Posted on 07/27/2007 5:56:08 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Happy Friday to you!!
Happy Friday!!!
School is still a month off. Why the hell are you jumping the gun?
Official Friday Silliness Thread
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It starts next week for kids where I’m at...and in 2 weeks for my step-son in IN....
College Graduate
A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.”
“But I’m a college graduate!!” the young man replied indignantly.
“Oh, I’m sorry about the misunderstanding,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom - I’ll show you how.”
Top ten!!!!
An amazing elephant story...
I don’t usually like these heartwarming stories, but this one is truly interesting...
In 1986, Mkele Mbembe was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Mbembe approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant’s foot and found a large
piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Mbembe worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Mbembe stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Mbembe never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.
Twenty years later, Mbembe was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son.
As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mbembe and his son Tapu were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mbembe, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man. Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mbembe couldn’t help wondering if this was the same elephant. Mbembe summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mbembe’ s legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly .
Probably wasn’t the same elephant.
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Glad this week is wrapping up!
Three surgeons were bragging in a posh bar.
First Surgeon:
“A concert pianist lost seven fingers in an accident, I reattached them, and months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England.”
The second surgeon said. “That’s nothing. A young man lost an arm and both legs in an accident, I reattached them, and 2 years later he won a gold medal in track and field events in the Olympics.
“The third surgeon said, “You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a
woman was high on cocaine and marijuana and she rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the woman’s blonde hair and the horse’s ass. I was able to put them together and now she’s running for President.
Proudly, his dad let's his son "struggle" a little bit, learning a valuable lesson of life. However, after a few months of not hearing from the boy, the dad calls to check up on junior.
"Son?", asks the dad, "Is there anything you need?"
Struggling a bit with college science lab costs the boy replies, "Well, I could use $5 for a guinea pig."
The dad replies, "Son! Why don't you get yourself a nice Jewish girl instead!!!"
Obligatory graphic.
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