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Dealing with gay family member situation (vanity)

Posted on 12/08/2011 11:52:02 AM PST by AUJenn

We have a close family member who decided a few years ago that she was gay. I say 'decided' because up until then, she had always dated men and was actually about to get married. It came as a huge shock to everyone and has taken a while to get used to. She has had the same partner since she announced her lifestyle change. It has been difficult for me and other family members to accept and get used to their living arrangements, lifestyle, etc, especially on holidays. But as time has gone on, I have accepted this is how she is going to live and there is nothing I can do about it. But I don't like it.

I have always been polite and cordial because I see no sense in being rude or hostile. And if I were hateful, it would just give conservatives/Christians a bad name IMO, and would add fuel to their fire. That being said....she has announced that she and her partner are having a baby. The partner is pregnant. This has really thrown us for a loop, as we never expected this to happen.

It so happens that I have a small child and am expecting again, so it really makes me think. I am completely against their doing this. But I have no idea how to publicly act or respond to this situation - especially at upcoming family holiday events. I don't feel like happily telling them 'congratulations!' or talking about baby things. I think about how this poor kid is going to feel about his/her parent situation, or how I'm going to explain to my children why this baby 'has two moms' and on and on.

If anyone has a gay family member or has been in a similar situation, I'd love to hear how you handle it. Thank you -


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: family; gayfamilymember; homosexualagenda; sin
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To: wolfman23601; Olog-hai
"I have a 3 year old and my brother is gay. I simply will not let my son be around if my brother’s boyfriend is going to be there."

That must be a terrible burden for you....to have to worry for the future contacts between your brother & your son.

I'm glad there have never been sodiomites in my family!

281 posted on 12/09/2011 11:52:46 PM PST by FW190
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To: little jeremiah

I hear you. The anger in my sister and in laws is shocking. It’s ironic that we are so often accused of being hateful and afraid.


282 posted on 12/10/2011 6:43:19 AM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: trisham; little jeremiah
I have that, too. My sister is very liberal, very pro-gay and has Obama mouse pads, posters, etc. Years ago I pointed her to an article on FR about the AIDS gift givers, bug chasers and how some gays saw having AIDS as a badge of honor.

Here reply was: "How dare you say that about gays. How DARE you... blah blah blah." So I asked her if the article was incorrect and where? In her reply she called me a hater, bigot, racist and didn't bother answering my question. So I asked her again and she continued to call me names.

I think this is the article to which I pointed my sister: Bug Chasers:The men who long to be HIV+

Freeper Remedy posted that one.

283 posted on 12/10/2011 7:24:44 AM PST by scripter ("You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body." - C.S. Lewis)
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To: trisham; little jeremiah
Here's an article I posted in 2003: Acting Up In the article: The Gift Takes A Hard Look at Contemporary Gay Culture, Where HIV is Sexy and Prevention is Passé.
284 posted on 12/10/2011 7:43:47 AM PST by scripter ("You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body." - C.S. Lewis)
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To: AUJenn

You only have to draw a line if the lesbos sexually manipulate their kid in a way that you think is harmful to the child’s natural development. For example, if they announce their six year old boy is a girl and needs his equipment cut off or encourage him to dress and act like a girl you might have to say something.

Since homos are mental and often centered sexually on children, you should keep them at arm’s length from your children. If their children are abused in the course of being exposed to the “gay community”, they will most likely interact inappropriately with other children in secret.

Visiting with them at annual family functions is one thing; turning your children over to their care is another.


285 posted on 12/10/2011 7:51:53 AM PST by SaraJohnson
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To: scripter; little jeremiah

Another article, but from Wikipedia:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bugchasing


286 posted on 12/10/2011 8:28:44 AM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: scripter; little jeremiah

Excellent article.


287 posted on 12/10/2011 8:30:59 AM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: trisham
Thanks. Along with many other links, I think the three links on the subject should be posted often. People need to be informed to better help their education on all things gay.
288 posted on 12/10/2011 8:56:58 AM PST by scripter ("You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body." - C.S. Lewis)
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To: scripter; little jeremiah

Agreed. The average person has no idea what happens in the homosexual culture. They’re simply naive and uninformed.


289 posted on 12/10/2011 9:00:44 AM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: scripter; trisham

I’ll add those articles to my file for re-posting. As soon as I get the hang of my new to me laptop. Computer problems as usual...


290 posted on 12/10/2011 4:33:24 PM PST by little jeremiah (We will have to go through hell to get out of hell.)
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To: trisham

And that’s been part of their method - keep what they actually DO hidden away, and present themselves as cleancut, normal kindly people who are merely victims of nazi-like bigots.


291 posted on 12/10/2011 4:40:03 PM PST by little jeremiah (We will have to go through hell to get out of hell.)
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To: Hot Tabasco
how do you suppose HE would treat your close family member especially knowing she was going to have a child?

How did He treat the moneylenders in the temple? He turned over their tables and lashed them out with a whip.

You must be listening to the Methodists, Episcopalians or Lutherans. Pity.

292 posted on 12/12/2011 12:16:41 PM PST by Albion Wilde (A land of hyper-legalisms is not the same as a land of law. --Mark Steyn)
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To: Mr. Quarterpanel
I do not believe that one chooses to be gay.

