Academic questioned by American Airlines officials for doing math on plane

Technically Incorrect: An Ivy League expert in search theory says the math he was writing may have been mistaken by a passenger for some sort of code, possibly terroristic. Oh, and he has dark skin.

Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.

Would you be able to tell it apart from, say, things that terrorists write while on planes?

The question emerges after an Ivy League academic was questioned by American Airlines staff when a flight returned to the gate at Philadelphia airport Thursday, ostensibly because a passenger felt ill.

As The Washington Post reports, Guido Menzio was sitting on flight 3950 scribbling away, waiting for it to take off.

He told the Post that the female passenger next to him tried a little small talk. He didn't show great interest in this.

The passenger told a member of the cabin crew she suddenly felt ill. After some time, she apparently said she was now OK to fly. Still the plane returned to the gate.

There, says Menzio, he was met by a security agent who explained that he was under suspicion of being a terrorist.

It seems the passenger had been concerned about his writings -- though not just his writings, one suspects.

Guido Menzio is associate professor in the department of Economics at the University of Pennsylvania. One of his specialties is search theory. He was on his way to give a talk in Quebec.

Oh, and he has slightly darker skin. But, as his name suggests, he's Italian -- not, well, whatever other nationality bad people are supposed to be.

He says he was treated with respect at all times and allowed back on the plane, but the female passenger never reappeared.

American Airlines told me that Menzio had been met back at the gate first by a customer service manager and then by a corporate security officer. Sometimes, these are American Airlines employees, but sometimes they are contractors.

"A passenger on AE3950, operated by Air Wisconsin, expressed concerns with another customer's behavior," an American Airlines spokesman told me. "After reviewing the situation, the captain determined the flight should continue. We apologize to our customers for the delay."

Menzio told the Post that the captain seemed embarrassed, while Menzio himself was bemused. Had they thought he was writing, say Arabic? And what if he had been?

American Airlines didn't characterize Menzio being questioned as an interrogation -- as was suggested by the Post's headline. Instead, the standard company procedure is, whenever one passenger complains about another, to either reseat one of the passengers or investigate further.

Menzio told the Post he showed the American Airlines officials his calculations. They were about menu pricing.

He added, however, that he sensed in this incident an expression of our current times.

"What might prevent an epidemic of paranoia?" he asked the Post. "It is hard not to recognize in this incident the ethos of [Donald] Trump's voting base."

Some might wonder whether terrorists really would sit on planes writing potentially suspicious things in plain view.

Some might also wonder whether a passenger might fail to realize the difference between some sort of menacing writing (what does that look like?) and, say, a differential equation.

Too many people, however, seem scared of "the other," whatever that means to them. Too many people believe in "better safe than sorry" to a degree that "safe" means "to be with people only like me."

It seems that math may be "the other." Which is strange, given how much math is now central to everything we do and every part of the technology we inhabit.

More proof of that insidious Global conspiracy Terrorist Al-Gebra! From the most unimpeachable source ever, the Unencyclopedia Wiki, which tells us all about this terrible group of terrorists:

Al-Gebra

Al-Gebra is a terrorist movement headed up by the leader known as Osum of Bin Adden which has reportedly infiltrated American schools. It began at the undergraduate level and has spread to secondary schools, according to US Attorney General John Ashcroft. Favored targets are said to include homomorphics and people living in polynomial relationships. Academics dismiss the Ashcroft's accusations as pandering to the lowest common denominator of anti-Arab prejudice.

Al-Gebra terrorist, attempting to trisect an angle.

History

Early Organization

Al-Gebra has a long history, dating back to before Jesus Christ was born.
According to former member Al-Culus, the organization was originally founded in about 750 AD, at the peak of the Islamic golden age. They taught math with a religious conviction; so much so that students who failed were put to death.
The group then disappeared around 1250 AD; around the time the Mongols invaded the Caliphate.
Remergence

Al-Gebra is then said to have resurfaced in Renaissance-era Europe, though with less extreme practices, as a secret organization that whispered secrets to the great scientists of the time, such as Sir Issac Newton and Galileo. By the 1700s, they had infiltrated nearly all of Europe's educational institutions, though they had lost most of their influence in the Islamic world.

Modern Day

The web of deception was first uncovered at New York's Kennedy Airport when an individual claiming to be a school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, protractor, set square, slide rule and calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General John Ashcroft, said he believes the man is:

“ ...A member of the notorious al Gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI for carrying weapons of math instruction. ”

A SINE reveals that Al-Gebra uses use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', and the CIA has determined they belong to an axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. Field agents are evaluating rumored links with ring-leaders in the French defunctional Action Direct group. At a recent press conference, President Bush assured Americans that the federal government is working hard to find a solution to this problem.

It is commonly used as a Method of Severe Torture [M.S.T] for young adults between the ages of 12-18. This torture occurs at public school, more commonly known as Hell.

The Al-Gebra are known to set ordered pairs off on various coordinates. Which we can only assume are explosive. Linear expressions are often used to imitate enemies.

Known Members

Suspected members of Al-Gebra (math teachers and nerds) are being sent to interrogation chambers run by professional interrogators (failing math students).

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.