(SHIK SHIK)
Drop the cookies.
Posted on 03/08/2011 4:19:55 PM PST by mamelukesabre
This little ditty is making the rounds lately...probably going viral if not already:
"A CEO, a union rep, and a tea party activist sat in a room with 12 cookies. The CEO took 11 of them and said to the tea party activist, "Look out, the union guy is about to take your cookie."
Who brought the cookies?
Then the union rep took 6 from the CEO.
Who payed for the cookies?
Who paid for the cookies in the first place? If it’s theft we’re talking about, neither the CEO nor the union has any right to any of them.
What’s the point of this little ditty again?
The union guy glares at the CEO, says, “Nice bunch a cookies you got there. Shame if something happened to them”. Then he took 10 of the cookies and passed them out to his friends, but not before he pocketed 5 of them for himself. The Tea Partier simply went into the kitchen and baked another batch, then handed them out to everyone on a first-come, first-served basis. After all, as a producer, the Tea Partier knew she could always bake more.
And while the CEO was talking to the Tea Party guy, no one realized that the union guy ate ALL the cookies. The End
The Union guy stormed out and the CEO gave 1200 new jobs to Tea Party activists.
BS the Union guy would be out protesting.
The tea party guy got up and went and twisted the CEO arm and took all 11 cookies from him and the Union guy sat there dumfounded and reached for the last cookie and the Tea partier kicked out the chair from Union guy.
Moral Do not mess with a tea partier because he likes to be able to dunk his cookies in his milk. Both the CEO and the Union had a secret bargaining agreement and the TeaPartier decided to break the unions back and be able to negotiate a new contract with all new cookies with the CEO.
Hope this okay.
(SHIK SHIK)
Drop the cookies.
Tea party guy says, “I don’t care, I bring my own cookies.”
A jug eared community activist of questionable parentage, raised as a child of privilege by his grandparents, came along, saw that the people had an abundant supply of affordable cookies, and that some people who weren't willing to work had no cookies. He got elected to office and took cookies and money by force from the cookie maker. The cookie maker quit making cookies. No one had jobs, and there were no more cookies.
And everyone was happy because there was social justice (I made that last part up). The rest is true - more or less.
There is a difference between private sector and public sector unions. This is just an attempt to blur the difference. Substitute “taxpayer” for the “CEO’ and all of a sudden it makes no sense.
And... what kind of cookies are they?
Of the 11 cookies the CEO took, 6 were used to pay expenses including payroll. Of the 5 remaining 2 were used for investment in future projects. Of the 3 cookies remaining 1 went to cover compliance with new federally mandated pollution requirements. These were updates from those issued only 5 years ago. Of the 2 cookies remaining one half of one cookie was issued to the stockholders as dividends. The CEO has been considering doing away with the dividend. Of the remaining 1 1/2 cookies 35% went to the Federal Govt in taxes and 5% more in accumulated state taxes for the various production sites. That leaves .9 cookies for profit.
The cookie lying on the table for the tea party or the union was snapped up by the union. The head of the union then asked the CEO for his share of the CEO’s cookies in benefits and pay. He also said he was going to strike for more cookies next year if the CEO didn’t share even more of the cookies.
The CEO is thinking about relocating overseas. The tea party guy is pissed because he contributed all the damn cookies in the first place by buying the company’s union made products.
Best answer - thanks for the laugh of the day. “Jug eared community activist of questionable parentage”...still laughing.
A CEO owns a company that makes cookies, he employs people, pays for the building, equipment, utilities and the ingredients and sells them to Tea Party activists who pay for the product and always cleans up after eating them.
A union organizer shows up, organizes the shop and goes on strike, the CEO can’t meet the bills and closes shop leaving all the workers unemployed. They go on their one year of unemployment, gradually lose the desire to work and eventually drop out of the job market.
The president goes on TV states he knows how to create jobs, ignorant politicians state the unemployment payments create jobs and the CEO finds another CEO job through his network of cronies.
The Tea Party activist keeps working and finds another brand of cookies, this time baked in Tennessee.
How’d I do?
This one is the best thus far.
It’s not mean spirited and it’s a nice retort.
Excellent retort! Spot on.
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