Research disagrees with your liberal position there; however, every adult must choose how to use his or her sexual behaviors, even heterosexuals. Many heteros live alone rather than commit sin. Homosexuals don't seem to believe this is even possible.

293 posted on 12/12/2011 12:21:12 PM PST by Albion Wilde (A land of hyper-legalisms is not the same as a land of law. --Mark Steyn)
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To: AUJenn

My son has picked up some hard liberal views during the last few years. I had a difficult time with it until I decided that I love my son more than my politics. Jesus makes it easier.


294 posted on 12/12/2011 12:41:22 PM PST by InvisibleChurch ( go in peace , serve the Lord)
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To: Albion Wilde
You must be listening to the Methodists, Episcopalians or Lutherans. Pity.

Listen to me my brother, send me your love offering (I accept personal checks, Visa and MasterCard) and in return, I'll pray for you and send you a blessed prayer hankie...God Bless You Brother!

Sincerely,

Your fellow soldier in the Army of Christ,

Jimmy......


295 posted on 12/12/2011 2:11:15 PM PST by Hot Tabasco (Be good, Santa is coming)
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To: Albion Wilde
You must be listening to the Methodists, Episcopalians or Lutherans. Pity.

I don't subscribe to any particular religion and I'm on record here in saying so. Why? Because each and every one of them, YOURS included, is filled with hypocrites such as yourself, consumed with your own self-righteousness at the exclusion of the attrocities which go on within your own churches........

Until you're able to purge your own ranks of homosexuals, adulterers, pederasts and liars, don't preach to me who I should accept in a personal family environment....

296 posted on 12/12/2011 2:25:40 PM PST by Hot Tabasco (Be good, Santa is coming)
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To: Albion Wilde

Thank you for classifying my response. Obviously, you don’t have a close relationship with anyone who is gay. I was not commenting on sexual behavior. I was commenting on whether one should ostracize a family member that is gay.

Please try to keep up with the conversation.


297 posted on 12/13/2011 4:57:45 AM PST by Mr. Quarterpanel (I am not an actor, but I play one on TV)
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To: Hot Tabasco
I don't subscribe to any particular religion and I'm on record here in saying so. Why? Because each and every one of them, YOURS included, is filled with hypocrites such as yourself, consumed with your own self-righteousness at the exclusion of the attrocities which go on within your own churches........ Until you're able to purge your own ranks of homosexuals, adulterers, pederasts and liars, don't preach to me who I should accept in a personal family environment....

And why is it that you think I subscribe to a religion? I stay out of places of worship as much as possible. You project a lot onto simple posts. Check yourself.

298 posted on 12/13/2011 9:54:46 AM PST by Albion Wilde (A land of hyper-legalisms is not the same as a land of law. --Mark Steyn)
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To: Mr. Quarterpanel
Obviously, you don’t have a close relationship with anyone who is gay. I was not commenting on sexual behavior. I was commenting on whether one should ostracize a family member that is gay. Please try to keep up with the conversation.

My dear freeposter, having been educated from childhood in the arts and having worked in the arts for my entire adult life, you could not be more wrong. From ballet instructors to art teachers to co-workers and social friends, I have known hundreds of gays, and dozens as close personal friends. Most of them are dead now because, like most gay people, they died young, or younger than their straight peers, and have not lived to be as old as I am.

I still mourn one friend in particular who worked with me for 18 years -- we were as close as siblings and I will miss him until I die, when I hope to be reunited with him, regardless of his gay behavior on earth. We talked about his fears of having disappointed God on his deathbed from AIDS, where I was the only friend still at his side; and no, I do not believe God would have rejected him from heaven, given all that I knew about him.

I'm now at the stage where I don't meet many new people nor invite new friendships outside of my large family, but I deal with gays all the time at my little retirement job. They love me because I cater to their particular needs that our business can provide; and I do so without making them feel judged or uncomfortable.

But none of that makes me believe that homosexual behavior is a good thing for the individual or for society; or that parents should allow their children to be indoctrinated that homosexual behaviors are immutable and acceptable choices.

If anyone has had the chance to view this situation objectively, it is I. It has been knowing gays well and hearing their stories of childhood and growing up that have convinced me it is a disorder, and not just another harmless option.

299 posted on 12/13/2011 10:12:00 AM PST by Albion Wilde (A land of hyper-legalisms is not the same as a land of law. --Mark Steyn)
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To: Albion Wilde
But none of that makes me believe that homosexual behavior is a good thing for the individual or for society...

I never said it was good. I am not happy to be in this position. I simply cannot change certain things, and I am left with either accepting the situation, or rejecting it. It cannot be put simpler. You can wax philosophically using phrases like "options" and "choices" that make it sound like what to choose for dessert in a cafeteria line. You don't show a depth of comprehension when you talk like that. Also, "homosexual" and "behavior" need to be separated here. What One is, and what One does are two different things. One does not have to be homosexual to have bad behavior. I would postulate that you refuse to see things for what they are, and that is your choice. But it does not reflect reality in my opinion.

I am comfortable with my position, and you seem to be comfortable with yours.

300 posted on 12/13/2011 1:23:37 PM PST by Mr. Quarterpanel (I am not an actor, but I play one on TV)
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