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DUmmie FUnnies 06-13-05 ("What meds do you take?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | June 13, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 06/13/2005 7:35:58 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Are there any pharmacologists out there? I will probably need your professional help in sorting out the MANY mood-altering meds listed in this DUmmie THREAD titled, “What meds do you take? Since the DUmmies have been spending much of their time escaping into an alternate reality, it is interesting to see what powerful drugs they have to ingest to accomplish this task. For example, I am figuring that it must take some POWERFUL acid to alter the DUmmie mind to the extent that they BEEEELEEEEEVE that John Kerry was inaugurated on Jan. 20. High drug dosage is so common in DUmmieland that I am surprised they haven’t established a DUmmie Pharmacy to distribute the meds necessary to enter their own alternate reality. The only “med” your humble correspondent takes currently (other than prescription blood pressure pills) is the non-prescription and VERY SMOOOOOTH slow aged Flor de Caña rum. Perhaps the DUmmies should think of switching to Flor de Caña rum. Not only would they pleasantly mellow out, but a few of them might actually relax enough to get a slight bit of common sense in their system. So let us now view the pharmacologically mind-altered DUmmie posts in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, anxiously awaiting the warm glow of his evening dosage of slow aged Flor de Caña, is in the [brackets]:

What meds do you take?

[As mentioned above, only a couple of glasses of slow aged Flor de Caña rum per evening. Right now my “prescription” is for the 7 year old rum but perhaps someday I will become worthy enough qualify for the 12 year old Flor de Caña rum or maybe, just maybe, I can even think about aspiring to the 18 year old Flor de Caña rum. However, let us now view the LOOONG list of mind altering meds you DUmmies are desperately ingesting to kill the pain of our current REPUBLICAN reality.[

Don't answer if it is too personal; I understand. I have some Clonazepam on hand for when I get asthma/anxiety attacks. .5 mg is very weak... but I'm rocking 2 of the suckers right now so I'm at 1mg as we speak. Fairly relaxing since it is a benzodiapene.

[When the pain of seeing George W. Bush in the White House becomes too great, just pull the axe off the wall and break open that emergency bottle of benzodiapene.]

here we go... i hate drug names... so... unfriendly...minocycleine so i dont get all pimple-y and zyrtec so i can breathe during the months where everythign isnt frozen over.

[Zyrtec is also great for helping you to perform simple body functions during the months when your mind is frozen over.]

I take tons of medicine.Here's the list: Paxil for depression,Xanax for anxiety/panic attack,Dalmane to sleep,Ventolin for asthma,Trazodone as anti-depressor and sleeping aid and Advair for asthma.Plus some generic painkillers for chronic pain.I'm only 37 but my grand father who is over a 100 is in better shape than me.Pretty depressing isn't it.

[May I forward that EXTENSIVE med list over to Pied Piper Pitt since he hasn’t slept since April due to extreme anxiety over defrauding his fellow DUmmies by cheerleading them into donating to Andy Stephenson’s non-existent pancreatic cancer operation?]

Oh geez, where to begin. I am an exercise in polypharmacy.

Synthroid for hypothyroidism
Topamax for mood stabilization and migraine
prophylaxis
Verapamil for migraine prophylaxis
Imitrex and Amerge PRN as migraine abortives
Vicodin PRN as a migraine rescue med
Percocet PRN for menstrual cramps
I also take various OTCs as needed and daily vitamin/mineral/other supplements.

