Posted on 04/09/2013 5:27:53 PM PDT by Darksheare
I just spent alot of time posting!
I see that, looks like you hit a small bump.
Pictured: Small Bump
What happened?
Well, someone set up us the bomb?
I'm serious!
Oh, well.. looks like your post got pulled.
Augh! I spent alot of effort on that! How did it happen?!
Couldn't be because you were doing it wrong?
What the, how'd you get that video of m-- uh.. I don't even wear that!
Right Skippy. *cough* Well, since you asked, here's how posts get removed.
First, if it is against TOS it gets seen.
Then it gets marked.
Okay, I have that much.
Then the mods gather:
Pictured, mods gathering.
I don't think that's how it looks, I..
Look, do you want an answer or not?
...Yes?
Right, carrying on.
Then they back their vehicle up to your post.
Whoah! What the heck is that thing?!
It's a machine, that eats other machines.
With this:
I don't see what this has to do with my post vanishing, can you tell me wha-
Watch it question boy! I have a flamethrower!
You want to vanish like your dog did?
What the?! No, not Roozer too!
To be fair, your dog WAS drunk.
What?! Who would even... please don't point that flamethrower at me.
Right, and after they saw your post off the entire forum, they set it on fire.
Wait.. that man. His face, and fire! Oh GOD WHY?!
Oh, HIS post was all about his face, so the mods set it on fire.
After that, they used the ashes to open a gate between our world and theirs, like this:
BLECH! That's horrible!
And those tentacles! GAAAH!
If you think that's bad, you should see what happens when the mods get their hands on a bad thread.
Pictured: Mod hands
Oh look, here comes a mod now.
Looks like they want to ask you about that thread you just posted.
Gaaah! Tell them I'm indisposed!
Pictured: Moderator, dunno which one.
Tell them yourself, they're right behind you.
Wait, don't run away!
We haven't gotten to what happens when they edit your thread title!
This concludes our sordid fictional tale.
If you liked that, we have plenty more in the book "Oh the horrible things you'll summon!" rumored to be written by IamnotaMod
It’s a trap ... know Darks too well. eeeEEEEE!!!
Just finished my first cup of coffee.
I shall now attempt to assume human form.
Perhaps that is my problem?
I have my coffee first before attempting to assume human form, thus the effort is bad and the “other-ness” I have seeps out around tehcracks and edges?
Pretty much...
Ever since Klaatu came to the planet in the 1950s the South Americans have been producing genetically modified coffee that is intended to cause other-ness to leak from non-earthbound species. It has no effect on humans. Since Klaatu had no problem looking exactly like a human, we needed some way of getting you all to expose yourselves.
Since every one of you will be invited to drink a cup of coffee at some point, you are almost certain to be exposed.
Odd, since I am also the keeper of the world’s worst coffee.
It’s in the beans. It doesn’t matter how you roast or brew them.
But what’s with the zombie deer due to my coffee?
Surely that isn’t the intended outcome!
I like your coffee just fine. Daily turning into a rotting zombie doesn’t even scare the cats anymore. They eat the pieces that fall off, but of course, once the coffee wears off, the pieces all grow back again.
I’m amazed at the resilience of my cats. All that zombie meat, and they’re healthy as can be!
They’re probably unimpressed with human antics in that case.
Cats are remarkably unflappable when they get used to something crazy.
Unlike deer that have never been poisoned by your vile coUgh... I mean enhanced... yeah, that's
it... enhanced by your delicious coffee-like substance, they do not destroy the vegetation, being
carnivores.
Indeed.
Close your eyes and picture the scariest thing you can think of. Maybe it's a giant spider or a giant Stay Puft marshmallow man or something that's not even giant at all. Well, whatever it is, I guarantee it's not nearly as scary as the real scariest thing in the world. That's long-term unemployment.
That gives me a story idea. Attack of the job-sucking spiders. They jump on your head and stick their legs into your brain and suck the drive to either get a job or create a job right out of you.
Worst yet, they are hideous beasts. They look something like this:
It gives me nightmares just thinking about it.
Trespassing Idiot: “Why are these deer mobbing us? Wait, that nibbling, it tickles. What are they, uh.. uh oh.. AIIEEE!”
And they let out a warbling munchkin voice ‘Chaaaaange! chaaaaange!’
Yeeesss, well... When we had our back-up generator installed, I did have to make some... questionable deals... with the deer. You know, like, please wait until all the work and fine tuning are finished before yo... that is, uh...
I ain’t sayin’ anymore.
Ah yes, I believe the zombie murder squirrels are one of nully’s escaped projects.
On the whole, NY is improved with those things.
Workforeman: “Hey, those are some neat deer you have backin that pen. They snuffled at us and whistled the entire time.
We’re done now and.. wait.. why is that gate locked, and the pen is now open? AUGH!”
It's a seasonal thing.
any season...
How did they escape?
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