Posted on 06/06/2010 11:02:24 AM PDT by JoeProBono
While the rest of you were busy asking friends to join your gang in MafiaWars or doing whatever it is you're supposed to do in Farmville, a mother in California was busy using Facebook for a good reason -- to track down her two children who had been kidnapped 15 years earlier.
According to the Deputy District Attorney in San Berardnio, CA, the father of the two children -- one boy and one girl -- had gone missing with the children in 1995 when the kids were just 2 and 3 years old.
"The mother got on to Facebook and typed in one of the children’s names and hit a Facebook page," said the prosecutor.
Lo and behold, the girl she'd found was indeed her daughter. The two began communicating via Facebook, with the mom even sending an old photo of the family from before the kidnapping. And then suddenly, says the Deputy D.A., it all came to an end: "The teenager said, 'Not interested in a relationship. We just have a happy life. Leave us alone,'" and her daughter's Facebook page disappeared from the site.
Even so, the mom was able to convince the local authorities to investigate. Ultimately, they tracked down the missing children and their father to Orlando, where daddy dearest was arrested and charged with two counts of kidnapping, and two counts of violating child custody orders.
(Excerpt) Read more at consumerist.com ...
Yes, I read it. He clearly broke the law. The mother didn’t.
Thank You: Thats exactly what I was saying. Before condemning this man we need more facts.
I believe he will end up doing jail time, and if he loves his kids as much as I think he does, he will consider it worth it.
This is not your religion forum and your personal moderator is not here to cover your backside. Take not of that fact and watch yourself. I will not let you turn this thread into you vs me. but i am not likely to let you use your “religion” as your shield either. Your brand of religion is about as respectable as that of the tree hugging whale worshippers’ version of religion. You should read Kagan’s words. You might find some things to your liking.
You’re talking over my head mccain style. Come back to earth so we can understand eachother.
he sounds like a loving dad who got screwed by a court that favors women to me.
That sounds like a conclusion to me. We don't know a thing about him, but you've concluded that he's a loving father. We don't know a thing about the divorce, but you've concluded that he wasn't treated fairly in court. C'mon.
Thats interesting kid...
You were the one who introduced the subject of religion into this thread unsolicited back in post # 14....
If you didnt want a discussion on religion, or a FReeper to answer you or object to your aspersions, or defend herself against your personal attacks, why did you even mention it in the first place ???
Should I have just pushed the abuse button ???
If this is not to be taken as a comment on religion, what did you mean when you said this ???
To: Tennessee Nana
whatever you say. sounds like you are a typical man hating dyke. not surprising your religious views I’ve seen lately. In fact, i’d say you don’t even have any true religious views, but only man hating views that spill over into religious topics.
39 posted on Sunday, June 06, 2010 4:43:42 PM by mamelukesabre (Si Vis Pacem Para Bellum (If you want peace prepare for war))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies | Report Abuse]
“Unless the mother is a crack whore married to a major drug dealer, the father is going to get screwed.”
Our neighbor’s brother got a girl pregnant during a one-night-stand. Turns out she has a problem with drugs, booze, men, etc. When the guy found out she was pregnant he offered to take the baby, but the mom (single) kept her.
She has been in and out of jail, homeless (sleeping at friends until she pisses them off), takes the baby to bars, or leaves her in an empty room while she goes out and parties, etc.
The guy went to court for custody, but the judge said forget about it. The guy had a state-provided lawyer that was no good, but we figured the evidence was so overwhelming against her. He was given the chance to appeal in August.
The guy never missed the chance for his weekend visits - even though it is about 600 miles roundtrip.
Turns out that recently one of the friends where the mom stayed called CPS for possible abuse on the baby on the mom. And shortly thereafter she got another drunk -driving charge and sent to jail. Because of the CPS and child-endangerment the guy went before another judge for an emergency custody hearing.
He was granted temporary custody. The retrial will be in August. The guy is now married and she seems like a great mom. The guy is a great guy too - just did something stupid. They both act like new parents should act, doting on their baby, fixing up the baby’s room, too many diapers stashed away! I sure hope he can keep custody when the trial comes. It seems like a nobrainer to me. Unless he gets the first judge!
