DUmmie FUnnies 02-28-05 ("This Third American Empire (seeking input)"---Pied Piper Pitt)

DUmmie FUnnies ^ | February 28, 2005 | DUmmies, Pied Piper Pitt, and PJ-Comix

[DBeers]

Pitt will have to include the persecution of homosexuals by nazi homophobes and the celeb status of walmart among the movement in his next revision...

[planekT]

PJ, I laughed so hard I cried. This has got to be one of the best DUFUs yet.

Somebody give this man a cigar and book deal, for crying out loud!

[PJ-Comix]

Somebody should see that Jeff Kleinman of the Graybill and English Literary Agency get his own entry into Wikipedia.Com.

[Choose Ye This Day]

September 11 as the inevitable consequence of 50 years of US foreign policy

It's ALL our fault. WE'RE the bad guys. Osama is the real victim. blah blah blah

[PJ-Comix]

Pied Piper Pitt should have Ward Churchill write the intro to his book.

[Choose Ye This Day]

Or Howard Dean.

Or Michael Moore.

Or Dennis Kucinich.

Or...

[demlosers]

Bump for later... :)

[lonevoice]

But what about Skull and Bones? The Bilderbergers, the Illuminati, Masons, the CFR and PNAC? Have they all been subsumed by the CNP? Pitt's lucky he can count on the DUmmies drug induced short term memory problems.

I can just picture the Fourth Amerian Empire filled with goosestepping CNP troopers screaming “USA! USA! USA!”

I say we start practicing now! The collapse of the third empire is imminent and there's no time to waste.

[MarineBrat]

Tried to read it .... but .... red ..... parts ..... made ...........me ..... sleepywo29rnnnfnaaadczzzzz NO CARRIER

[PJ-Comix]

Hey! I just found out that our very won franksolich is under the weather with pnemonia. Hope you get better soon! And the rest of you can send out your regards to franksolich as well. He must be really under the weather since he isn't even posting on the DUFUs.

[rockrr]

What you said ;'}

[Charles Henrickson]

the avatar

Didn't that win some Oscars last night?

[Congressman Billybob]

I have had some personal dealings with Pitt. To put it simply, he is one of those people who have a hundred-dollar vocabulary and fifty-cent ideas. You read their stuff, you think it seems to be serious and weighty. But when you analyze it, it's like intellectual cotton candy. It looks large, but there is almost no substance there.

On the subject of the "American empire," regardless of how many you attempt to name and number, there is a central falsehood. Anyone who reads the history of empires -- Mongols, Romans, Britons, Germans, Russians, etc. -- should note a central fact. All true empires seize and hold territory and EXTRACT tribute.

True empires are profit-making enterprises regardless of the political system that created them. What is America's history? After it seizes territory in war, it sets up a free and democratic government, it PAYS substantial aid to get that nation back on its feet. And then America withdraws. The behavior of this nation is the opposite of all the empires in the recorded history of mankind.

But people like Pitt are too busy seeking scapegoats and exercising his vocabulary to do anything so prosaic as research, or to apply logic. Pitt is entirely typical of the leftist fools in this respect.

Congressman Billybob

Latest column, "By Dawn's Early Light"

[CzarNicky]

I cannot gather whether Pied Piper Pitt is the most stupid person I have ever read or just winding the DUmmies up. The screed he presented is so stupid only an intellectual would believe it.

[X-FID]

CNP? This bad college term paper is more like a load of CR*P.

After reading that I think I'll take a 'movement liberal'.

[Charles Henrickson]

he is one of those people who have a hundred-dollar vocabulary and fifty-cent ideas. You read their stuff, you think it seems to be serious and weighty. But when you analyze it, it's like intellectual cotton candy. It looks large. . . .

You could even say it looms large.

[gidget7]

"The forth empire is what you should funnel it into. I will buy your book because it will offer questions and not easy answers.The easy answers may be the downfall of humanity . The technology is here for us to use or have it use us. "




If anything, the downfall of humanity will be the failure of Health Organizations world wide, to address the AIDS crisis, and STOP the spread before it mutates into something contractible in other ways, than which it presently is!!. Instead they are promoting the lifestyle and endorsing and glorifiying it's spread!!!

These folks are nuts! Maybe they should title this book, "How to rewrite history and Influence DUmmies!!"

[gidget7]

Get Well Soon!! Frank! Lots and lots and lots of fluids!

[Charles Henrickson]

Some of the syntax is pretty strained. The metaphors seemed forced in places. And the tone varies between would-be epic, straight historical, and mildly colloquial.

Thanks for that nascent input deconstructing Pitt's overweening style. His mixed metaphors, while seeking to cement their ascendancy, do after a fashion collapse under their own weight. Redundant and repetitive noun and/or verb combines all the while are allowed to flower and flourish. There are cracks in the underpinnings of whole swaths of the veneer with each passing paragraph. The line of demarcation has been crossed, on an epic scale. Under the banner of "academic prose," a banner unfurled to mesmerize the DUmmie populace, this avatar of bloviation has attached himself umbilically to a college-sophomore style of writing that has long been the sharp saber piercing the eye of every term-paper reader across the width and breadth of the footholds and strongholds of academia. Pitt's turgid history is written in goo. DUmmies always embarrass themselves. Always.

[Fenris6]

It was at Lake Placid that the now-familiar chant of “U.S.A.! U.S.A.!” was born. The American people had been well-trained during the second empire to expect being on top, and the years prior to Lake Placid had been hard. Something so simple as a win on that ice was enough to strike sparks again, to ignite the long fuse that has been this third American empire. The American people were mesmerized by the vision of their flag rising next to but just a little higher than the red Soviet banner. It was their first taste of what would become a long and uninterrupted stretch of total global dominance.

What a waste of an education. Lake Placid was about underdog amateurs dethroning a professional Soviet Hockey team with nothing but Heart. Pitt twists that into some sinister nationalism, to weave into his alternate reality.