Life is meant to be lived.
Posted on 09/15/2006 2:12:28 AM PDT by sully777
IOTP
And the award for understatement of the day goes to...
I learned to type from my good FRiend Fierce Allegiance
Thank God I didn't learn lawn mowing from Hottie
You ole' meanie >:>
Why Dogs Are Better Than Women
* ... Dogs love it when your friends visit.
* ... Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.
* ... Dogs enjoy the way you sing.
* ... A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
* ... Dogs don't expect you to call when you're running late.
* ... The later you are - the more excited the dog is to see you.
* ... Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
* ... Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
* ... Dogs appreciate excessive body hair.
* ... If a dog is beautiful - all the other dogs don't hate her.
* ... Dogs don't shop.
* ... Dogs love it when you leave stuff all other the floor.
* ... A dog's disposition doesn't change every 28 days.
* ... Dogs never need to re-examine your relationship.
* ... A Dog's parents never come for the weekend.
* ... Dogs love long car trips.
* ... Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
* ... Dogs don't hate their bodies.
* ... No dog ever bought a Kenny G or Yanni album.
* ... Dogs never nag.
* ... Dogs don't expect gifts for every occassion.
* ... Dogs don't worry about germs.
* ... Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your wallet, coat pocket, glove compartment, or the back of your underwear drawer.
* ... Dogs don't let talk shows, horoscopes, and tabloids guide their lives.
* ... Dogs prefer hamburger over lobster.
* ... You never have to wait for a dog to decide what to wear - they are always ready to go on a moments notice.
* ... Dogs have no use for floers, candy, cards, or jewelry.
* ... Dogs don't borrow your shirts.
* ... Dogs don't lend your best tools to the neighbors.
* ... Dogs don't put dents in your fenders.
THINGS YOU probably don't KNOW BUT PROBABLY have no need to know, but might find interesting.
1. Money isn't made out of paper, it's made out of cotton.
2. The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper.
3. The dot over the letter I is called a "tittle".
4. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.
(75% OF YOU WILL TEST THIS ONE)
5. Susan Lucci is the daughter of Phyllis Diller.
6. 40% of McDonald's profits come from the sales of Happy Meals.
7. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 Dictionary were misspelled.
8. The 'spot' on 7UP comes from its inventor, who had red eyes. He was albino.
9. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents, daily.
10. Warren Beatty and Shirley MacLaine are brother and sister
11. Chocolate affects a dog's heart and nervous system--a few ounces will kill a small sized dog.
12. Orcas (killer whales) kill sharks by torpedoing up into the shark's stomach from underneath, causing the shark to explode.
13. Most lipstick contains fish scales (eeww).
14. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
15. Ketchup was sold in the 1830's as medicine. (Some of us doctor-up eggs with Catsup even today)
16. Upper and lower case letters are named 'upper' and 'lower' because in the time when all original print had to be set in individual letters, the 'upper case' letters were stored in the case on top of the case that stored the smaller, 'lower case' letters.
17. Leonardo da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time ... hence, multi-tasking was invented.
18. Because metal was scarce, the Oscars given out during World War II were made of wood.
19. There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos.
20. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan; there was never a recorded Wendy before!
21. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with: orange, purple, and silver!
22. Leonardo Da Vinci invented scissors. Also, it took him 10 years to paint Mona Lisa's lips.
23. A tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion will make it instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
24. The mask used by Michael Myers in the original "Halloween" was a Captain Kirk mask painted white.
25. If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar (good to know.)
26. By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you can't sink in quicksand ( and you thought this list was completely useless.)
27. The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law, which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.
28. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles. At that time, the most known player on the market was the Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.
29. Celery has negative calories! It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with. It's the same with apples!
30. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying!
31. The glue on Israeli postage stamps is certified kosher.
32. Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from public libraries.
33. Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a space suit damages it.
You set one on the tee like that... how can I not swing?
 |
You scored as Sniper Rifle. You like sharpshooting. Stealth, accuracy and range are your best friends. So you need sniper rifle (if you don't already have one).
|
O RLY?
LOL
True,
And you're so nice, normal and cute,
I can't think of a zinger to throw back at ya :)
So what you're saying is when you're riding her ass you should give it a few smitings?
Not exactly material for a "family friendly" forum.
Que your avatar
And to be fair, here's the ladies version....
Why Dogs Are Better Than Men
* ... Dogs don't have trouble expressing affection in public.
* ... Dogs miss you when you're gone.
* ... You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.
* .. Dogs don't brag about whom they've slept with.
* ... Dogs don't criticize your friends.
* ... Dogs admit it when they're jealous.
* ... Dogs don't play games with you - except fetch - and they never laugh at the way you throw the ball.
* ... Dogs are happy with any video that you rent. They always remember that the most important thing is that you are together.
* ... Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
* ... You can take a dog to a groomer.
* ... Dogs are already in touch with their inner feelings.
* ... You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.
* ... Gorgeous dogs don't know they are gorgeous.
* ... Dogs understand what"No" means.
* ... Dogs don't need therapy.
* ... Dogs understand if some of their friends can't come inside.
* ... Dogs think you are a culinary genius.
* ... You can housetrain a dog.
* ... You can force a dog to take a bath.
* ... Dogs don't correct your stories.
* ... Middle aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.
* ... Dogs admit it when they are lost.
* ... Dogs don't criticize your driving.
* ... Dogs don't weigh down your purse with their stuff.
* ... Dogs are nice to your relatives.
* ... Dogs mean it when they kiss you.
* ... Dogs can entertain themselves for longer than two minutes.
* ... Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.
* ... Dogs don't care whether you shave your legs.
* ... Dogs don't complain if the sink is full of dirty dishes.
* ... YOU CAN TRAIN A DOG!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.