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DUmmie FUnnies 11-30-04 PM Edition ("WE ARE GOING TO WIN THIS, I GUARANTEE YOU....")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | November 30, 2004 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 11/30/2004 7:09:10 PM PST by PJ-Comix

The DUmmies are so far gone into fantasy that it takes a very special thread to grab my attention in the auditioning process for the DUmmie Funnies. I believe I have found such a Dummie discussion so completely divorced from reality that it deserves to be honored with a DUmmie FUnnies edition. I therefore present to you this hallowed THREAD appropriately titled, “WE ARE GOING TO WIN THIS, I GUARANTEE YOU....” Yup! It’s an absolute guarantee that Kerry will enter the White House this January. Therefore as a public service I again list the Suicide Hotline number for the DUmmies to call this Jan. 20: 1-800-BUSH-WON. As usual the DUmmie Delusions are in Bolshevik Red while the comments of your humble correspondent, still amazed that the DUmmies continue to eagerly swallow the bunkum, are in the [brackets]:

WE ARE GOING TO WIN THIS, I GUARANTEE YOU.... Kerry will be in the White House as long as we keep up the pace we have been at the last few weeks. We need to keep the emails going, keep the protests going...as long as we do this more and more leaders will fall in line as they see the movement grow.

[Oh thank you, DUmmie tbuddha, for posting this! But even more practical than sending out emails is to close our eyes real tight and visualize out own reality of a Kerry win.]

I can't say this enough:

1) Protest, Protest, Protest

If you have time to attend any protest in your area, DO IT. Get out there. Especially in Ohio and Florida. We did one in CO and it made the news. IT puts a face to this that people DO CARE about this election for all to see.

[Visualize, Visualize, Visualize.]

2) Email, Email, Email

Use our talking points (see below). Send to local media. Send to national media. Send to congressmen. Send to friends and family. Post in various blogs. Bookmark as many sites you can and put them all in a "stolen election" folder for easy reference. Save good articles as Word docs for cut and paste later.

[Wish, Wish, Wish.]

TALKING POINT: We have mountains of evidence of fraud. From voting machines that counted extra Bush votes to voter suppression and intimidation. We have hundreds of incidences that republicans used. Every established indicator of fraud that we have is showing that this election was STOLEN.

[Of course there was intimidation. All those young voters inspired to go to the polls by Rock The Vote were intimidated from voting due to having to wait more than 10 minutes on the lines. You can’t expect them to wait that long when they have the important Rave club scene to get to.]

Pound these republicans with the message. Thank Jesse Jackson for putting his ass out there. He needs our support. We have a huge lead on the truth right now and as long as we keep our talpking points out there, OUR talking heads on the TV will get the message out better in the coming weeks. But we have to protest too. And if they try to stone wall in court, we'll protest there too.

[And don’t forgive to send oodles of cash to Bev Harris. She is working diligently for us by coming up with new marketing plans for her Vote Fraud documentary.]

"Be the steamroller, not the asphalt". Personally, for me it's not enough to see Kerry inaugarated in January. I want Bush in the Hague for the war crimes he has commited, where he can sit and play spades all day with Saddam and Milosevic.

[“Be a toilet, not a turd.”]

I wish I had your confidence. Perhaps it's the loss of energy from fighting this vicious cold, but I'm quickly running out of steam. It all seems like such a done deal at this point. *primal scream*....if I had the strength that is.

[Forget Primal Scream. I find that smashing my head against a brick wall works wonders in getting my confidence back.]

Yes, I thought Kerry would win in a landslide. How are we going to get him to unconcede?

[By getting him to enter a Deconcession Chamber for a couple of hours.]

I don't know your ultimate goal but mounting evidence points to the fact that Kerry, indeed, won by a landslide if you remember that the Republicans manipulated the results in 3 states that are worth 52 electoral votes!

[And that’s an established fact! There is no proof but we don’t need no stinkin’ proof!]

As soon as the votes are there I'm pretty sure he'll accept the presidency.

[“Hi John Kerry! We are here to tell you that the votes you need to win are out there somewhere. So you can go ahead now and accept the presidency.”]