I am sorry you had such a hard time in your childhood. I can tear up easily thinking about the children of divorce, kidnapping and abandonment. We hurt too many innocent souls with so much marital strife in our society.
It is painful reading this thread. Every injured soul sees life and men/dads and women/moms through their wounded experience of broken families.
Now imagine this hurt on a society wide level and it makes me so sad for all the pain and discord Americans suffer!
It's embarrassing, and quite disturbing that there are people like you on FR.
I haven’t concluded anything. I have only surmised. You have obviously surmised a different opinion. Let’s wait for some proof one wahy or the other.
It's more likely that the father discovered her communication with Mom and may have even threatened her to end it.
Most of the folk jumping into this discussion have genuine reasons for their strong feelings. I do understand the terrible effects of divorce, especially no-fault divorce.
My words were meant to bring some perspective to help close the circle on the reality of parental "kidnapping."
What real life is like for those caught in the middle; for those whose parent wishes to "save" or even to use to "punish" the spouse, by the other who feels "cheated" out of their home and family in a divorce.
Childhood and early adulthood was spent lonely and longing for a "real family," real intimacy and genuine trust that never came.
After spending decades being confused as to who I was and whether I really mattered, I was able to find Jesus Christ. Through Him, I've learned to forgive my dead father and now dead mother to live a life of abundance and true meaning.
On the outside, the child may say they do not want to be with the mother, even though the child KNOWS they will be harmed physically, spiritually, and/or emotionally.
There is a connectedness to a mother that a child can never replace. The child will do whatever it takes to be with them, especially denying their core characteristics.
Why did you say you wanted to be with your father?
Wow, that's just an incredibly sad statement. In all seriousness and no malice, you should seek therapy. That's a horrible way to go through life.
Oh yes, you belong to Jesus and you can not beat the love and safety of that family! God Bless you.
>>>> You are blinded by your own agenda.
ROFLOL. Bullshit.
>>>> I know that dads have been ripped off by courts
To the tune of about 90% of them. MAJOR, RAMPANT DISCRIMINATION. Why don’t you speak up about it.
>>> blind to the fact that there are very bad women who abuse, neglect, and yes, even sexually abuse their own children.
Yep.
>>> However, the statistics are overwhelming.
No, they are not. You need to review that report with a more seasoned eye.
Those ‘naughty teachers’ we are just now reading about are surfacing, not because women just started sexually abusing children, but because changes in society have finally stopped ignoring this bad behavior.
Even this report is forced to admit this:
>>> Although the vast majority of attention on sex crimes
>>> focuses on men as the offenders, an increased
>>> awareness of females as sex offenders has surfaced
>>> in recent years. Highly publicized cases involving
>>> inappropriate and illegal sexual contact between
>>> female high school teachers and their male students
>>> are a primary source of this growing attention
You are looking at statistics for laws that are specifically designed against men. They have not included the types of crimes that women commit in their analysis.
>>>> One cannot dismiss the most obvious and you are doing that.
Why don’t you start by looking at the other side of the issue. False claims of rape by women are a weapon that they use against men. See for example:
http://www.innocenceproject.org/
I am sorry your father was a jerk.
However, the behavior your describe is most commonly committed by women.
>>> So much for corruption in the family courts all biased against men.
So much? 90+% of all men are denied custody. That is the fact of the matter.
>>> I have something to tell you. I have an ex-husband who
>>> hasn’t seen our daughter in years. We don’t even know
>>> where he is. At the time we got divorced in 2005, I
>>> hadn’t seen him in 4 years. I went for custody due to
>>> abandonment and he was awarded joint custody, supposed
>>> to visit her every month for a year to establish a
>>> relationship.
So, I have a brother that married a lady that has a true deadbeat dad. Big deal. There are a few bad dads out there.
As for the alleged ‘joint custody’ - that is a joke. In Louisiana, that means the custodial parent decides everything and the other parent can go cry to the judge - if he can afford the legal bill.
