Posted on 05/21/2025 6:35:26 PM PDT by DoodleBob
‘Tis the season for weddings, and chances are the next several weeks will find many of us sitting in a lovely venue, decked in our best, watching a man and a woman pledge themselves to one another for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health.
The good news is that more of these sweet couples may remain true to their vows. Statistics from the Census Bureau show that U.S. divorce rates have dropped from 10.0 in 2008 to 7.0 in 2022. Although that drop could be caused by other factors (such as increased cohabitation rates), it is an encouraging statistic.
What’s not encouraging, however, is the statistic showing which partner tends to initiate divorce. Data shows that roughly 70% of divorces are now initiated by women. Each of us can likely affirm this number just from our own circle of friends – indeed, most of the divorces I’ve known about in the last decade were more prone to be instigated by the wife than the husband.
That’s tragic, particularly since many of these divorces seem to stem from boredom or dissatisfaction with the partner rather than truly dangerous situations where the wife must leave the marriage for safety’s sake. What’s even more tragic is that these same women, in instigating divorce, often seem to ignore the effects their choice will have on their offspring.
Just how negative the effects of divorce are on children is shown in a new study from the National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER). The data presented only serves to underscore that divorce is a major blow to the stability of a child’s life … and the ripples of that instability will only spread as that child grows. Here are just a few of those negative effects:
These are points of fact, scientifically presented by a leading research organization. Yet sadly, many seem to turn a blind eye to them, convincing themselves and others that their children will be far better off with divorced parents. Evidence of this tendency is seen in an X post highlighting the study where many commenters were left seemingly justifying divorce and trying to cast shade on the study’s results.
This reaction fits perfectly with what G. K. Chesterton said. “The definition of divorce, which concerns us here, is that it is the attempt to give respectability, and not liberty,” Chesterton wrote in “The Superstition of Divorce.”
Many women (and men, too) convince themselves that they will be free — free to live, laugh, and love as they want — if they only divorce their spouse and start fresh. But as the statistics above show, bondage, not liberty, is pretty much the assured outcome of divorce for both parents and especially children. And I would argue that this bondage extends beyond children to the nation as a whole.
Why is this?
“Marriage makes a small state within the state, which resists all such regimentation,” Chesterton writes.
That bond breaks all other bonds; that law is found stronger than all later and lesser laws. They desire the democracy to be sexually fluid, because the making of small nuclei is like the making of small nations. Like small nations, they are a nuisance to the mind of imperial scope. In short, what they fear, in the most literal sense, is home rule.
In essence, Chesterton is saying the family is a small nation, and the more we have of these tiny nations functioning properly and refusing to break apart, the more we as a large nation are able to resist tyranny, government overreach, and other breaches of our freedom.
It’s highly unpopular to question divorce these days simply because it’s an issue that affects many. None of us want to admit that our personal actions may have led to deleterious bondage being placed on many others. But if we want to push back on the tyranny and government overreach that has persisted in recent years, do we need to recognize that seemingly small, individual decisions – such as the decision to pursue divorce freely and fully – may be playing a larger part in the gradual loss of freedom the nation as a whole is experiencing?
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The republication of this article is made possible by The Fred & Rheta Skelton Center for Cultural Renewal.
“Not too hairy” - men can sometimes be taught to groom themselves if they are over abundant on the hair feature. Some of them may even welcome the information, though it should be delivered gently and in a friendly manner.
PS - One of my best friends met her husband on a Catholic dating website. Best decision she ever made.
You imagine that you know/understand what you're talking about; however, you really do NOT!
You don't understand WHY so many black women act and vote the way they do, nor WHY some black men do. Some unwed mothers get money from the men with whom they have progeny AND welfare of every kind.
Welfare or none, it is part and parcel of a subculture that YOU aren't a part of.
Though many blacks are now Conservatives and TRUMPERS, the majority of GHETTO BLACKS and rappers are still on the DEM PLANTATION, that has done NOTHING at all for them.
Do you even know anything at all about the new BLACKS HAVING "BLACK FATIGUE"? I bet that you've NEVER even heard of that.
