Posted on 11/30/2009 8:05:56 PM PST by canuck_conservative
Dear Eldrick:
First, sorry to hear about the second most famous “crash” last week. (I’m sure in retrospect, you wish you were with those other “crashers” at the White House, rather than being eased out of your Escalade at 2 in the morning.)
Second, I know you and the lovely Elin have been ducking the local fuzz in terms of elaborating on what happened and you tried to extinguish the fire with yesterday’s half-baked statement but...
Third, as much as you don’t want to hear it, your only choice now is to take the “penalty stroke” and fess up about what happened -- maybe not “all” of it, but at least, “much” of it.
Frankly, the statement your released yesterday expressing that “This is a private matter, and I want to keep it that way,” is a non-starter. Alas, there is nothing “private” about what you do. That’s the price you pay for who you are.
As any even casual viewer of cable news knows by now, when a celebrity hits the wall (in your case, literally!), there is no alternative but to get the bad news out.
Michael Phelps, Kobe Bryant and Michael Vick did, and they lived to score another day. Martha Stewart and Mel Gibson didn’t, and they never fully recovered. And it took Michael Richards three years and a Larry David "Seinfeld" comeback to begin to clear his name. And as to the late lamented Latin lothario Governor Mark Sanford from South Carolina, don’t even ask.
So, my friend, as much as you value your privacy and as distasteful as the reality of this awfulness is, you really have no choice.
With apologies, here is the crisis management mantra to which you must abide:
#1. Go Public
You can’t not. Those TV trucks outside ....
(Excerpt) Read more at foxnews.com ...
Anybody can make up a rumor, you did really well, now slide on back over to DU.
No he shouldn’t. What the hell is he going to say that will make it stop? Seriously, do you REALLY believe that TMZ will quit no matter what he says. HELL NO
Manning up in my book means NOT talking about your personal problems to cops.
Right on the money.
Big deal. I’m sure he can pay it off himself.
Which part of that rant involved public works property?
I don't know what world you live in, but if you ever go through a divorce, and have kids, you'll understand.
My are’t you sensitive. The 5 critical PR moves are crap.
He doesn’t have to talk to “the public” or the media crows anymore than he has to talk to the cops.
He can just keep golfing and ignore the media. They need him, he doesn’t need them to keep winning at golf. And as long as he continues to play well and win frequently, they’ll have to drop their crap questions if they want interviews. Make them stick to his sports performance, private life is off limits.
Chill out, drama queen.
Encouraging Americans to know their rights and to exercise them is not an act of cop hatred.
In the extremely unlikely event that I am confronted by a gangmember, I will explain to the responding officer that I was in fear of my life when I shot the assailant repeatedly and that I have nothing further to say without the advice of counsel.
I suggest you do the same.
What part of I have a hundred million dollars plus, plus, plus, and don’t worry about your silly fire hydrant do you not understand, I believe the Mayor has all the faith in the world that his bill will be paid upon presentation. If not he can put a lien on that 100 dollar house.
It never ceases to amaze me, the number of people who don’t understand Public Relations, or why they are necessary.
If you’ve got a cancer, do you ignore it, thinking it will go away? Apparently, you think that’s a good approach.
Keeping his fly zipped would be a start...
As long as he continues to hit inanimate objects and take his pills, he’s is fine.
When he hits another vehicle- then we can cap him.
Back that up, and you may win the 2010 Nobel Peace Prize...loser.
The golfer guy shows a propensity to be a danger to the public. What if a young child had been run over? Do you take the same position?
Org.whodat is off his meds tonight.
It’s a loaded question.
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