Posted on 09/03/2020 1:08:14 PM PDT by BipolarBob
SAN FRANCISCO, CANancy Pelosi was minding her own business this week when a salon owner called her and said in a gravelly voice, "Listen, toots -- I got a proposition for ya." The salon owner then explained how she wanted her to come in to get a perm, absolutely free. "It's a great deal -- no strings attached. No funny business. Take it or leave it. Come around back. No cops."
Pelosi showed up for the appointment but felt uneasy from the beginning since the salon owner wore a shirt saying "I HATE NANCY PELOSI." But despite her misgivings, she continued on, really needing to get her hair done and her skin tightened.
Just as her head was being dipped in the bowl, Pelosi noticed one of the hair stylists pressing a button labeled "SUMMON POLICE TO FRAME A POLITICIAN" under the counter. The Speaker of the House leaped to her feet and made a break for it, screaming for her chauffeur to start the car.
"Step on it, Bugsy!" she shouted at her getaway driver. "It's a setup! The popo's comin' in hot!" The hair stylist almost nabbed her, but Pelosi pushed over a rack of shampoos and conditioners, slowing down her pursuers just in time for her to leap into the back seat of her car.
A police car came screaming around the corner just as she and her driver peeled out, taking a hard right down a nearby alleyway. The police officer riddled the back of her car with bullets from his Tommy gun before Pelosi narrowly managed to escape by driving off the end of the docks, where her car turned into a steampunk submersible and she got away scot-free.
The Babylon Bee has really been on fire lately, they post more funny articles in a day than The Onion does in a year. And BB is just a couple of guys with a website whereas the Onion has a huge stable of writers and are backed by billionaires.
I hope someone can put Nazi Pelosi’s face on the admiral in the Star Wars movie declaring, “It’s a trap!”
She walked in on her own. There was no set up. She simply got caught being a phoney!
Just when you think the Bee cant get any better, the Bee gets better.
Pelosi’s actions and accusations remind me of a pedophiles reaction to getting caught showing up at a house with a six pack of wine coolers and condoms to meet what they thought was a kid they meet on line.
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