[Perhaps you should simply cover your body with a giant prophylaxis to blot out the unpleasant reality of a REPUBLICAN White House, Congress, and Judiciary.]

just a handful
Diclofenac--arthritis prednisone--arthritis methtrexate—arthritis
Verapamil--blood pressure Dyrenium--water pill

[When Cheney is elected in ’08 you might want to consider adding cyanide to that list.]

migraine & allergy meds:
migraine prophylaxis:
singulair (normally prescribed for asthma, which i do not have)
petadolex (an herb)
co-q10
migraine prn:
zomig (i rotate between zomig and imitrex when my body adjusts)
stadol (narcotic, only if zomig fails)
allergy prophylaxis:
nasonex
allergy prn:
semprex-d

[Methinks that on Election Night of 2008, you’re going to have to TRIPLE your med dosage for migraine.]

methadone- 60-70mg daily for chronic pain
flexeril- 50-60mg daily
prednisone- 10mg every other day
ambien- occasionaly for help sleeping

[Methadone? Isn’t that a med that is supposed to substitute for heroin? In any case, I think you will be shooting up heroin directly into your arm on Election Night 2008 in an attempt to kill the pain. But don’t worry. Susan Estrich will be in even WORSE shape than you.]

I'm sure if I went and got checked out I'd be prescribed half a dozen or so medications for depression and anxiety, but I prefer to wallow in my own misery.

[That’s the spirit! Face the incredible pain of this country’s dominant conservatism without resorting to any of those pansy meds.]

I Got You All Beat:
Daily: Cozaar, Tolinase, Actos, Lasix, Lopid, Elavil, Buspar, Topamax, Vicodin, Lomotil, QVar, Atrovent, Albuteral
As Needed: Norco, Fiorinal, Maxalt, Imitrex Stat Dose, Phenergran, Ditropan, Rantidine, Flexeril, Soma
Often on: Cipro and/or Nitrofuratoin

[Braggart!]

Anti-depressants - for me - all seem to make sex less enjoyable, which in turn causes even more depression. Is this just me, or do other people experience the same thing? The problem here in the UK is that doctors are overworked and far less inclined to spend time tweaking meds until they get things just right for a patient, which I find incredibly frustrating

[But…but I thought Britain had this WONDERFUL nationalized health care system that all you DUmmies seem to be boosting! And now you tell me that the doctors in the UK nationalized health care system don’t have much time for their patients. I am so depressed hearing this that I need to pop a prozac.]

i was on Clonazepam, Trazadone, zoloft, valium, wellbutrian and several others. I had really bad depression after the birth of my child and my inlaws didn't help. They told me that I was crazy and making it up cause I wanted attention. I went to several docs and they had me drugged up. I was so high that I was almost drooling. I finally got sick of it all and quite all them. I really do need an anti-depressant but I am afraid to be a zombie again.

[Newsflash, DUmmie earthmama! You’re STILL drooling.]

I don't like the idea of being hooked on chemicals for life, basically. What if there's a terrorist attack/nuclear winter and I can't get it? What if there's a recall because it's really ruining my liver (or whatever)? I wish I could find some kind of natural remedy, or be cured or something. But it's way easier to take my medicine and be on to other things.

[My suggestion is to build a vast underground fallout shelter to store all your meds.]

Ziac (keeps my BP down) Cymbalta (an SSRI)
Gabapentin (add'l depression treatment)
Prevacid (keeps my gorge from rising, all you Shakespeare fans)
I used to take Vioxx. Rasser frasser... I now take Aleve and Tylenol as if they were M&Ms. I honestly don't know what I'd prefer -- increased risk of heart attack, or this f*cking pain.

[Look at the bright side of it, DUmmie bertha katzenengel. At least you are no longer a Vioxx addict. Now take two Tylenols to kill your “f*cking pain.”]

Duragesic, Lortab, Soma, Naproxen and Ambien...There's more. Can't remember them all for obvious reasons.

[The obvious reason being that your meds have killed your long and short term memory or would be able to produce your extensive med list.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies
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To: SCALEMAN

First time I drank Glen Fiddich was in a motel room in Ohio. I just intended to have a couple of drinks but finished off the whole bottle. Most surprising thing was waking up the next morning WITHOUT a hangover.


161 posted on 06/13/2005 4:36:22 PM PDT by PJ-Comix ( Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: visualops

"It didn't make me sleepy though."

