70% of Divorces Initiated by Women – Here Are the Results

Intellectual Takeout ^ | May 20, 2025 | Annie Holmquist

[DoodleBob]

‘Tis the season for weddings, and chances are the next several weeks will find many of us sitting in a lovely venue, decked in our best, watching a man and a woman pledge themselves to one another for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health.

The good news is that more of these sweet couples may remain true to their vows. Statistics from the Census Bureau show that U.S. divorce rates have dropped from 10.0 in 2008 to 7.0 in 2022. Although that drop could be caused by other factors (such as increased cohabitation rates), it is an encouraging statistic.

What’s not encouraging, however, is the statistic showing which partner tends to initiate divorce. Data shows that roughly 70% of divorces are now initiated by women. Each of us can likely affirm this number just from our own circle of friends – indeed, most of the divorces I’ve known about in the last decade were more prone to be instigated by the wife than the husband.

That’s tragic, particularly since many of these divorces seem to stem from boredom or dissatisfaction with the partner rather than truly dangerous situations where the wife must leave the marriage for safety’s sake. What’s even more tragic is that these same women, in instigating divorce, often seem to ignore the effects their choice will have on their offspring.

Just how negative the effects of divorce are on children is shown in a new study from the National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER). The data presented only serves to underscore that divorce is a major blow to the stability of a child’s life … and the ripples of that instability will only spread as that child grows. Here are just a few of those negative effects:

• Median income in married-parent families registers around $70,000 per year. That drops to just over $40,000 for divorced-parent families.
• A decline in financial resources leads to other issues, one of which is less time with mom and dad, as both are forced to work more to cover costs. NBER finds that “mothers work 8 percent more hours after divorce, and fathers work 16 percent more after divorce.”
• Fewer resources also means poorer living situations, the report explains. “Even a decade later, children’s neighborhoods remain significantly below their pre-divorce quality.”
• This lack of time with parents and poorer living circumstances can naturally lead children to fall into bad company. Children from divorced homes experience a 63% increase in teen births, and “a 33 to 60 percent increase in incarceration likelihood” if they were between ages 5 and 20 when the divorce happened.

These are points of fact, scientifically presented by a leading research organization. Yet sadly, many seem to turn a blind eye to them, convincing themselves and others that their children will be far better off with divorced parents. Evidence of this tendency is seen in an X post highlighting the study where many commenters were left seemingly justifying divorce and trying to cast shade on the study’s results.

This reaction fits perfectly with what G. K. Chesterton said. “The definition of divorce, which concerns us here, is that it is the attempt to give respectability, and not liberty,” Chesterton wrote in “The Superstition of Divorce.”

Many women (and men, too) convince themselves that they will be free — free to live, laugh, and love as they want — if they only divorce their spouse and start fresh. But as the statistics above show, bondage, not liberty, is pretty much the assured outcome of divorce for both parents and especially children. And I would argue that this bondage extends beyond children to the nation as a whole.

Why is this?

“Marriage makes a small state within the state, which resists all such regimentation,” Chesterton writes.

That bond breaks all other bonds; that law is found stronger than all later and lesser laws. They desire the democracy to be sexually fluid, because the making of small nuclei is like the making of small nations. Like small nations, they are a nuisance to the mind of imperial scope. In short, what they fear, in the most literal sense, is home rule.

In essence, Chesterton is saying the family is a small nation, and the more we have of these tiny nations functioning properly and refusing to break apart, the more we as a large nation are able to resist tyranny, government overreach, and other breaches of our freedom.

It’s highly unpopular to question divorce these days simply because it’s an issue that affects many. None of us want to admit that our personal actions may have led to deleterious bondage being placed on many others. But if we want to push back on the tyranny and government overreach that has persisted in recent years, do we need to recognize that seemingly small, individual decisions – such as the decision to pursue divorce freely and fully – may be playing a larger part in the gradual loss of freedom the nation as a whole is experiencing?

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The republication of this article is made possible by The Fred & Rheta Skelton Center for Cultural Renewal. 

[metmom]

Preach it.

[Jamestown1630]

Argue it with the State.

I’m concerned with the feelings and intentions of the individuals involved.

