Posted on 04/26/2022 3:40:53 AM PDT by sodpoodle
#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my German Shepherd.
# 9. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15% isn't.
# 8. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.
# 7. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.
# 6. I vote Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves. I am also thankful that we have a 911 service that gets police to your home in order to identify your body after a home invasion.
# 5. I vote Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive and comfy.
# 4. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we should take away Social Security from those who paid into it.
# 3. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrat Party sees fit.
# 2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.
...And, the #1 reason I vote Democrat is because I think it's better to pay $billions$ for oil to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle, gopher, or fish here in America. We don't care about the beetles, gophers, or fish in those other countries.
Things never change!
11. I vote democrat because I love poverty more than prosperity.
I seriesly doubt Letterman wrote these.
Probably not - all comedians/celebrities have writers. They just deliver the lines.
Because believing that eating a few fewer cheeseburgers will magically change the weather can’t possibly be a mental illness.
Letterman is a leftist, so this doesn’t sound like him.
And don’t forget this one...
I vote democrat because my father did and his father did.
You’ve got that right - he’s a dumb ass libtard to the point he wouldn’t be caught dead saying these things no matter how much truth or humor in it 🤪
I would change that to “I love POWER more than prosperity.”
I even doubt Letterman would embrace them as written, let alone allow them to be associated with his name.
My parent vote democrat because they’re dead
” I vote democrat because it is a sure path to Hell when I die.”
letterman would have never said those. He is a leftwing lunatic.
I never watched more than a few minutes of Letterman, but I seem to remember there was a regular top 10 segment. Someone is just borrowing the concept.
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/lettermandate/
Not that Snopes is trustworthy, but the link does provide further material for research
I vote democrat hoping for one of those tit Burisma jobs!
Oh noes!!!! You mean this is a spoof? Gosh I’d never have known
Erma Lawd. Do you not recognize satire?
Years ago I liked Letterman. I think he got more lefty as the years went by. I was always pretty conservative, but as a young adult perhaps his views didn’t seem to bad.
But I really think he just got worse and cranky in his old age. Back in the day he poked a lot of fun at everybody - including the Clintons.
Spam
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