocol is for a DUmmie Mind out of control.]

Is Christian fundamentalism a significant factor in the high echelons of the military? Is "echelons" the right word? Off the top of my head, I can't think of anything much scarier than Christian Dominionist types at command level.

[Make religious belief a court martial offense (unless it is Muslim belief)!]

i was discussing this with my mom yesterday and I was saying how I dont think Bu$h is going anywhere in 2008. He's gonna suspend the constitution (probably after some catastrophic "torrirsit" attack) and the elections wont take place. These people are simply too cocky. They KNOW they're not going anywhere. Anyway, my mom said that if something like that were to occur, the military would step in a put an end to it. I dont know whether they'd do this or not.

[It's dangerous for a DUmmie to discuss politics with Mommy in his computer Romper Room.]

I can conceive of situations Bushco could engineer that might make it very tricky for the military to intercede in a timely, let alone surgical, fashion. It might take quite sometime for heads at the military to unite on a plan of action, even after, and assuming, they could agree that action needed taking. Meanwhile there might be a lot of pain here and around the world.

[We already know there is a pain in Uranus.]

yes, I agree. And I really dont see them leaving in 2008. Maybe I should be wearing my tinfoil hat, but these guys dont ACT like they're gonna go anywhere. They dont care what we think regarding their destruction of the constitution, etc. Its scary! And they also know that if they are ever thrown out, they're probably going to jail. I dont think we're taking anything back in November either. The voting is totally fixed. These ppl are here to stay. And the american ppl have NO recourse.

[Attention DUmmies! Resistance is FUTILE! Voting will do you NO GOOD! Please assume the Fetal Position with thumb tucked firmly in mouth and await further orders!]

Hypothetical: Troops take over White House, hand power to ... a joint Dem/Repug. task force. Not the entire country.

[Hypothetical: Veil of delusion drops from DUmmie steve2470's eyes and he briefly sees REALITY for what it is. The shock could overload your nervous system.]

I think your hypothetical scenario could only work......... If action was taken absolutely immediately by a very limited number of very ballsy military leaders acting on their own initiative. But it would have to happen almost instantly after B* did something unequivocal in terms of seizing dictatorial power. I mean instantly. Over and done before anyone else could react or decide which side to take. Maybe they could render him to Syria.

[Maybe they could render the fat cells in your brain to soap.]

Brainwashed GIs. Most in the military hate libruls and the media. Most watch only FAUXNEWZ and listen only to Der Ruschkopf. We wouldn't stand a chance.

[Is that you, Richard Belzer?]

they are too cowardly to defend the constitution. That's why they've not defended it from bush when he crossed obvious constitutional controls. They are incompetent to their sworn purpose, what good is an army like that.

[Code Pink Alert!]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: agitators; antiamericanism; antichristian; antigovernment; bigotry; bigots; bushhaters; christianbashing; coup; coupattempt; coupdetat; dncbrownshirts; dufu; dummie; dummiefunnies; dummies; liberalbigots; overthrow; religion; religiousintolerance; riot; sedition; seditioustalk; steve2470; stevenumbers; unamerican
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To: Talking_Mouse
Hmmm I guess it all depends on what goddess the wiccan follows now don't it. I served with a wiccan who followed Morrigan {sp?} the goddess of war. Good guy and honorable, as far as I know he didn't lie, cheat or steal and believed in the USA. The type of guy you could trust at your back. Don't dis them all.
As far as this DUMMMMMMMY post they never fail to amaze me. they really are digging themselves a deeper hole then I ever though anyone could..... and they just keep digging.
41 posted on 04/10/2006 6:46:35 AM PDT by SouthernBoyupNorth ("For my wings are made of Tungsten, my flesh of glass and steel..........")
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To: SCALEMAN

...while studiously ignoring the islamic fundie who really will..


42 posted on 04/10/2006 6:58:21 AM PDT by ariamne (Proud shieldmaiden of the infidel--never forget, never forgive 9/11)
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To: beans36
Nice theory, but I'm not buying it until you explain the roles of Halliburton, Diebold and Walmart in the grand scheme.

You say that like you're under the illusion that those are three separate companies.

SD

43 posted on 04/10/2006 7:01:57 AM PDT by SoothingDave
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To: franksolich
But surely there is a subterranean "floor" to how low they can go.

It's turtles all the way down.

SD

44 posted on 04/10/2006 7:03:08 AM PDT by SoothingDave
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To: franksolich
But surely there is a subterranean "floor" to how low they can go.

Every floor they sink to has a trap door.

45 posted on 04/10/2006 7:05:26 AM PDT by ariamne (Proud shieldmaiden of the infidel--never forget, never forgive 9/11)
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To: SoothingDave
It's turtles all the way down.

Well, it would be hard to get any lower than that time a DUmmie posted recipes about using placentae (afterbirths) for a dinner delicacy, but I imagine they will.....

46 posted on 04/10/2006 7:06:11 AM PDT by franksolich (everything changes every day)
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To: Chi-townChief
Paranoia strikes deep.

Well...they were PROBABLY saying the same thing about this place 7 years ago. There were numerous people on this site claiming Clinton had no plans of leaving office and would suspend the constitution. Of course, what separates us from them is there were some voices of reason HERE that tried to talk them out of that insanity...unlike over there where EVERYONE is saying that...but still...a large number of people over here at FR (and many of which are still here) thought he would not leave and would suspend the constitution.

