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My organization has a “Men’s Forum”
Ask a Manager ^ | 4-11-22 | Alison Green

Posted on 04/11/2022 1:06:08 PM PDT by Brookhaven

My organization recently sent out an email announcing its annual “Men’s Forum” and I immediately felt icky about it. To me, it feels different than a women’s forum or an ERG for minorities because it focuses on a group that, historically, is not marginalized. For context, I work in finance which has a history of “the good old boys club.” The email even mentions “men and their allies” which also feels wrong to me.

Ick, yes. What is the event’s mission? Unless it’s to be an ally to women and other marginalized groups in your field or office, what exactly is the need it’s responding to? Affinity groups exist to help demographics that have been systemically marginalized and kept out of spaces controlled by the dominant group. The point is to level the playing field in places where it’s unbalanced and good lord, that’s not men in finance.

If this “Men’s Forum” exists to provide special networking or development opportunities to men, it’s hard to see it as anything other than a hostile response to similar efforts for women and people of color.


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: culturewars; men; mensgroup; society; workplace
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From the comments:

Totally! Men deserve a safe space to talk about how hard it is being paid better and what it’s like to fail up and the burden of manhood in general. /s

Men already have an affinity group and have for basically all of Western history. It’s called “the Patriarchy.”

Yeah, you COULD do a men’s group that was actually helpful for men in terms of dealing with toxic masculinity...

...a men’s affinity group would be an important part of DEI work IF the work of the group is to learn about systemic patriarchy and how men have internalized that; how patriarchy and toxic masculinity are influencing the company culture; how to be better allies to women and non-binary folks; etc. The group should hold itself accountable to the women’s affinity group. The work of undoing patriarchy is men’s to do.

Most companies already have two men’s groups – the C suite and the board.

People who belong to a dominant group, and react to a historically oppressed group trying to create support structures by saying THEY CAN’T HAVE ONE IF I DON’T GET ONE TOO are 100% the problem...

I suspect the mens forum creator is an incel...

They [men] DO have such a forum – it’s called the workplace.

1 posted on 04/11/2022 1:06:08 PM PDT by Brookhaven
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To: Brookhaven

Its a trap.


2 posted on 04/11/2022 1:08:05 PM PDT by IC Ken
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To: Brookhaven
...and I immediately felt icky about it.

Then you're in the wrong forum..........................

3 posted on 04/11/2022 1:08:23 PM PDT by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegal aliens are put up in hotels.....................)
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To: Brookhaven

I am old school, if you can’t swap out the group, such as with Whiteor men, this. It is wrong.


4 posted on 04/11/2022 1:08:35 PM PDT by Reno89519 (FJB. Respect America, Embrace America, Buy American, Hire American.)
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To: IC Ken
"Its a trap."

Bingo!

5 posted on 04/11/2022 1:10:14 PM PDT by Tell It Right (1st Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: Brookhaven
........what exactly is the need it’s responding to?

Perhaps a men's forum is to help other men respond to toxic women.

6 posted on 04/11/2022 1:11:22 PM PDT by jimtorr
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To: Brookhaven

This is so horrible, I can forsee posts for stuff like

does anyone want to go bowling and have beer and stuff on friday after work ?

I have a boat, who wants to go to fish lake saturday morning ?

I have extra tickets to the football game Sunday, first response gets them.


7 posted on 04/11/2022 1:12:23 PM PDT by algore
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To: Brookhaven

The only group institutionally discriminated against in the US today are white males.


8 posted on 04/11/2022 1:15:16 PM PDT by fruser1
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To: Brookhaven

Well, for goodness sake! Go to the meeting and talk about fast cars, guns, and camping gear.


9 posted on 04/11/2022 1:15:32 PM PDT by GingisK
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To: Brookhaven
I just spent my diversity brain washing listening to Jocko Willink and NC Scout.

Hilariously, I passed both tests by selecting the stupidist answers provided.

Men need to return to being men.
10 posted on 04/11/2022 1:18:44 PM PDT by farming pharmer (fork you :(){ :|:& };:)
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To: Brookhaven

Unless it involves beer and sports, don’t bother... you can feel “icky” all by yourself.


11 posted on 04/11/2022 1:19:23 PM PDT by Demiurge2 (Define your terms!)
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To: Brookhaven

“the burden of manhood in general.”

Protecting the fort from attacking Injuns, having to stand up in public when you got a rock-hard boner, trying to figure out WTF she’s upset about now, always being in the mood when she’s not, kids asking a never-ending stream of questions when you just sat down to eat after working all day, vying for attention and hitting each other when you’re trying to drive, etc., etc. Wanting newer and better power tools...


12 posted on 04/11/2022 1:19:40 PM PDT by Eleutheria5 (January 6, worst assault on democracy since the Reichstag Fire)
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To: IC Ken
Its a trap.

Yup.

"Hey, there's this one thing that women do, that really annoys me ..."

"Excuse me sir, HR is on the line ..."

13 posted on 04/11/2022 1:20:54 PM PDT by ClearCase_guy (It's hard to "Believe all women" when judges say "I don't know what a woman is".)
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To: Eleutheria5

And what about Native American men. They always have to attack forts...ahem...manned by white men. They never get to stop the messenger from reaching the cavalry, and always have to retreat at the end of the movie. They don’t even get any good lines, just war whoops. They’re...extras.


14 posted on 04/11/2022 1:23:56 PM PDT by Eleutheria5 (January 6, worst assault on democracy since the Reichstag Fire)
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To: Brookhaven

Garbage like this feels icky to me, and I don’t like ick.

Besides, if there’s no definition of woman, then there’s none for man either. So all this is nonsense.

Does the evil male patriarch oppressor become a wonderful, kind, loving, victim if he declares he’s a trans woman?

Insanity breeds insanity.


15 posted on 04/11/2022 1:26:29 PM PDT by I want the USA back (The further a society drifts from the truth, the more it will hate those that speak it.)
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To: GingisK

And hot women.


16 posted on 04/11/2022 1:27:26 PM PDT by libh8er
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To: Brookhaven
Does your Men's Group speakers include Sergeant Bullet? It may be too icky for you!


17 posted on 04/11/2022 1:27:42 PM PDT by \/\/ayne (I regret that I have but one subscription cancellation notice to give to my local newspaper)
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To: fruser1

***The only group institutionally discriminated against in the US today are white males****

True!!!!!

Add white heterosexual, working husbands and fathers.


18 posted on 04/11/2022 1:27:54 PM PDT by sodpoodle (Life is prickly, carry tweezers.)
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To: Brookhaven

This is toxic femininity


19 posted on 04/11/2022 1:28:11 PM PDT by FLT-bird
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To: Brookhaven
My organization recently sent out an email announcing its annual “Men’s Forum” and I immediately felt icky about it.

The icky person who wrote this has serious woketardian mental problems and needs to see a shrink as soon as possible or check in at the nearest loony bin.

20 posted on 04/11/2022 1:30:53 PM PDT by Carl Vehse (A proud member of the LGBFJB community)
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