Posted on 04/07/2020 7:03:26 PM PDT by xp38
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Trump excitedly unveiled his latest improvements to the White House Press Briefing Room at Monday night's press conference: ejection seats.
Controlled by a panel on Trump's podium, the ejection seats allow him to instantly send any White House reporter on a free trip to somewhere a few hundred yards down Pennsylvania Avenue. Any journalist parroting Chinese propaganda, insulting the president, or asking a question without referring to Trump as "His Majesty Donald Trump May He Live Forever" is likely to get a free flight courtesy of the White House.
"Mr. President, why do you hate AmericaaaaaaaaAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" screamed one reporter as Trump solemnly pressed a button and sent her rocketing through the roof. Stunned journalists stared in shock at their colleague soaring hundreds of feet into the air. They were speechless, which was a "welcome change" according to sources.
Jim Acosta tried to chime in next, but Trump had already pushed his button before he got any words out. "Looks like Jim Acosta's blasting off agaaaaaaaaain!!!!" the CNN reporter cried as he disappeared in a little twinkle in the sky.
"Anyone else?" Trump asked quietly, looking around the room but not seeing any hands go up. "Great. Then we'll end this shindig early. Tremendous job out there, today, journalists. You're all American heroes."
I wish. :D
It must not apply to all liars in the press, the story is still here.
Got to give it up for the Bee.
Is This a Joke!?
/S
The trap door leading to the bone stripper in “Nothing but Trouble” would be a better alternative.
Certainly not for Q.....see post 2 :)
That would be ‘must see tv’.
But maybe Fauci can randomly pass out parachutes and identical looking backpacks to do the double blind trial. It should only take a few hundred samples to get a statistically significant trial.
Oh, forget random. Everyone gets a backpack.
DJT “I’d like to start this Q&A by saying Good-bye to the journalist here”.
If they don't like the question(s) from WH pool of reporters, WEEEeeeee, there goes Acosta, and esp. that fat broad Alcindor. Thinking about it, ejection seats should be built strong enough even for the likes of Alcindor....
That would generate a HUGE amount of money for corona virus (or small business) relief fund.
That would be hilarious.
The girly men would scream louder than the women.
about time.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.