Posted on 02/21/2020 10:31:38 AM PST by Forgiven_Sinner
LAS VEGAS, NV—Presidential candidate Mike Bloomberg took quite a beating in last night's debate and was rushed to a nearby Las Vegas hospital. Of course, a normal-sized hospital and normal-sized ambulance are far too large for the miniature billionaire, so he was rushed to a very tiny hospital in a very tiny ambulance.
Bloomberg was quickly wheeled out to a Hot Wheels ambulance on a cute little stretcher where he was then driven to The Las Vegas Center For People Who Need Medical Attention And Want To Get Some Emergency Care Too, which is small enough to be a "hospital for ants."
The ambulance was nearly run over by real cars on the way, but Bloomberg's tiny driver is an expert and managed to weave his way through traffic in a wacky action sequence "like in Stuart Little or something."
"He's recovering nicely in a matchbox," sources at the hospital said. "He is still pretty tender, but we managed to get him to eat some little breadcrumbs and a very small soup originally designed for Polly Pocket."
Oh This is Evil...
But funny
Bloomie did well in the debate, he just came up a little short, that’s all.
fortunately his hospital bill was also very small- poor guy
And the bandage on his butt was the result of a treadmill malfunction.
I didn’t think it was that funny. Maybe if the ambulance had been the DNC Clown Car it might have been a little funnier.
I see what you did there.
They’re making a movie of the debate. It’s called Get Shorty.
> Bloomie did well in the debate, he just came up a little short, that’s all. <
I agree. He just made a few tiny mistakes. I for one refuse to look down at him.
Some nice “Zoolander” in there.
Was he treated by a tiny physician?
Bloomberg’s campaign song is Randy Newman’s “Short People”.
Did they use the short operating table?
Candidates standing on boxes is not an uncommon practice. In many debates involving candidates with large differences in height, shorter candidates are supplied boxes to stand on to make the candidates appear closer to the same height.
Julian Castro is standing on a box in an attempt to make him look taller on the #DemocraticDebate stage pic.twitter.com/ZhTWUwncnB
— Washington Examiner (@dcexaminer) September 13, 2019
I heard they gave him two baby asprin and sent him home.
I heard he started crying when they tried to inject him with antibiotics, but the doctor distracted him with some funny faces, and he got over it pretty quickly once they gave him a lollipop.
That would look like a Cello next to Bloomberg....
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