Posted on 10/25/2023 1:41:00 PM PDT by grundle
I wasn’t planning on grandchildren for at least another five years, but my son came home at age 22 and informed me that he was going to be a father. I am not a fan of his girlfriend at all; there is just something about her that makes me not trust her. I tried to communicate this to my son, but he is blinded by her beauty, among other things, and has never been able to hear what I have to say about her.
Now that the baby has arrived, my son truly has blinders on. He is so in love with his baby boy that the idea of getting a paternity test seems pointless to him. I told him that he should get it just to remove all doubt that the baby might not be his. They have had plenty of heated arguments while she was pregnant, and she is guilty of spewing comments about the baby not being his. My son assures me that she only has said those things out of anger and that the baby is most certainly his.
I wasn’t planning on grandchildren for at least another five years, but my son came home at age 22 and informed me that he was going to be a father. I am not a fan of his girlfriend at all; there is just something about her that makes me not trust her. I tried to communicate this to my son, but he is blinded by her beauty, among other things, and has never been able to hear what I have to say about her.
Now that the baby has arrived, my son truly has blinders on. He is so in love with his baby boy that the idea of getting a paternity test seems pointless to him. I told him that he should get it just to remove all doubt that the baby might not be his. They have had plenty of heated arguments while she was pregnant, and she is guilty of spewing comments about the baby not being his. My son assures me that she only has said those things out of anger and that the baby is most certainly his.
I told my son that he needs to be reimbursed for any and all monies he spent on her prenatal care. I personally want the money back for what we spent on throwing her a baby shower and on big-ticket items we bought, like the car seat, crib, and pack-and-play. My son is emotionally scarred and can’t think straight right now, so it is my job to make sure he is asking for the right things. Is it petty to demand money back for what my son and I spent on a child that’s not his?
I had a dog and his name was BINGO.
I have even heard more than one story of men having to pay child support simply because each had been named as the father on a birth certificate, even though they had never acknowledged paternity and paternity testing showed that they were not the fathers of the children in question.
Perhaps those stories were not true, but I wouldn’t put anything past the courts.
i think a paternity test needs to be performed on every baby. In this day and age
Because women NEVER lie. And of course they NEVER cheat.
If he was married he would probably get hamstrung for child support even though it's not even his child. Is this a great country or what.
you old fuddy duddy :)
Was this letter written by a dad? Sounded like a woman wrote it.
“...petition the court to remove his name as the child’s father to avoid support payments.”
In this day and age, a judge may...or may not...be persuaded by that. Haven’t we seen stories RE a judge forcing the non-father to make child support payments?
“Sorry, son. Your wife may’ve been rabbiting around on you during your marriage. And DNA shows the child is not yours. But, it looks like you’re the one left holding the bag, so... I rule for the ex-wife.”
Is his name on the birth certificate?
If the woman doesn’t have any money no lawyer will even take the case. He’s looking at paying the bills for hours and court fees only to end up with a judgement that will never be collected, if a lawyer will take it.
What he should be worried about is being stuck with the childcare and alimony payments for a kid that isn’t his. That does happen. He’ll need a lawyer no matter what he does.
Just chalk it up as a life lesson
“Helicopter mom if there ever was one…”
CH-53k or a Chinook. We are talking heavy lift.
If the young man’s name made it onto the birth certificate he’s screwed. He would have to petition in court to get his name off and many times the judge will say no, since the “father” already accepted responsibility.
Ok, that made me chuckle. Well done.
Thanks. I was like- Something is missing here. Read it multiple times and could not figure out how we got to the last paragraph.
The son may not be the baby’s father, but due to his close relationship with the mother, he’s going to get screwed with baby payments.
And I think that is completely wrong. Some families do prenups some don’t. It’s choice just like paternity tests. If you want one take the heat don’t hide behind making everyone else get one. I want the Government out of my life not the nanny state dotting the i’s & crossing the t’s.
In most states, if his name is on the birth certificate he only has a certain amount of time to challenge paternity and get his name removed, usually about a year. After that point, he is on the hook for support, even though he can prove the child is not his. Just having the DNA test in hand is not enough, he has to get a court to remove him as parent.
Anger understood. But, drop it. Cut all ties and never think about this woman again.
BTW, tell your son this is an object lesson and to keep his drawers pulled up always until marriage.
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