Avoid bad breath, don't pick partners when drunk: ancient dating tips to find modern love

The Conversation ^ | July 3, 2025 | Konstantine Panegyres

[SunkenCiv]

• Ovid: The Poet and the Emperor [08/15/2020]

[SunkenCiv]

https://search.brave.com/search?q=%22The+Sweetness+of+Honey+and+the+Sting+of+Bees%22
https://www.abebooks.com/9781556706806/Sweetness-Honey-Sting-Bees-Book-1556706804/plp
https://www.bookcrossing.com/journal/1438776
https://books.google.fm/books/about/The_Sweetness_of_Honey_and_the_Sting_of.html?hl=en&id=sgXrPAAACAAJ
https://www.fantasticfiction.com/l/michelle-lovric/sweetness-of-honey-and-sting-of-bees.htm
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2240512.The_Sweetness_of_Honey_and_the_Sting_of_Bees
https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/the-sweetness-of-honey-and-the-sting-of-bees-a-book-of-love_michelle-lovric_nikiforos-doxiadis-mardas/1331297/

[SunkenCiv]

Thanks for the link.

[BenLurkin]

“don’t pick partners when drunk”

Wait. What?

[Antoninus]

Others lamented that they missed their opportunity for love. So the poet Pindar (6th–5th century BCE) wrote a poem regretting that he could not make the much younger Theoxenus his boyfriend:

Ah, the Greeks. Forever confusing sodomy for "love".

[ansel12]

Use a false name, always go to her place.

[Miami Rebel]

Anything that promotes readership of Ovid is a good thing!

[SunkenCiv]

If it weren't for Old Grand Dad, there would be many fewer old granddads.

[SunkenCiv]

Or borrow a friend’s place and give his name, that way it’ll be on the bell.

[Ronaldus Magnus III]

“Well, the girls all look prettier just about closing time”

[tumblindice]

When you’ve had too much to drink
There’s certain things to keep in mind
Like when you find your hand and underarms are bleeding
Your beer bottle might not have a twist off cap
And don’t ever go home with a woman they call Moose
Or Vince
And never bet that you can fit your head inside a glove compartment

Get drunk with dignity

[Red Badger]

Dang! That was my ‘Go To’ method back in the day!.................

[Red Badger]

Theoxenus ..........pronounce that slooooowly..............

[Vaduz]

Don’t pick partners when drunk

The bottle is mightier then the quiver
W.C. Fields

That fear feeling you get when you wake up the next morning after last nights pick up.

[P.O.E.]

Buddy of mine stole a handful of business cards from my desk.

Many a Monday morning phone call on my answering machine “why haven’t you called me” and the like.

[Political Junkie Too]

Ancient Greeks and Romans also had a lot to say about this subject.

What about Jimmy Buffet's "Honey, why don't we get drunk and screw?"

-PJ

[OldHarbor]

The Amazing Rhythm Aces- "Third Rate Romance" (with Lyrics)

[Albion Wilde]

...things did not always work out, and people had grievances against former lovers. One particularly famous invective was from the poet Martial (38–104 CE) to a woman called Manneia:

Manneia, your little dog licks your face and lips. Small wonder that a dog likes eating dung!

Hahahahhaaha!

[Seruzawa]

Here’s a strange ancient advice: Asketh Lazamatazus if he wouldst “hittest it”.

[nopardons]

Ovid’s THE ART OF LOVE covers it all.