[phil00071]

Statistics can be misleading. I know many women who divorced their husbands because the husband was cheating or had withdrawn emotionally.

[cherry]

Who initiates a divorce is an absolutely meaningless stat..

I imagine somebody has to do it and men usually won't admit failure ever and certainly many men refuse to take blame for anything.

some things in marriage are deal breakers...infidelity,porn,drugs,physical abuse,gambling,etc...somebody's got to take a stand,man or woman.

[nopardons]

No it didn't start in one generation at all. It goes back to HIP HOP, which was a knock off of "DOING' THE NUMBERS", in the Ghetto, which was the verbal face-off, between gangs.

And the "FLY GIRL" dancers were the beginnings of today's stupid, supposed dancing; though "TWERKING" began in black strip clubs.

And "FLY" comes from 100s of years old white gang/thug/thieving culture in the UK.

[lakecumberlandvet]

I completely agree with you.

[alexander_busek]

There are ways to slow a divorce initiated by a woman, if the husband WANTS to do so.

"Objection, Your Honor! Counsel is stating facts not in evidence!"

If bet that you could name five ways right off the top of your head!

Then why don't you?

Also: What ways are there for a woman to slow a divorce initiated by the husband?

Secondly: The stats in those two charts would be far more revealing if they were blended: Rather than "divorces per 1,000 of the general population" and "marriages per 1,000 of the general population," how about showing "divorces per marriage?" Maybe with a three-year time-lag?

Regards,

[rdcbn1]

“If you ask quite a few women why they divorced their husbands they really have no good answer.”

My mother divorced my father in 1974, when I was seven. In her later years, she expressed to me her profound regret for divorcing a perfectly good man. She also admitted that she initiated it, mostly because another women (neighbor) convinced her that she deserved better. She spent the next 30 years with a man who was most definitely not better, and insisted before her death that my father's surname be on her tombstone.

---

Frankly, I think you are on to something here.

I know a number of women who's relationship with their friends is based primarily on complaining about their husbands. It becomes an echo chamber of negativity that really becomes toxic.

[kelly4c]

Interesting read. Thanks for posting.

[Secret Agent Man]

Exactly.

[Secret Agent Man]

You can go simp somewhere else. You’re not impressing anyone here.

[Secret Agent Man]

What they dont include is the fact women will deliberately act a certain way towards men to finally make them snap and file for divorce, so they can appear as the victim of the husband divorcing them and breaking up the family.

Thats a large percentage of the men filing for divorce. It really is the woman who wanted the divorce, but didnt want to be the one who broke up the family, so they act in such a way that leads the guy to file.

Any everyone knows the kind of behavior I am talking about. You either experienced it yourself or saw a guy in your life experiencing the behavior.

[linMcHlp]

bttt

[newfreep]

Men & Women who cheat or drink but refuse to reform are despicable.

[fr_freak]

Everyone knows a guy who is not particularly attractive or wealthy, but many women are attracted to him. Why? Because he has mastered the art of showing women respect, appreciation and a sympathetic shoulder for support.

LOLOLOLOLOL

This advice ranks right up there with the food pyramid. Make sure you eat more cereal kids!

There are not-particularly-handsome men out there whom women find attractive, but it damn sure isn't because he's a "sympathetic shoulder". Any young man who listens to that garbage advice is going to end up right square in the dreaded Friend Zone.

[sit-rep]

perfect post...

[sit-rep]

My ex wanted to go on a trip every time i brought in extra money... we divorced because “we” didnt make enough money. the child support years later, every time I was arrested for rears, the chunk of money I paid to get out of jail, soon was spent on a trip for her and her new boyfriend.

I just fkng laughed...

[DoodleBob]

I didn’t know there was a he-man pro-adultery and alcoholism wing of FR.

90+ posts and lots of agreement.

[Sirius Lee]

10. Just waiting for the next, bigger boat to come by. Many women are just social climbers but won't jump ship until they can conveniently board whatever bigger yacht is near enough.

Hilarity ensues on those occasions when they jump ship and the other boat sails off before they can climb aboard.

[Theophilus]

“The pill” or hormonal birth control, is the primary culprit.