Skip to comments.
Freeoples Thread 327
Posted on 07/30/2002 8:04:08 PM PDT by Mo1
T h r e a d ... 3 2 7
TOPICS: Freeoples; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: freeople; humor; news; politics
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 1,061-1,080, 1,081-1,100, 1,101-1,120 ... 1,261-1,278 next last
To: operation clinton cleanup; Mo1
I think I might actually be tired now. Good night you two. Peace. Shalom.
To: ValerieUSA
Sweet Dreams Val
1,082
posted on
08/04/2002 1:02:17 AM PDT
by
Mo1
To: operation clinton cleanup
Well I'm off to bed myself ...
Nighty Nite
1,083
posted on
08/04/2002 1:41:32 AM PDT
by
Mo1
To: All
What am I the first one up???
Say it ain't so
1,084
posted on
08/04/2002 8:51:33 AM PDT
by
Mo1
To: Mo1
Good morning MO, I'm a late riser.
To: Mo1
I've been up. Just wasn't in the mood for talking to myself this morning.
To: ValerieUSA; Mo1; Canadian Outrage
To: sweetliberty
*L* I've read some of the books, too, and I think they are poorly written, erroneous, commercial rip-offs taking advantage of a captive audience of nice people who don't dare criticize because they are so desperate for appropriate entertainment material in this worldly country that the notions of value and depth haven't developed yet.
To: ValerieUSA
Well, I like them. This most recent one drags a little, but overall, I have enjpyed the series. I'm normally not too big on fiction but I have always enjoyed biblical novels and these books seem a lot like that, only with a prophetic context rather than an historical one.
To: Mo1
Deep in the backwoods the hillbilly's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said, "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing."
Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. "Whoa there," said the doctor. "Don't be in a rush to put the lantern down...I think there's another one coming."
Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a baby girl.
"No, no, don't be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern...It seems there's yet another one in there!" cried the doctor.
The hillbilly scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, "Do you think it's the light that's attractin' 'em?"
To: sweetliberty
Ooops ... sorry I was cleaning up the computer and trying to get the dang gifs to work ... grrrrrrrrrrr
I STILL can't do it through IE
1,091
posted on
08/04/2002 9:48:06 AM PDT
by
Mo1
To: Mo1
Oh baby it's cold in this house
I think the Hubby lowered the temp ... brrrrrrrrr
1,092
posted on
08/04/2002 9:50:28 AM PDT
by
Mo1
To: Mo1
25 WAYS TO ANNOY A YANKEE1)Take your own sweet time when doing ANYTHING.
2)Pronounce all one-syllable words with two.
3)When giving directions, finish with "it's right down yonder on the left."
4)Talk REAL slow, and ask them to speak more slowly so you can understand what they're saying.
5)When they talk nostalgically about the North, tell 'em "Delta's ready when you are!"
6)Talk loudly and often about SEC football or ACC basketball.
7)Refer to every soft drink as a Coke.
8)Always order sweet tea and/or grits. When they don't have it, raise a ruckus.
9)Offer to send 'em a bottle of fresh air.
10)Insist on being addressed by your first AND middle names. (e.g. Lisa Marie -- John Michael -- Jim Bob. . .)
11)Frequently bring up "The War of Northern Aggression" in conversation. If anyone ever says the words "Civil War", always interject that "there was nothing civil about it."
12)Address all males as "son" and females as "little lady".
13)Correct their pronunciation of certain words. For example: It's "pee-can."
14)Put Tabasco on everything.
15)For New York Yankees: Act as if the whole state of New York is New York City. In other words, if they say "Yo, I'm from upstate New Yoik!", say , "Well I'll be, my wife has always wanted to see a Broadway show!"
16)When invited to dinner, offer to bring dessert. Show up with a box of Moon Pies - banana ones.
17)Name all of your children "Bubba".
18)Use the word "reckon" in a sentence.
19)"Mash" buttons. "Cut" off lights. "Carry" the kids to school. "Fetch" something.
20)Never simply "do" something. Be "fixin to do" something.
21)Tell them you don't have an accent, they do.
22)Be sure to include "yes/no ma'am/sir" in all conversations.
23)Only use landmarks and ramble on when giving directions. "Now go down Jeff Davis Highway and turn left at where the Chevron station used to be. I think they turned it into a Amoco or maybe a BP. Anyway, turn right there."
24)Ask them if it's still snowing up North. Then tell 'em you went driving around in your convertible this weekend.
25)Call 'em a Yankee. Works every time.
To: sweetliberty
It drags? Why? Because they have no intention of giving the readers any kind of value for their money. They are cranking them out for BIG MONEY and no other reason.
The price they charge for those books is outrageous - and for what? Half of each book is a rehash of the previous books. You only get a few chapters each time for the price of a full book. It's a rip-off scheme.
To: sweetliberty
I am sad to report ... most of that list sounds like the hubby
Especially #1
You should have seen him screening in the porch
I finally got to the point I said .. Will ya nail the damn thing
1,095
posted on
08/04/2002 9:59:11 AM PDT
by
Mo1
To: ValerieUSA
Al Gore was campaigning at an old age retirement home. He went up to a woman and shook her hand and said, "Do you know who I am?"
"No," replied the old woman, "but if you go to the front desk, they'll tell you!
To: Mo1
LOL!
To: sweetliberty
"Do you think it's the light that's attractin' 'em?"
LOL - thanks. ;-)
To: sweetliberty
You laugh ... he is sloooooooooooooooooooow
Even my neighbors have noticed this .. so I don't feel so bad when I finally say something
1,099
posted on
08/04/2002 10:05:13 AM PDT
by
Mo1
To: lodwick
Things Not to Say to a Police Officer:
I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
Are You Andy or Barney?
I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
I pay your salary!
Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
When the Officer says "Gee Son...Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 1,061-1,080, 1,081-1,100, 1,101-1,120 ... 1,261-1,278 next last
Disclaimer:
Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual
posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its
management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the
exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson