Image: Dilbert.com
Posted on 12/29/2011 9:32:50 AM PST by Pharmboy
Image: Dilbert.com
We are nearly at the end of 2011 and another year of mayhem behind. We will be judging our 2011 Non-Predictions and trying to dream up some new ones for 2012 in the next fortnight or so but this week we have been able to get some long needed admin done.
With it came a realisation that even if the financial industry is suffering, the creative management community has been in full swing dreaming up new terms and phrases to camouflage the blindingly obvious.
The evolution of ‘management speak’ means some phrases die and some survive and flourish. TMM really doesn't know what determines the success of one term or phrase over another other than, as with the arts, adoption and patronage by the most respected in the field. TMM hope that this year’s rash of newcomers all die off naturally but we would like to help with a shove into their deserved obscurity.
(Excerpt) Read more at businessinsider.com ...
As in we are "efforting a solution to that issue."
Utter barf!
One of the few times I actually "faceplamed" in a meeting.
.
“24/7”
“Good to go”.
Nails on chalkboard.
When I worked for a DoD company by the initials of LM, Six Sigma was a big thing and another thing there was something called “Full Spectrum Leadership”. WHen it came to performance appraisals, they were big into the 360 Degree Feedback as well. When I left there, it seems the political items were much more important than getting the job done.
> Been there, done that, didn’t write the book though. TQM, Six Sigma too.
Articles like this really shift some paradigms in the hope of increasing workplace synergy.
Verbing weirds language.
Cheers!
The only thing that kept me sane during H.R. Staff Meetings was playing Wonk Word Bingo, with the sheet hidden under my notebook. As everyone was trying to on-up everyone else, the “annoying management terms” were flying. Arrrrgh!
*PLEASE* tell me that your FR handle has nothing to do with the DoD computer language Ada.
Cheers!
But only in the context of filling your "car buying needs". Whenever I hear "your something-or-other needs", it reminds me of the light-night infomercials that are forever infesting the airwaves these days.
You’re thinking outside the box.
I hate that the verb “take away” has morphed into the noun “takeaway”. So annoying!
“TQM”
When “TQMS” was introduced to MacDonnell-Douglas in Long Beach a couple of decades ago, it was said to mean “Time to Quit and Move to Seattle”.
Goal oriented.
Where I work, we sometimes have pre-launch meetings to discuss what we want to bring up at the launch meetings.
“Going Forward” drives me nut.
My personal pet peeve has always been the term “Mission-Statement” en lieu of “MISSION”.
When taught how to write a five paragraph order, the Mission was a succinct statement of our total objective. Of course it is a ‘statement’. Only an incompetent, redundant, micro-manager would describe the Mission as a Mission-Statement. ARGHHH!!
“Walk back” is the one that riles me.
“I appreciate you taking a proactive approach, but first we need to formulate our action plan...”
Once the action plan is complete, the next step is to circle back and have another WebEx.
Just don’t make it on the 31st as I will be out of pocket for most of the day.
I like to send them. It helps separate honest people from frauds and blowhards. Often people will insist on being part of the conversations even when they have nothing to add and will take away nothing, so if they don't respond to the pretty low bar of "please advise", I ignore them from then on.
Sorry about the honesty gauntlet but intellectual dishonesty is pretty common these days.
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