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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***
Posted on 03/15/2013 5:42:17 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Today I swung my front door wide open and placed my Stevens 320 right in the doorway. I gave it 5 shells, and noticing that it had no legs, even placed it in my wheelchair to help it get around. I then left it alone and went about my business. While I was gone, the mailman delivered my mail, the neighbor boy across the street mowed the yard, a girl walked her dog down the street, and quite a few cars stopped at the stop sign right in front of our house. After about an hour, I checked on the gun. It was still sitting there in the wheelchair, right where I had left it. It hadnt rolled itself outside. It certainly hadnt killed anyone, even with the numerous opportunities it had been presented to do so. In fact, it hadnt even loaded itself. Well you can imagine my surprise, with all the media hype about how dangerous guns are and how they kill people. Either the media is wrong, and its the misuse of guns by PEOPLE that kills people, or I'm in possession of the laziest gun in the world. Alright, well Im off to check on my spoons. I hear theyre making people fat.
(This is meant to make a point, not to be a literal representation of events. No gun was actually left unattended, just as no spoons were actually checked on. If you cannot grasp this, then you are more dense than the metal the gun is made from. Thank you.)
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: guns; insanity; ofst; silliness
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
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To: TheOldLady
I've heard Michelob Ultra is like making love in a canoe
181
posted on
03/15/2013 10:03:48 AM PDT
by
r-q-tek86
("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
To: TheOldLady
182
posted on
03/15/2013 10:04:22 AM PDT
by
llevrok
(Keep your arms out. It makes it harder for them to throw a net over you.)
To: Cyber Liberty
I wasn’t complaining, just happy to know that there is another club member aboard.
183
posted on
03/15/2013 10:04:59 AM PDT
by
r-q-tek86
("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
To: r-q-tek86; llevrok
Old ladies can die laughing, you know. You’re giving me a tummy ache. ;-P
To: r-q-tek86
I’m on the OFST, aren’t I? I thought it was a prerequisite.
185
posted on
03/15/2013 10:09:25 AM PDT
by
Cyber Liberty
(I am a dissident. Will you join me? My name is John....)
To: TheOldLady
Yeah, I know. It’s mighty liberal of me, ain’t it? ;)
186
posted on
03/15/2013 10:12:06 AM PDT
by
ZirconEncrustedTweezers
(I'll stop being a cynic when the world stops giving me reasons to be cynical.)
To: r-q-tek86
I’ve done that and its nothing like it.
187
posted on
03/15/2013 10:14:07 AM PDT
by
envisio
(Its on like Donkey Kong!!)
To: Daffynition
My 8 year old grand niece just got her first pair of boots - pink.
I sent this photo to her mom with the comment - “it is never too soon to teach a girl how to accessorize those boots”.
Her dad (my nephew) is rolling on the floor!!
188
posted on
03/15/2013 10:14:38 AM PDT
by
llevrok
(Keep your arms out. It makes it harder for them to throw a net over you.)
To: Cyber Liberty
RE your about page... Is “Nice Lady JAG” different from “Lady JAG”?
189
posted on
03/15/2013 10:15:31 AM PDT
by
r-q-tek86
("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
To: BenLurkin
You know how the Chinese name their children? They drop a fork on the floor.Well, that explains "YAO!!"
190
posted on
03/15/2013 10:15:37 AM PDT
by
Old Sarge
(We are officially over the precipice, we just havent struck the ground yet...)
To: envisio
Ive done that and its nothing like it.F-ing close to water? Sure it is...
191
posted on
03/15/2013 10:16:48 AM PDT
by
r-q-tek86
("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
To: Arrowhead1952; Cyber Liberty; TheOldLady
Now what?
I had posted that very same .gif two weeks ago, and there was no issue!?
Must be the sunspots, or something...
192
posted on
03/15/2013 10:18:05 AM PDT
by
Old Sarge
(We are officially over the precipice, we just havent struck the ground yet...)
To: r-q-tek86
Oh, well, when you say it like that....
193
posted on
03/15/2013 10:18:41 AM PDT
by
envisio
(Its on like Donkey Kong!!)
To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers
Now I don’t believe you’re the one who got it deleted.
There’s nothing liberal about you, sir.
To: r-q-tek86; Lady Jag
Is Nice Lady JAG different from Lady JAG? Nope! Lady Jag happens to be a nice lady who made a cartoon for me.
195
posted on
03/15/2013 10:20:28 AM PDT
by
Cyber Liberty
(I am a dissident. Will you join me? My name is John....)
To: r-q-tek86
Did y'all know I can jump higher than my house?
In all fairness, my house can't jump very high at all.
196
posted on
03/15/2013 10:20:52 AM PDT
by
r-q-tek86
("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
To: Old Sarge
New Mods are apparently being trained, and there’s always a shake-out of the jerks.
197
posted on
03/15/2013 10:21:37 AM PDT
by
Cyber Liberty
(I am a dissident. Will you join me? My name is John....)
To: TheOldLady; ZirconEncrustedTweezers
Aside from his tattoos and penchant for midget porn, yeah he’s pretty conservative.
198
posted on
03/15/2013 10:21:42 AM PDT
by
envisio
(Its on like Donkey Kong!!)
To: r-q-tek86
Well, what man here wouldn’t get a little hot under the collar at the sight of a half-naked woman using a rifle?
And define “beer.”
199
posted on
03/15/2013 10:21:52 AM PDT
by
ZirconEncrustedTweezers
(I'll stop being a cynic when the world stops giving me reasons to be cynical.)
To: envisio
200
posted on
03/15/2013 10:22:20 AM PDT
by
r-q-tek86
("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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