Immigrant jokes about Germany

X ^ | May 1st 2026 | Nioh Berg

[ChessExpert]

Germany is so far gone that even immigrants have their own jokes about themselves all being on welfare while the natives work to pay for their lifestyle.

[MotorCityBuck]

👍😃

[Brian Griffin]

I have a “Witzbuch für Kinder”.

The Germans do have a sense of humor.

[Organic Panic]

When I lived there that Tuesday, Merkel, sold importing the entire turd world and Muslims to pay for the generous welfare and pension for native Germans. Now, 95% of all the turds are on welfare, and the 5% that work have jobs in the government or advocacy group making sure every imported turd can collect the maximum amount of welfare possible.

[AlaskaErik]

thats funny

are the germans laughing?

No, they're too busy working so all those freeloaders can live at their expense.

[Worldtraveler once upon a time]

---- "I have a 'Witzbuch für Kinder'. The Germans do have a sense of humor."

Of course they do. One can look back to Goethe's little rhymes, some very funny. We have a first edition by the marvelous Wilhelm Busch. Many more names could illustrate.

My bride and I speak German. The point of the joke about the shortest book in the German library being a collection of German humor is that it is a German joke. I heard it there. The point of this thread, of course, is not about German humor, but about the non-joke perpetrated by the idiot, Merkel, for her "wir schaffen es."

Islam specifically has a historical behavior properly called Hijrah, or Hegira, in which this supremacist ideology pretends to "immigrate" in Trojan horse fashion until.... Which is not funny. Western Leftists think they have found an ally in parasitic Islam, which will of course be once again proven tragically fallacious.

[dfwgator]

[Worldtraveler once upon a time]

If you don't know the 2015 film, it is darkly amusing:

Available through Amazon. We've the DVD, which is either "day-fow-day" or in English subtitles, "dee-vee-dee".....

:)

[dfwgator]

Found this one the other day.

The Rage of Painting - With The Austrian Painter
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NmjrfXO0mdk

(I was impressed that they seem to have used Hitler’s true speaking voice)

[Worldtraveler once upon a time]

Late night television in Germany for years and years ran old newsreels from the WWII era. ( Anecdote: One older and now deceased German used the verb, "conquer," to describe to me how Germany was 'conquered' in WWII. Shows there's different perspectives on things. eh? )

Lots of Hitler's speeches are available in newsreels these days. Much from radio -- Adolf Hitler — Appeal to the nation, July 15, 1932 [English subtitles]

I listened to just a little of it, to say the subtitles are pretty accurate. Interesting to hear this evil asshole speak. Colored in a light Austrian accent....

[Repealthe17thAmendment]

Germans are known for their lighthearted sense of humor.

My son-in-law is German, and here is one of the "jokes" he likes to tell.

Q: How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One

[TexasGator]

Punchline?

[dfwgator]

This is his true speaking voice, it was much deeper than I expected, from a meeting with Finnish Marshall Mannerheim.

The other thing about this, is how blunt Hitler was about the situation in Russia.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oET1WaG5sFk

[Worldtraveler once upon a time]

Thanks. I'd heard that conversation. It's good to go to original sources when available, to hear “from the horse's mouth.” And thankfully I can verify most of the translation. The notion that Hitler had one final breakdown is a bit naive, because that recording from 1942 shows a “what the hell” sort of awareness, sort of “what have we gotten ourselves into” moment.

History is a lot messier than "good guy, bad guy" dualism. Even some of our Founding Fathers "switched sides" for a short period to preserve family and property, as we learned in a recent presentation on the Revolutionary War. Simplifying history is a bit like simplifying geopolitics or business.

Mannerheim was an interesting figure in that time. The modern EU could take a lesson.....

[Worldtraveler once upon a time]

--- "My son-in-law is German, and here is one of the 'jokes' he likes to tell. Q: How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? A: One"

Ausgezeichnet!