The quote, “The family is a small nation, and the more we have of these tiny nations functioning properly and refusing to break apart, the more we as a large nation are able to resist tyranny, government overreach, and other breaches of our freedom,” is attributed to Annie Holmquist. This statement appears in an article published by 1819 News, where Holmquist discusses the societal importance of strong families in maintaining broader national liberty and resisting government overreach.
________________________________________
I always say: As goes the American Family; so goes America.
PROVE THAT!
Anybody here remember when All in the family kind of encouraged divorce. And then came Maude? Stuff like that crap encouraging women to hate men, ‘be independent’ what has that got them but to work a long hard work week and the kids are on their own.
Well some might think it’s a long time ago but that set the tone for what we have now.
I’m guessing you don’t see it this way, but those are probably the same exact reasons why men initiate divorce against their wives.
If it was Holy Matrimony, the state wouldn't be involved. It's a contract, one in which the state inserts itself as an unwelcome third partner.
This ghetto culture you speak of happened in one generation.
And it can be ended in one generation.
The illegitimacy rate for blacks in 1965 was 24%. Then The Great Society happened and by 2000 the rate was 70%.
And we can thank LBJ for that.
I hated All in the Family AND Maude, but you’re right. Both of those set the tone for where we are now.
The Great Society is just one of many reasons why LBJ was our worst president ever.
Worse than Obama and Biden.
I think this is the truth behind it all.
What America failed to recognize when Flip Wilson/Geraldine said “the devil made me do it,” is that God gave us free will.
Same thing with divorce. I understand Great Society, no-fault laws, etc. But blaming LBJ for divorce requires a repudiation of free will.
Which is pretty much what happened.
Right up there with Woodrow Wilson.
Oh, as I said at the top, I blame women AND men.
And yes those reasons apply to both camps.
I’m not a woman so I can’t speak for them. But men have a duty to…well…be men. That requires making tough decisions and taking tough action.
In divorce, that means fighting…fighting for family, love, and to live up to God’s will.
The exorcist Fr. Ripperger discusses the curse of Adam (irresponsibility & unwillingness to suffer) and the curse of Eve (desire to control husbands). Delving deeper…. https://robthefob.blogspot.com/2017/07/the-crisis-of-effeminacy-and-how-to.html
Effeminacy as defined by St. Thomas Aquinas is “an unwillingness to put aside one’s pleasure in order to pursue what is arduous (difficult).”
SLOTH is an aversion to what is hard
EFFEMINACY is an attachment to what is pleasurable.
One of the sins of Adam was inept joy. His lower appetite took delight in the fact that the fruit of the tree was pleasing. He knew the command not to eat (reason). If I am to do the right thing, I need to die to myself and not touch it. He allows the lower appetite to take control contrary to reason.
A supernatural gift before the Fall was INTEGRITY—the lower appetites were subject to reason. The appetites after the Fall gained a life of their own, and man ended up pursuing pleasure at the expense of reason.
A second problem in the Fall was that Eve eats the fruit, gives to Adam, essentially saying “take my lead” trying to take control. After the Fall, women get stuck with the problem of trying to control their husbands. This sets up a dynamic of the wife ruling the roost at home. Man just wants peace and does what she wants to attain it.
Adam for his part got stuck with the problem of not wanting to be separated from his wife. He chose the pleasure of being around his wife rather than listening to God and obeying his command. He ate the fruit, and rather than accept responsibility he half-blames his wife and half blames God.
Part of effeminacy is choosing the pleasure of not having to take responsibility for something. This is pandemic in most men today (avoiding taking a beating for doing wrong). Blaming his wife was another form of effeminacy.
If you are effeminate, your wife will never respect you or be happy with you. The God-ordered natural inclination for woman is to subordinate to right authority.
Our culture is TOO EASY, TOO SIMPLISTIC, and TOO PLEASURABLE for men. Most jobs are sitting at a computer rather than hard work. Technology brings us a pleasure in its use. It is a tool but if used to regularly, becomes a problem. Nonstop use of technology by boys today is softening them, overstimulating, and makes effeminate since they have no control of their appetites
*snicker*
1st wife divorced me. no real reason at all..
married to my 2nd wife for 35 yrs till she passed away this past march.
guess i married wrong the 1at time.
Interesting post. Thanks for your insights.
With LOTS of butter.
Yum!
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