Posted on 12/18/2010 2:15:02 PM PST by JoeProBono
For many people, Christmas is a time for celebration. It is a time of parties, gift giving, reunions, food and vacationing.
Christmas is also a time of music, and there are countless songs that people enjoy during the holiday season. The music of the holiday season is something that unites people, as both religious and popular songs are enjoyed by a wide variety of people.
Of course, not all Christmas songs are universally enjoyed. Some tend to be a little more annoying than others and some are flat-out painful.
This may be due to the song itself, or it may be because it has simply been overplayed for so long that no one wants to hear it anymore. With that in mind, here are a few of the most annoying Christmas songs and why they are difficult to hear during the season.
Annoying Christmas Song No. 5: I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas
Granted, it is understandable if people want something a bit more unique than the standard sweater or new pair of socks. However, the premise of the song is just not all that funny and listening to an entire song about a hippopotamus is a bit distracting.
In addition, the music and recording of this song makes it difficult to stomach and it proves a little too cute for even a festive season like Christmas, when people are generally in a better mood. The squeaky voice and the irritating lyrics have undoubtedly inspired many radio listeners to change the station and move on to something else.
Despite the annoyance of this song, as least it ends quickly and does not drag on, and on, and on ...
Annoying Christmas Song No. 4: The Twelve Days Of Christmas
At face value this song is not necessarily a terrible idea. It is a song about gift giving, and the person getting the gifts is obviously excited. The problem with this song is that it just never seems to end.
Not only is the singer going to tell the audience about all 12 gifts, but she is also going to repeat all the prior gifts as she goes along, as if she were making sure that everyone is paying attention. Face it, it's basically the Christmas equivalent of "100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall."
To make matters worse, the song finds it necessary to draw out the explanation of one of the gifts. The audience doesn't just get to hear about the nice jewelry that was received. Instead they get to hear about, "... five gooooooooooolden riiiiiiiiiiiiings!!" Then they get to hear about those golden bands several more times.
Of course it could be worse. Your mom could be kissing a stranger in a red suit.
Annoying Christmas Song No. 3:I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
It's true people should not read too much into certain aspects of life. Some songs are meant to be playful and are not to be taken seriously.
This includes various Christmas songs that are meant to be funny. Unfortunately, some of them just come across as irritating. The question for this song is, why is Mommy kissing Old Saint Nick?
Not only is this song disturbing, but also it lacks a lot of lyrical depth. The song tells us that the singer saw Mommy kissing Santa and wouldn't it be funny if Daddy knew. Something tells us that Daddy might not find that situation all that funny, unless of course Daddy is Santa ... but that's just crazy talk.
Unfortunately, this song has been covered by a variety of artists over the years and refuses to die. Speaking of dying, what happens when people are run over by a large woodland creature?
Annoying Christmas Song No. 2:
Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
What the audience is supposed to believe is that reindeer homicide is pretty funny. Unfortunately, "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" just comes off as annoying and awkward. Not only is the song repetitive, but also it paints a ghastly tale.
Apparently this grandma got drunk on eggnog, went off her medication, stumbled into the snow unnoticed and was involved in a hit-and-run involving deer and a careless and mean-spirited sleigh driver.
The song has a funny premise for a brief moment, and then it just gets irritating before becoming downright disturbing. It isn't clear how the death of a family member is supposed to be captured in a jolly holiday song, but this set of lyrics is a failure.
Of course, it could be a song where the singer expects to be given the entire world on Christmas morning.
Annoying Christmas Song No. 1:Santa Baby
Santa may be many things, but it is hard to picture him as anyone's "baby."Greed may be a reality in some circles and Christmas is a time when gifts are given. However, this song is about someone who expects to be given just about everything.
The audience is even led to believe that this is all deserved because of how "good" the singer has been, even though she seems to be buying favors into the future by promising to be good next year as well.
What finishes off this song is the way that so many singers present it, which is in a sort of sultry and enticing way. Again, this is not an image of Santa Claus that most people want to have, and this irritating song certainly does not seem to fit the Christmas spirit.
The Twelve Days After Christmas
(Frederick Silver)
(Not sung to the same tune as the other song!)
The first day after Christmas, my true love and I had a fight.
And so I chopped the pear tree down and burned it just for spite.
Then, with a single cartridge, I shot that blasted partridge,
That my true love, my true love gave to me.
The second day after Christmas, I pulled on the old rubber gloves
And very gently wrung the necks of both the turtle doves,
My true love, my true love, my true love gave to me.
The third day after Christmas, my mother caught the croup;
I had to use the three French hens to make some chicken soup.
The four calling birds were a big mistake,
For their language was obsence .
The five gold rings were completely fake
And they turned my fingers gree.
The sixth day after Christmas, the six laying geese wouldn’t lay:
I gave the whole darn gaggle to the ASPCA.
On the seventh day what a mess I found:
All seven of the swimming swans had drowned,
My true love, my true love, my true love gave to me.
The eighth day after Christmas, before they could suspect,
I bundled up the . . .
Eight maids a-milking,
Nine pipers piping,
Ten ladies dancing,
‘Leven lords a-leaping,
Twelve drummers drumming
(spoken) Well, actually I kept one of the drummers(girls)
Well, actually I kept one of the maids a-milking(boys)
And sent them back collect.
I wrote my true love, “We are through, love”
And I said in so many words,
“Furthermore your Christmas gifts were for the birds!”
(echo of “four calling birds, three french hens, two turtle doves
and a partridge in a pear tree.””
Never heard song #5. As for the rest, they’re a part of our Christmas “lighter” culture. If I don’t like a song I don’t listen to it. Simple as that. I don’t see the idea behind dwelling on something negative.
Easily, “Last Christmas” by WHAM!
If that gal from the Hyundai commercial sings any of those, I would have to give them my vote. I think she could make any song great. Who is she anyway?
Only five?
“Wonderful Christmas Time” not being on the list instantly reduces the authors credibility to zero.
Don’t know anything about the hippo song - and I agree about Grandma and the reindeer - but the others are fine. Santa Baby - I love it!
or, perhaps, by some unscrupulous hack who considered Christian listeners too stupid to know anything about babies and percussion instruments, if you just push their stuck-on-stupid sentimentality buttons!
Fingernails-on-chalkboard agony with every pa-rum-pa-pa-pum!
My nomination: “Last Christmas” by WHAM!, Savage Garden, or any other artist that does it.
I find the song annoying in the utmost. Especially hearing that fruit George Michael sing it. The instant it comes on, the channel gets changed or the radio goes off.
“Redneck Christmas” by the Greaseman is the funniest. Also, “Walkin Round in Womens Underwear”!
When I was a little kid my grandmother had some 78 and 45 records with Yogi Yorgesson singing various comedy songs. I had a number of favorites including one about Christmas (one part was about Papa getting drunk I think) but everyone in my immediate family along with friends hated these songs.
Haven’t heard any of these in years although I did find “Who hid the halibut on the poopdeck” on the web a few years ago.
Except those covered by chipmunks.
‘Santa Baby’ by Eartha Kitt is the best. Right up there is ‘Baby It’s Cold Outside’ by Dean Martin.
On a very happy note, my favorite Christmas song is Merry Christmas to the Family.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P37xPiRz1sg
“Easily, “Last Christmas” by WHAM!”
Well, you’ll be surprised by how many chicks fall for that song when the moment’s right (cough).
Mr Roboto is the worst Christmas song ........ ever!
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