Wow! It makes most people drowsy. My husband prescibed it quite a bit and he said 10mg usually makes people really drowsy. I can take 5mg without drowsiness, though.


162 posted on 06/13/2005 4:37:57 PM PDT by imskylark
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To: franksolich

Right after the election (and later inaguration) the DUmmy threads were LOADED with things like "I haven't left my house in 2 days (weeks/months). I can't even get enough energy to even open the door to cash my worker's comp check. Good thing my Mom brought my Xanax or I don't know what I would do..."

Is it any surprise that mental illness and liberalism go hand-in-hand?

I know some FReepers might have to have meds to clean up brain imbalance, but very few and almost all keep it a secret.


163 posted on 06/13/2005 4:38:41 PM PDT by m87339 (Squawk: "Plane is rough on Autoland" Response: "Autoland not installed on this equipment")
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To: PJ-Comix
methadone- 60-70mg daily for chronic pain flexeril- 50-60mg daily prednisone- 10mg every other day ambien- occasionaly for help sleeping

[Methadone? Isn’t that a med that is supposed to substitute for heroin?

You are correct, PJ. Being one who battled heroin addiction in the early 90's, I can verify this. I was on 100mg. a day for a while(that is a HIGH dose). I can say that it is more addicting, and harder on the body and mind, than street heroin. From experience, the little pharmacological cocktail that this DUer is taking, is definite evidence of a heroin junkie.

164 posted on 06/13/2005 4:39:44 PM PDT by Jackknife (No man is entitled to the blessings of freedom unless he be vigilant in its preservation.-MacArthur)
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To: All
Here's some more great comedy at the expense of another criminal besides Scamdy:
www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1422132

If you're not offended at a limit bit of crude humor, by all means check it out! Very worth the D/L time, imo.

165 posted on 06/13/2005 4:43:46 PM PDT by Chappaquiddick Crawdad ("E unum pluribus"? Perhaps you meant "ex uno plures", or is that "stultus sum"? hmmm...)
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To: jakkknife

jakkknife,
OT. Just looked at your homepage. I spent today at Gettysburg. Go there once or twice a year. Always see something new.


166 posted on 06/13/2005 4:44:36 PM PDT by gate2wire (We Honor Those Who Serve---WE REMEMBER--Thank you)
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To: visualops

"It didn't make me sleepy though."

Wow! It makes most people drowsy. My husband prescibed it quite a bit and he said 10mg usually makes people really drowsy. I can take 5mg without drowsiness, though.


167 posted on 06/13/2005 4:45:45 PM PDT by imskylark
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To: imskylark

Sorry about the double post. Not sure how that happened.


168 posted on 06/13/2005 4:48:47 PM PDT by imskylark
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To: imskylark
This person is an addict with no desire to get clean.

You are correct. See my reply # 164. 60-70 mgs of methadone would make a straight person passout (after getting violently ill), and be residually high for a few days, after about a 24hr sleep.

169 posted on 06/13/2005 4:49:07 PM PDT by Jackknife (No man is entitled to the blessings of freedom unless he be vigilant in its preservation.-MacArthur)
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To: PJ-Comix

Geez, and they think WE'RE the ones who are on drugs? Incredible!


170 posted on 06/13/2005 4:53:19 PM PDT by Purrcival (Democrats in power are dangerous. Democrats out of power are pathetic and funny.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I thought I was in bad shape because I have to take Nexium for acid reflux, and an occasional aspirin, but I feel downright healthy now, for a 46 year old......

Dirtbiker thought for the day: You didn't stop racing because you got old; you got old because you stopped racing!

171 posted on 06/13/2005 4:54:53 PM PDT by dirtbiker (Solution for Terrorism: Nuke 'em 'till they glow, then shoot 'em in the dark!)
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To: Blue Jays
Several of those dingbats listed "Soma" as a drug they're taking. That isn't even a real drug from legitimate pharmaceutical companies!