Oh my God, it would be so sweet if Kerry won this election after all...especially so I can tell all the freepers I know to kiss my liberal ass!!

[Go ahead and gloat just like you did on the afternoon of Nov. 2 when the exit polls showed Kerry winning.]

The last few weeks have sucked ass, waiting for counts to be certified and not being able to do much. But we're getting close to the time when we find out the truth. We know how the MSM work. WE HAVE TO BE LOUD TO BE HEARD!!!! We have to TAKE TO THE STREETS in Ohio this weekend and our state capitols nest weekend. Look what's happening in Ukraine! We have to talk to people we know - everyone - so that this theory stops being tin-foiled! WE KNOW THIS IS REAL!!!!!

[WOO! HOO! The Moronic Convergence happens this weekend!]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: brownshirtsforkerry; bushwins; byanymeansnecessary; civilwar2; civilwarii; conspiracy; conspiracytheory; dementeddummies; dummies; eattinfoil; gettingintheshower; goebbelswouldbeproud; johnkerry; loosers; moronicconvergence; revolution; thebiglie; themobrules; tinfoil; traitorslose; weartinfoildonteatit
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To: PJ-Comix

Excellent PJ !


21 posted on 11/30/2004 7:43:02 PM PST by The Mayor (We may whitewash sin, but only Jesus' blood can truly wash it white.)
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To: ariamne

Hi! And welcome! You're not alone here. Lot's of ex-ignorami here, like me.

I came to my senses in 1998. But before that I voted for Clinton twice and Dukakis. Clinton himself helped reform me (character DOES count!)


22 posted on 11/30/2004 7:44:44 PM PST by stands2reason
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To: PJ-Comix
The last few weeks have sucked ass, waiting for counts to be certified and not being able to do much. But we're getting close to the time when we find out the truth...

As Boortz says, Know The Truth And The Truth Shall Make You Mad!

These losers are already stark-raving mad, and the final outcome will drive them completely over the edge. Time to buy a BUNCH of stock in Prosac, Luvox, and Thorazine!

23 posted on 11/30/2004 7:49:11 PM PST by Morgan's Raider
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To: ariamne
Tweet! Tweet!

Piping you aboard.

Welcome.

Leni

24 posted on 11/30/2004 7:49:17 PM PST by MinuteGal
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To: TruthWillWin

And others, thank you for the welcome, it's so nice to be here. In the 90's I was starting to doubt the success of social programs and decided I was for the death penalty after reading FBI profiler John Douglas. But I'd have to say 9/11 was the beginning of the end--still not sure, still Bush-hating, but ANGRY! and loving Rudy J. I waited for the righteous indignation from my comrades, my co-workers at the environmental org I worked for, in the days after the attack (which they referred to as the "incident"). All I heard was abuse of my country and Israel. And I could no longer ignore the anti-semitism that pervades the left. Trust me, it does, and self-hating leftist jews are marching themselves back to the ovens with this lot. Then Pres Bush took action in Afghanistan and I was all YES! a man who will stand and fight. Friends and colleagues were all aghast..and they despise people in the military. You all probably suspected or know this, but their "support the troops, bring them home" rap is crap. They still call people in the military babykillers, and torturers. Then I came out in 2003 for the war in Iraq and was fired two months later. So much for tolerating other viewpoints, which you know they don't. OK, don't want to vanity post, so email me offline if you want. Love you guys, you are awesome.


25 posted on 11/30/2004 7:49:53 PM PST by ariamne (reformed liberal)
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To: PJ-Comix

Can't these morons give it a rest? It's over and they lost.


26 posted on 11/30/2004 7:50:10 PM PST by rdl6989 (4 More Years! 4 More Years!)
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To: stands2reason

We should get together and write a book, "The Road Back to Sanity". I voted Carter, Carter, Mondale, Dukie, Clinton, Clinton, and Gore before I put down the kool-aid. And yes, character does count.


27 posted on 11/30/2004 7:53:35 PM PST by ariamne (reformed liberal)
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To: PJ-Comix

You are the man PJ-Comix. Thank you for a great laugh before going to bed.


