Time for a joke...

[Vanders9]

A fleeing Taliban terrorist, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance.

Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the mirage, only to find a very frail little old Jewish man standing at a small makeshift display rack selling ties.

The Taliban terrorist asked, "Do you have water?"

The Jewish man replied, "I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $5."

The Taliban shouted hysterically, "Idiot Infidel! I do not need such an over-priced western adornment. I spit on your ties. I need water!"

"Sorry, I have none, just ties – pure silk, and only $5."

"Pahh! A curse on your ties! I should wrap one around your scrawny little neck and choke the life out of you! But I must conserve my energy and find water!"

"Okay," said the little old Jewish man. "It does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie from me, or that you hate me, threaten my life, and call me infidel. I will show you that I am bigger than any of that. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a restaurant. It has the finest food and all the ice-cold water you need. Go in peace."

Cursing him again, the desperate Taliban staggered away, over the hill.

Several hours later, he crawled back, almost dead, and gasped, "They won't let me in without a tie!"

[BenLurkin]

Yeah...but you still don't want to mess with those girls...

[muir_redwoods]

Why is she unlike jello?

[GraceG]

Jewish dilemma: Free bacon.

If it is turkey bacon is there a dilemma?

[GraceG]

Reminds me of the list of my familys polish jokes.

[familyop]

"WHERE THE HELL DO YOU LIVE?"

Hell is a Roman construct.

[familyop]

The necktie is also a Roman construct.

[Joe Boucher]

Good job Ben

[Calvin Locke]

The borscht belt is indeed no more, since, as “Kellerman” said in that movie, “Kids would rather go to Europe nowadays than learn to rhumba”.

[familyop]

"Do you even live in or have you ever visited the U.S.?"

I'm not Jewish and have no envy. I'm not a missionizer either. Don't harass me, Bro. I'm an American who served his nation, as many of my hundreds of years of forefathers did. I don't adorn trees. I clean up after petting a dog. Might even observe Sukkot. It's my First Amendment right to do such things.

Are you recently descended from Europe?

[familyop]

"No I am not, two generations born here, two generations served."

Some of my American ancestors landed in the 1600s, others long before and some since. I identify as an American of mixed heritage and entertain no illusions about the matter.

"go easy on the whiskey."

I haven't drank any alcohol for several years. Regardless of the perceived national origin of the person being spoken about, stating such a presumption, even in implication, is an error.

This, from far to the west of the Hudson River and far to the east of the west coast. I continue to support Israel, and like it or not, pray for all that is to come.

[familyop]

I wrote, in comment #46:
"Hell is a Roman construct."

You replied, in comment #53:
"BS."

We simply disagree on that then. I don't believe in the existence of such a place or punishment.

[familyop]

"Why you would want to observe Sukkot is beyond me."

Zechariah, Chapter 14, 16 through 19 (Artscroll Stone Edition or Judaica Press). I'm already living in a meager arrangement in a harsh and barren place anyway, while praying for everything that will happen.

[familyop]

On attitudes toward rednecks, some folks have expressed on discussion boards, that they found Jewish redheads to be hilarious, but I didn't see the humor in it at the time.

Red Hair
Mediterranean
Wikipedia (as accessed on 16FEB15)
Mediterranean

Red hair is also found amongst the Ashkenazi Jewish populations.[18] In European culture, prior to the 20th century, red hair was often seen as a stereotypically Jewish trait: during the Spanish Inquisition, all those with red hair were identified as Jewish.[19] In Italy, red hair was associated with Italian Jews, and Judas was traditionally depicted as red-haired in Italian and Spanish art.[20] Writers from Shakespeare to Dickens would identify Jewish characters by giving them red hair.[21] The stereotype that red hair is Jewish remains in parts of Eastern Europe and Russia.[22]

And genetic stuff of interest to some (not much of an interest for me),...

Origins (as accessed on 16FEB15 at Wikipedia)

The non-tanning skin associated with red hair may have been advantageous in far-northern climates where sunlight is scarce. Studies by Bodmer and Cavalli-Sforza (1976) hypothesized that lighter skin pigmentation prevents rickets in colder climates by encouraging higher levels of Vitamin D production and also allows the individual to retain heat better than someone with darker skin.[30] In 2000, Harding et al. concluded that red hair was not the result of positive selection and instead proposed that it occurs because of a lack of negative selection. In Africa, for example, red hair is selected against because high levels of sun would be harmful to untanned skin. However, in Northern Europe this does not happen, so redheads come about through genetic drift.[27]

[PistolPaknMama]

Ha ha ha :)

[terycarl]

We simply disagree on that then. I don't believe in the existence of such a place or punishment

The interesting thing about Heaven, Hell, and even God is that whether or not you believe in them....they exist...

[familyop]

Another false accusation implied by a Chrstian. I believe in G-d, but only One. We call it “Unity.”