It is a very effective muscle-relaxer. I have a bad back, and this is my emergency backup, in case I have a really bad spell with it. I really don't like taking it, because it knocks me out.


172 posted on 06/13/2005 4:56:41 PM PDT by Jackknife (No man is entitled to the blessings of freedom unless he be vigilant in its preservation.-MacArthur)
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To: MamaB

So sorry for your loss...

:-(


173 posted on 06/13/2005 4:57:32 PM PDT by Purrcival (Democrats in power are dangerous. Democrats out of power are pathetic and funny.)
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To: TheBigB
This is quite obviously related to their usual comments about how much happier libs are than us conservatives.

If I took that much medication, I'd be happy, too. (Not that I'm not happy now....life is a high all it's own....beats the alternative!

174 posted on 06/13/2005 5:01:30 PM PDT by dirtbiker (Solution for Terrorism: Nuke 'em 'till they glow, then shoot 'em in the dark!)
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To: Purrcival
Here are a few more DUmmie posts on that thread after this edition was posted:

I take Amisulpride as an anti-psychotic & Sodium Valporate as a mood stabilizer tho I'm about to switch to Quetiapine for my a/p.

[Apparently Amisulpride didn't work as an anti-psychotic since I detect you are still very psychotic.]

Where to start...?
Fluoxetine to keep my head from falling off
Clonazepam for anxiety (needed that at graduation rehearsal--lines and crowds)
Maxalt for migraines
Various OTC stuff for pain
Soon (I hope) I'll have a decent prescription for sleep again. Trazadone worked but left me with a nasty headache the next morning.

[Sorry about that Fluoxetine not working out for you.]

175 posted on 06/13/2005 5:04:23 PM PDT by PJ-Comix ( Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: MarineBrat; PJ-Comix; franksolich; Charles Henrickson

As for me, I'm taking medications for high blood pressure and high cholesterol, along with an occasional Naproxen or Advil for back pain, and occasional hits of an Albuterol inhaler for mild asthma -- all related to past choices of Twinkies and fast food over salads, fruit, lean meat, and vegetables. Now, if I could just get myself to start choosing salads, lean meats, whole grains, fruit and vegetables over pizza and Ho-Hos and the like, and get my very ample butt over to the gym, I just might be able to reverse this trend and get completely off this stuff.


176 posted on 06/13/2005 5:07:25 PM PDT by Purrcival (Democrats in power are dangerous. Democrats out of power are pathetic and funny.)
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To: Calusa
I thought maybe you were thinking about Premarin, a female hormone replacement made from, guess what?

Pregnant mare"s urine

177 posted on 06/13/2005 5:09:59 PM PDT by Morgan's Raider
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To: SCALEMAN
"...then tried some single malts, and now I'm hooked and can't go back..."

Got a list o' links for ya, laddie:

http://www.awa.dk/whisky/stills/index.htm
178 posted on 06/13/2005 5:10:14 PM PDT by decal (Where were YOU when AndyScam broke? Sluthering, perhaps?)
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To: Purrcival

<<only medication four aspirin a day.

Never anything else, never need anything else.


179 posted on 06/13/2005 5:10:37 PM PDT by franksolich (wolkenkuckucksheim)
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To: MarineBrat
Holy mackeral, they're taking Vicodin daily?

2 years ago, I had surgery to remove a gangling sisk from my left wrist. (Racing injury, handlebars landed on my wrist when I crashed...) The doc prescribed Loritabs (same as Vicodin) for pain. The day after surgery, my wrist was hurting bad, so I took one. I was sick to my stomach for a day and a half! "F" the pills, the pain was easier to take!

180 posted on 06/13/2005 5:11:03 PM PDT by dirtbiker (Solution for Terrorism: Nuke 'em 'till they glow, then shoot 'em in the dark!)
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