28 posted on 11/30/2004 7:54:02 PM PST by jveritas
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To: PJ-Comix
I can't say this enough:

1) Protest, Protest, Protest


I can't say this enough:

LOSER, LOSER, LOSER!
29 posted on 11/30/2004 7:55:14 PM PST by Freepdonia (Victory is Ours! (I told you so :-))
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To: jocon307

A lot of us blue staters are red all the way through...


30 posted on 11/30/2004 7:55:25 PM PST by ariamne (reformed liberal)
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To: PJ-Comix
Delicious, as usual. I can't wait to put this into a book form.

HEY duMMIES! DO YOU HEAR ME? WE ARE GOING TO MAKE YOU FAMOUS! LIKE THE THREE STOOGES.

After I stop laughing I think it will be time to go to bed. I'm on the East Coast. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, h... Yawn.

You DUmmies do realize that you have the perfect comedy team. After all, how could Stiller and Meara, Martin and Lewis, Rowan and Martin, etc., ever compete with Kerry and Edwards? I mean that video of Edwards doing his hair? Man what a hoot. And Kerry hunting? LOLLOLLOL! These guys are the funniest duo since Amos and Andy, Andy and Barney, Brokaw and Rather.

But you know what was the funniest thing I have ever seen? No? Well it was on your website. Come on, guess. Come on. No guess, well I'll tell you. It was page one through page infinity. Because we have a record of the DU Funnies and we will provide that record for all of history to discuss.

You know why DUmmies? Because we can. And because you can't debate us without saying "well we aren't getting anywhere so let's stop" You p***ants cant' even debate us. Believe me. I have tried. I live in a very liberal community, I have very liberal in-laws, but they all give me the same response.

Well it seems I don't have to non-debate you anymore because George W. Bush has a mandate, he also has a VP who is not running for president, he also has a friendly congress and senate, he also has a brilliant mind and a will. So he can steer this country for the next two decades, including judicial appointments. He will make a huge thumbprint on this earth. More so than any president since FDR. You had better get used to it. Your time has come and gone. Good-bye.

31 posted on 11/30/2004 7:56:13 PM PST by groanup (Rats are afraid of the light so spread a little sunshine.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Please add me to the ping list ... and keep up the good work.


32 posted on 11/30/2004 7:57:02 PM PST by Polonius (It's called logic, it'll help you.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

lol that's funny!


33 posted on 11/30/2004 7:57:04 PM PST by visualops (Freedom is worth fighting for, dying for and standing for: the advance of freedom leads to peace-GWB)
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To: ariamne

Welcome aboard! Nice to be on the right side doesn't it? Reading these losers, it is truely amazing how they could function in daily life (of course, I too was one of them as well. But this was when I was young and stupid. I don't know how they could be the same now. Absolutely scary).


34 posted on 11/30/2004 7:57:50 PM PST by Simmy2.5 (Kerry has been relieved of duty!)
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To: Libertina
( loved the "deconsession chamber")

LOL...yes, the deconcession chamber is a classic!

35 posted on 11/30/2004 7:58:38 PM PST by evad (DUmmie FUnnies and Pookie Toons-the start of a nice day)
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To: ariamne

welcome to the light :)


36 posted on 11/30/2004 7:59:00 PM PST by visualops (Freedom is worth fighting for, dying for and standing for: the advance of freedom leads to peace-GWB)
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To: stands2reason
Clinton himself helped reform me (character DOES count!)

I'm another convert from that time as well. I used to be totally brainwashed, but now (thanks to the clintons) libs couldn't sell me soap.

37 posted on 11/30/2004 8:01:05 PM PST by LibSnubber (liberal democrats are domestic terrorists)
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To: PJ-Comix

I never though I would say this. I am beginning to feel sorry for them. ;9(


38 posted on 11/30/2004 8:03:54 PM PST by Ditter
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To: evad

ROTFLOL I won't ask who took the photo on your home page! LOL


39 posted on 11/30/2004 8:04:31 PM PST by Libertina (We praise You Lord, You have granted America a Christian leader!)
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To: Ditter

It's tough to feel sorry for a group of people who are willfully and genuinely stupid.


40 posted on 11/30/2004 8:08:56 PM PST by GOP_Raider (RAIDERS 25, Broncos 24. How you like us now Shanahan?)
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