Can men and women really be friends?
NO. Because -
Liking a woman enough to be friends with her is, generally speaking, HIGHER on a man's relationship scale than wanting to have sex with her. Eg. - Men will have sex with a woman they have absolutely no interest in talking to or spending time with. Therefore, if a man likes a woman enough to be friends with her, BY DEFAULT, he already likes her enough to want to have sex with her. That's how men work. If he could, he would.
(Unless he is gay. Which makes him not a man in this case because he doesn't want to have sex with ANY woman.)
Men and women can be just friends, but in a very limited sense.
I am married. Most of my male friends are my husband’s friends and therefore mine by extension. I never spend time with them unless hubby is present. I might run into them while doing errands, and we briefly chat. Our relationship is warm and friendly but I do not call them, ask them to hang out with me, ask them to go shopping, etc.
Or I have some male friends but I only see them in a group context.
A woman cannot be friends with men like she can be friends with women. End of story. I like that this video really exposes that.
Spot on, but it was covered well in When Harry Met Sally.
It is why my wife and I have an agreement that I will never have one-on-one lunches or coffee with other women.
It can start very innocently, even if you dearly love your wife.
I think we should ask Laz.
The guy with the sandwich is the authority in the video.
Bump for truth.
In fact, if any of you women have male friends, I can guarantee that 99% of them would want to have sex with you ASAP. A guy cannot have a cordial friendly relationship with a woman for any length of time without at least fantasizing about getting in her pants, and as time goes on, seriously wanting to.
Just can’t happen.
No, men and women can’t be friends, and it is why under most circumstances like weddings, funerals, birthdays, holidays, special events, generally the men hang with the guys talking sports, cars, guns, stocks and boning women, and the women hang with other women talking about money, bills, house projects, money, school, women they hate, women they hate even more, money, problems with their mother, money.
Actually I have no clue what women talk about when they are together, but you get my dorifto.
One place I worked was all male engineers and one female. the lady engineer was not some ravishing beauty, but attractive enough that most of the guys hit on her hoping to score. When you have a dozen guys and one woman, her value soars and she know it. That’s just human nature.
Our male consultant was seen hanging with her constantly and everyone was convinved they were dating. Not me. I said, “they aren’t dating, they are girlfriends”.
Sure enough he turned out to be homosexual and nobody could understand how I knew. To me, it was just completely obvious. All you had to do was talk relationships. I would say I need a girl and he would say “partner”. The words girl or babe or boobs or any other female reference would never leave his lips. It only took me one such conversation to figure he was a homosexual.
It is a simple, foolproof test to find out if someone is homosexual. Just ask about a past girlfriend or past relationship, and a homosexual guy can’t use the term girl or woman.
Actually you nailed it that friendship is higher on a guy’s scale of relationship intamacy than sex is. Not that sex doesn’t strengthen the bond of friendship in a healthy relationship.
Most single guys wouldn’t think twice about having sex with an attractive woman they would NEVER want to be friends with. We would jump at the opportunity and flee at the first sign she wanted a commitment.
I’ve been friends with ugly girls, including several in college.
Inevitably, they’d get drunk and confess their love to me and cuss me for sleeping with/dating the cheerleader types.
Well, the purpose of sex is to serve as an impediment to reproduction.
I’ve had guy friends. It’s up to the woman to remind that ‘this is a friendship only’. Wanting to and doing are two different things.
“Can men and women really be friends?
NO. Because -”
Perhaps because they’re insecure about themselves and weak in the area of giving into the temptation of cheating? If a married man and woman have that absolute love and trust between one and other it shouldn’t matter if their friends are male or female. In fact, I’ve seen a wife’s female friends create problems in marriages as well as a husbands male friends so opposite sex friendships shouldn’t be any more of an issue.
That’s not to say a wife should be hanging out with a male friend every evening at the cocktail lounge while the husband comes home to an empty house. The spouses needs come first.
Utter bravo sierra. As I said in the previous thread, I have friendships with many women, including a regular riding (bicycle) partner. Even if you’re single, just because you find a woman attractive doesn’t necessarily mean that you’d ruin a friendship by bringing sex into it. Men and women can most certainly be friends. Hell, I’m very close friends with a woman that I’ve known for 32 years, that started out as a teenage crush. Neither the closeness nor the beginning as an adolescent crush has ever impaired our friendship.
Brilliant. Just brilliant.
Here is the thing. Any guy who is a guy...knows the inner workings of guys.
That makes it very tough for fathers with cute daughters.
What nonsense. I have always had more guy friends than gal friends and some of them have been friends for 30 years.
Not all men are pigs and just think of sex.
I would carve out an exception: men can be "just friends" with a woman they are not at all sexually attracted to. You can be friends with a much, much older woman, for example.
For a woman you would find sexually attractive to any degree, intimacy will tend to lead to desire, which will lead to frustration if the desire is not reciprocated. Even if you initially don't think the woman is all that "hot", friendly intimacy would lead to increasing sexual interest.
The video appears to take place on a college campus and the interviewees appear to have the shallowness of youth. They are only answering in terms of the world as they experience it.
Expand the world view to include a 20 something man and a 65 year old woman who took an interest in his education. Would he say that they could not just be friends?
How about a 28 year old man and a 55 year old woman in his profession who took an interest in mentoring him?
How about a 55 year old man and a 40 year old nun working on a community project?
The world view of the interviewees is too narrow.
Perhaps this is true for most non-Christians. I believe it is possible for Christian men to be friends with Christian women without hitting on them though.
Bunch-a-hooey. I’m friends with lots of women, never even gotten close to a “situation” because I’m not that dumb. We aren’t animals, we actually CAN practice self control.
Marge: “Homer, haven’t you noticed that he prefers the company of men?”
Homer: “Who doesn’t!”
I have been able to work alone on nightshift with women most of my working life. It seems, for me at least, I don’t have any problem being friends with these women in a work context. However out side of work I tend to try not to be alone with any woman I am friendly with for more than 30 mintues. I think any man who trusts himself too much is either much stronger emotionally than me or a fool.
Mel