>>> That lasted for 4 months and then he disappeared.
>>> You would think someone in the military is easy to
>>> find but if that person doesn’t want to be found,
>>> even the military won’t help. He hasn’t seen her in
>>> years.
Rubbish. People are easy to find. It is not the militaries job to find them.
>>> On July 9, she will be 13. She will not have had a
>>> birthday card from him in 3 years. He knows where we
>>> are, I had an Army chaplain forward the information to
>>> him years ago and that is all he would do.
Years ago? Years ago? He has probably long since lost that information.
>>> E-mails sent to him asking him if he’s going to call
>>> her on her birthday don’t get kicked back but they
>>> don’t get answered either. She is an award-winning
>>> honor student.
Many kids in single mom situations end up badly in life. The damage from the divorce shows up when they try to form relationships.
>>> Am I a failure or a bad mother? Hell no!
Yes.
>>> My life is twice as hard as a single parent and I have
>>> a son whose dad died in 1997 when he was 3. No dad for
>>> either of them but we are happy.
Hmmm
>>> Nevertheless, every year I place a letter in the file
>>> of the last court we were in to update them on where we
>>> are, what we are doing and the last time I heard from
>>> him. This way, he can’t say he doesn’t know anything.
Oh please, that is the last place he would look.
>>> He can hire his old lawyer to look in the file.
Not bloody likely. Why would someone hire someone who sold them out?
>>> I am not and never have kept her from him.
Sigh, no the courts did that for you. Right?
>>> His family never contacts us.
It is your job to contact them.
>>> She has a Facebook page but never gets his from him
>>> or anyone in his family.
Have you bothered inviting them.
>>> They never even look for her.
You are assuming that.
>>> It has hurt her over the years.
Yes, it has hurt her more deeply than you know. It will show up when she tries to form relationships.
>>> First the abandonment when we were still married
>>> and now this.
Okay.
>>> It is in no way my fault,
That is a claim. I am not sure about that.
>>> I have taken the responsibility of my kids alone
>>> and would never do it any other way.
I see, no other way will do. Right.
>>> My daughters father doesn’t even answer the e-mails
>>> that I am in failing health with a bad heart for
>>> years now. Still I work full-time to provide most of
>>> the time going to work ill.
Ah, you poor martyr.
Build the (bleeping) relationship with the full family and spare us the sob story.
>>> I pass no judgement on the mother. Her daughter was
>>> too young to develop the disdain for her mother she
>>> has now. She has zero frame of reference. That means
>>> the father has badmouthed the mother. You don’t need
>>> any more “proof” than that. How about you looking at
>>> the fact that the kids suffered shock and trauma from
>>> the abrupt separation? Didn’t think about that, did you
>>> smartypants?
Yes, I did. Did you think about the shock and trauma that most judges inflict on children every day?
It is time to end the social experiment with divorce on demand.
It is time to end the abusive courts.
It is easy to play the good cop role when you have an entire state apparatus with thousands of willing bad cops to do the dirty work.
What have I been up to?
Lets see, I have stopped the horrible UCAPA legislation in about 8 states now... What have you done? Nothing I’ll bet. Don’t worry, they are not likely to accuse you of being a ‘potential abductor’ for a few more years or perhaps a decade or to. But they will certainly get your children or their spouses.
Lets see, I’ve tried to reform the state child support laws so that the state can’t demand 100% of a persons income, but for some reason, none of the legislators want to even admit that is a problem. Hmmm. What you done lately?
Lets see, I’ve tried to make the laws better so that dads don’t get chased away out of their children’s lives - much as yours was. Not having much success with that either. It seems the states prefer dysfunctional families - the lawyers make much more money that way.
Oh well, I am sure your children will thank you for the coming dictatorship... NOT.
Please do not use profane language to me. I don’t know what happened to you but you are ignoring the basic reality that men are sexual abusers far more than women. It is not even a small percentage. It is enormous. I will not respond to any of your posts b/c I really don’t need to read that kind of language. I hear enough of it in the world as it is and I consider that abuse as well.
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