Posted on 10/25/2023 1:41:00 PM PDT by grundle
I wasn’t planning on grandchildren for at least another five years, but my son came home at age 22 and informed me that he was going to be a father. I am not a fan of his girlfriend at all; there is just something about her that makes me not trust her. I tried to communicate this to my son, but he is blinded by her beauty, among other things, and has never been able to hear what I have to say about her.
Now that the baby has arrived, my son truly has blinders on. He is so in love with his baby boy that the idea of getting a paternity test seems pointless to him. I told him that he should get it just to remove all doubt that the baby might not be his. They have had plenty of heated arguments while she was pregnant, and she is guilty of spewing comments about the baby not being his. My son assures me that she only has said those things out of anger and that the baby is most certainly his.
I wasn’t planning on grandchildren for at least another five years, but my son came home at age 22 and informed me that he was going to be a father. I am not a fan of his girlfriend at all; there is just something about her that makes me not trust her. I tried to communicate this to my son, but he is blinded by her beauty, among other things, and has never been able to hear what I have to say about her.
Now that the baby has arrived, my son truly has blinders on. He is so in love with his baby boy that the idea of getting a paternity test seems pointless to him. I told him that he should get it just to remove all doubt that the baby might not be his. They have had plenty of heated arguments while she was pregnant, and she is guilty of spewing comments about the baby not being his. My son assures me that she only has said those things out of anger and that the baby is most certainly his.
I told my son that he needs to be reimbursed for any and all monies he spent on her prenatal care. I personally want the money back for what we spent on throwing her a baby shower and on big-ticket items we bought, like the car seat, crib, and pack-and-play. My son is emotionally scarred and can’t think straight right now, so it is my job to make sure he is asking for the right things. Is it petty to demand money back for what my son and I spent on a child that’s not his?
It is petty. Li’l baby has no say, and the stuff and $$ are just things. Be merciful, part as amicably as possible, move on.
How do you know it’s dad, not mom?
" Wife's fine, kids are retarded" was always the comeback to that one.
Seriously, the helicoter parents(s) need to forget the money spent and concentrate on cutting all legal and monetary ties to her and the child.
The first thing he need to do is hire a lawyer to petition the court to remove his name as the child’s father to avoid support payments.
****
Yes
There’s a lot to that process.
I was named the father of a child from a woman I literally never met. She finally admitted in a deposition that she saw me in the newspaper and wanted a rich father.
The child support was easily resolved with DNA, but spent a crapload on lawyers getting my name off the birth certificate.
But this parent needs to understand, the son is already in love with the baby. He may keep paying for the baby.
Agreed regarding fraud, but that would have been hard to know prior to the paternity test given sex with both men along with the mother’s unambiguous statements regarding the cheating. The gifts were effectively given in the context of knowing about the possibility of cheating... I presume given no hard time line of events was provided.
Can he sue for fraud?
There were some stories that men were named as potential fathers for children. The state tries to find the man, but if the man doesn’t respond in time, even if he never received notice, he is considered the legally responsible party. I think there was at least one case where a man who had never even slept with the woman was forced to pay.
If they were living together at time of birth and he allowed his name to be on the birth certificate, provided care and support before and after the birth, it will be an uphill battle. His actions imply his acceptance. As an example, she could say he knew it wasn’t his baby but still wanted to be considered the father, as indicated by the BC.
In this day of social media revenge is a dish that need not be served cold....
;-)
<>Quick question, did they do the paternity test and is or is he not the father?<>
Quick answer, read before posting.
Works every time.
But if she had never admitted it, there’s a chance you’d have had to pay?
Like something out of Jerry Springer - or one of those daytime radio jocks.
A very tough lesson I’ve never really learned. I was raised to believe that women were honest, righteous, and generally above reproach. Not very realistic, but that early conditioning isn’t easy to shake.
Can he sue the natural father?
NO!!!!!!
The father SIGNS the birth certificate.
Is there any other are of the law, where going forward because you believed a fraud means the person who committed the fraud is off the hook?
Yeah, I was thinking he’d better hire a bulldog of an attorney to get this straightened out.
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