Paranoia is not wasted on the left alone.

47 posted on 04/10/2006 7:16:59 AM PDT by NELSON111
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To: franksolich
HBO once, on a "Shock Video" program, showed the eating of this delicacy. The DUmmie probably just was aping that.

SD

48 posted on 04/10/2006 7:18:25 AM PDT by SoothingDave
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To: PJ-Comix

If the military didn't revolt under Clinton, as much as we collectively loathed everything he did and stood for, then there's not much hope the military will revolt under Bush.

Those who don't care for him will simply wait him out, like we did for eight long years of Clinton's antics.

Poor DUmmies are at their FUnniest when they pretend to understand the military!


49 posted on 04/10/2006 7:22:34 AM PDT by Not A Snowbird (Official RKBA Landscaper and Arborist, Duchess of Green Leafy Things)
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To: SoothingDave; beans36
You say that like you're under the illusion that those are three separate companies.

I covered all of that under the umbrella of "BFEE" -- if you can't keep up with the terminology, upgrade to better tin-foil.

50 posted on 04/10/2006 7:23:07 AM PDT by kevkrom ("...no one has ever successfully waged a war against stupidity" - Orson Scott Card)
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To: PJ-Comix
If DUmmie thread success is reducing one to speechlessness, this one's a winner: These people are freakin deranged. Not only are they advocating violent overthrow of an elected president (I LOVE that "I'm not advocating violence here, so just relax." BS--talk about a red flag!), but what is the source one of them mentions? The Turner Diaries! Kinda fits in with their hatred for the "Neo-Cons" (wink, wink, The Jooooos) schtick.

DU is getting creepy.

51 posted on 04/10/2006 7:37:32 AM PDT by Darkwolf377 ("Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all. " TR)
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To: PJ-Comix

I've said it before and I'll say it again: there are clear signs that individual DUmmies and DU as a group (i.e. mob) are inevitably and imminently going to crack up.

These fantasies (?) of the suspension of the Consitituion, military coup of some kind or another, etc. say that the whole bell curve of sanity is shifting for these guys.

Reading the FUnnies and reading the general news lately is kinda like being in really tight traffic just before an accident happens in front of you. You can see that the usual jerk behavior is there, but all of a sudden something goes wrong, a whole lot of swerving and wild action is going on all over the place, and before you can really figure out that something is going horribly wrong, you see the undercarriage of an SUV facing you or a pickup truck on its roof on the median.

Adverse reactions to the fall elections could be the final straw for some of these people.


52 posted on 04/10/2006 7:57:42 AM PDT by jiggyboy (Ten percent of poll respondents are either lying or insane)
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To: PJ-Comix
Cool---This sounds like MilGov vs CivGov in Twilight2000.
53 posted on 04/10/2006 7:59:07 AM PDT by .cnI redruM (Watching the Left turn on Senator McCain amuses me somehow....)
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To: PJ-Comix

All right, is it steve2370, 2470, or 2570?


54 posted on 04/10/2006 7:59:33 AM PDT by Choose Ye This Day (If low-skill workers were key to economic growth, Mexico would be an economic powerhouse.-Rich Lowry)
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To: MindBender26

LSD would improve their thoughtfulness and clarity. High Flying Fully tripping acidheads make ten times the sense these fools do. The next door neighbors cat makes more sense.


55 posted on 04/10/2006 8:04:51 AM PDT by justshutupandtakeit (If you believe ANYTHING in the Treason Media you are a fool.)
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To: PJ-Comix
We appreciate you DU funnies but honestly, how can you stand to go over to that dump and read all the insane stuff and not loose you own mind?
56 posted on 04/10/2006 8:08:46 AM PDT by p23185 (Being trashed by the Stone Age Press should be worn as a badge of honor by Repubs and Conservatives)
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To: weegee
because "they don't read twenty newspapers a day"

Belzer's "twenty newspapers" of choice are almost by defnition NYT and its echo chamber. You might as well read the same newspaper twenty times.

I rarely -- maybe once a month -- see something on TV that I haven't seen previously on FR. Drives jiggygirl nuts when I complete the otherwise-maddening "teases" they do on the local news before the breaks: TV: "Coming up: A motion to censure the President -- one Bay Area politician takes a bold stand..." me: "Boxer the commie, of course!" her: "Knock it off!"

57 posted on 04/10/2006 8:11:09 AM PDT by jiggyboy (Ten percent of poll respondents are either lying or insane)
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To: NELSON111
There were numerous people on this site claiming Clinton had no plans of leaving office and would suspend the constitution

Point of order: Clinton himself did "suggest" that he would stay in office after January 20 if necessary.

58 posted on 04/10/2006 8:15:26 AM PDT by jiggyboy (Ten percent of poll respondents are either lying or insane)
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To: kevkrom

These idiots said THE EXACT SAME THING about Bush cancelling the 2004 election. Not one of those morons even admited they were being fearmongers.


59 posted on 04/10/2006 8:33:40 AM PDT by Democratshavenobrains
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To: Democratshavenobrains

Ah, but don't forget the Rovian mind machine and those stolen ballots in Ohio - home of the eveeeellll Diebold!


60 posted on 04/10/2006 8:44:13 AM PDT by The Right Stuff
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