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10 Jobs Being Eliminated At Pixar
Babylon Bee ^ | May 23, 2024 | Staff

Posted on 05/26/2024 6:05:27 AM PDT by Twotone

Times are tough at Disney subsidiaries, with even the one-time animation powerhouse Pixar being forced to make significant layoffs. With so much happening, knowing just which positions are being done away with can be helpful.

The Babylon Bee has obtained the inside scoop and put together the following list of jobs being eliminated at Pixar:

1. Assistant Grooming Director: Though the lead Grooming Director still has a job, he will now have to groom without an assistant.

2. Gay Cartoon Intimacy Coordinator: In charge of overseeing all gay cartoon love scenes.

3. Senior Lame Narrative Developer: This was the person who made sure all stories were completely, hopelessly lame.

4. Fat And Ugly Character Representation Consultant: Now there will be no one to ensure the characters are fat and ugly.

5. Chief Kink Officer: No one was more integral in the effort to completely screw up the minds of children.

6. Cultural Appropriation Risk Assessor: With this job gone, there is a far better chance that a character will recklessly appropriate someone's culture.

7. Puberty Blocker Vending Machine Refiller: All break rooms and lobbies at Pixar will need to find new sources for artificial hormone alterations.

8. Caucasian Shamer: Berating all white people will now be a job shared by the entire company.

9. Chief Disabled Queer BIPOC Trans Communist Satan Representation Officer: The outgoing CDQBTCSRO will easily find a spot at another movie studio.

10. Entire Department of Good Ideas: Though this department has been empty for years, they have officially done away with it.

It may be difficult to get any agenda-driven movies made without the jobs listed above, but Pixar will probably keep trying anyway.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; disney; pixar

1 posted on 05/26/2024 6:05:27 AM PDT by Twotone
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To: Twotone

You can eliminate them all as far as I’m concerned. Nothing but woke garbage. Back when we were growing up cartoons were hand painted in sheets of celluloid and shot one frame at a time. It took a team of animators to put one together. Now one bedwetting loser in his mamas basement can do it with a computer.


2 posted on 05/26/2024 6:13:21 AM PDT by pawpawrick (I had a life once but my job ate it)
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To: Twotone

The Babylon Bee - Where satire becomes truth


3 posted on 05/26/2024 6:17:11 AM PDT by Fai Mao ( Starve the Beast and steal its food.)
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To: Twotone

#10 isn’t satire ๐Ÿ˜


4 posted on 05/26/2024 6:18:17 AM PDT by V_TWIN (America...so great even the people that hate it refuse to leave!)
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To: Twotone

Itโ€™s gotta be fun working there. For the Babylon Bee, that is!๐Ÿ˜„


5 posted on 05/26/2024 6:41:44 AM PDT by telescope115 (I NEED MY SPACE!!! ๐Ÿ”ญ)
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To: Twotone
Sad: Laid-Off Pixar Lamp Gets Job Warming Fries At McDonald's


6 posted on 05/26/2024 6:48:13 AM PDT by Carl Vehse
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To: Twotone
The Bee did it again - Stung Disney!

Someone should start a Conservative Animation Studio...

7 posted on 05/26/2024 7:19:56 AM PDT by Deplorable American1776 (Guns don't kill people, LIBERALS DO!! Support the Second Amendment...)
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To: Carl Vehse

Now, thatโ€™s good.


8 posted on 05/26/2024 8:42:50 AM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: Twotone

Bookmark


9 posted on 05/26/2024 9:24:41 AM PDT by aquila48 (Do not let them make you "care" ! Guilting you is how they control you. )
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