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Operation removes lightbulb from Mohammed's anus
Reuters ^
Posted on 06/29/2006 5:22:19 AM PDT by Diggler
MULTAN, Pakistan (Reuters) - Fateh Mohammad, a prison inmate in Pakistan, says he woke up last weekend with a glass lightbulb in his anus.
Wednesday night, doctors brought Mohammad's misery to an end after a one-and-a-half hour operation to remove the object.
"Thanks Allah, now I feel comfort. Today, I had my breakfast. I was just drinking water, nothing else," Mohammad, a grey-beared man in his mid-40s, told Reuters from a hospital bed in the southern central city of Multan.
"We had to take it out intact," said Dr. Farrukh Aftab at Nishtar Hospital. "Had it been broken inside, it would be a very very complicated situation."
Mohammad, who is serving a four-year sentence for making liquor, prohibited for Muslims, said he was shocked when he was first told the cause of his discomfort. He swears he didn't know the bulb was there.
"When I woke up I felt a pain in my lower abdomen, but later in hospital, they told me this," Mohammad said.
"I don't know who did this to me. Police or other prisoners."
The doctor treating Mohammad said he'd never encountered anything like it before, and doubted the felon's story that someone had drugged him and inserted the bulb while he was comatose.
TOPICS: Humor; Miscellaneous; Religion; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: assman; islam; lightbulbs; mohammad; rop
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Crazy kids.
1
posted on
06/29/2006 5:22:20 AM PDT
by
Diggler
To: Diggler
One to hold the lightbulb, and three to rotate Mohammed.
2
posted on
06/29/2006 5:24:38 AM PDT
by
atomicpossum
(Replies must follow approved guidelines or you will be kill-filed without appeal.)
To: Diggler
I guess Mohammed doesn't have a place where the sun doesn't shine to put his head afterall.
3
posted on
06/29/2006 5:25:45 AM PDT
by
x1stcav
(A Racist is a Conservative winning an argument with a Liberal.)
To: Diggler
Operation removes lightbulb from Mohammed's anusI nominate that for Headline Of The Day.
"I don't know who did this to me. Police or other prisoners."
Oh, he knows. He just isn't telling.
4
posted on
06/29/2006 5:26:37 AM PDT
by
csvset
("It was like the hand of G_d slapping down and smashing everything." ~ JDAM strikes Taliban)
To: Diggler
Thanks to Mohammad we now know how to determine when a Muslim comes up with 1 of their a-hole ideas.
5
posted on
06/29/2006 5:26:59 AM PDT
by
hflynn
( Soros wouldn't make any sense even if he spelled his name backwards)
To: Diggler
"It was a million-to-one shot, doc! A million-to-one!"
6
posted on
06/29/2006 5:27:14 AM PDT
by
wideawake
("The nation which forgets its defenders will itself be forgotten." - Calvin Coolidge)
To: wideawake; Straight Vermonter; Cap Huff; Dog
7
posted on
06/29/2006 5:28:15 AM PDT
by
Coop
(No, there are no @!%$&#*! polls on Irey vs. Murtha!)
To: Diggler
No! I said I wanted a BUD lite.
To: Coop
9
posted on
06/29/2006 5:30:36 AM PDT
by
Dog
(The founders gave freedom of the press to the people, they didn't give freedom to the press.)
To: Diggler
When his cheeks close, does the light turn off?
10
posted on
06/29/2006 5:31:14 AM PDT
by
theDentist
(Qwerty ergo typo : I type, therefore I misspelll.)
To: theDentist
11
posted on
06/29/2006 5:32:49 AM PDT
by
gov_bean_ counter
(There are only a few absolute truths in life, the rest are just opinion.)
To: Diggler; Admin Moderator
12
posted on
06/29/2006 5:33:59 AM PDT
by
sageb1
(This is the Final Crusade. There are only 2 sides. Pick one.)
To: Diggler
He must be a sound sleeper.
To: Diggler
ROP person, boredom, Pakistan, accepted perversion in his culture, mental derangement, looking for virgins??? Which is it?? Or is it a combination of something? Or was he just trying to come up with a better idea, as another poster put it. Well, guess he'll have no objects in his cell anymore. Didn't know how? Yeah, right.
14
posted on
06/29/2006 5:35:18 AM PDT
by
RSmithOpt
(Liberalism: Highway to Hell)
To: Diggler
I love how Reuters needs to show us what a light bulb looks like.
15
posted on
06/29/2006 5:35:22 AM PDT
by
satchmodog9
(Most people stand on the tracks and never even hear the train coming)
To: gov_bean_ counter
16
posted on
06/29/2006 5:36:08 AM PDT
by
RSmithOpt
(Liberalism: Highway to Hell)
To: Diggler
To: Diggler
When I read the title, I looked to see if it was from Scrappleface.
18
posted on
06/29/2006 6:06:08 AM PDT
by
processing please hold
(If you can't stand behind our military, stand in front of them.)
To: martin_fierro
19
posted on
06/29/2006 6:07:12 AM PDT
by
processing please hold
(If you can't stand behind our military, stand in front of them.)
To: Diggler
One sect of this CULT says the new prophet will be born by a man.
They examine their feces for lumps to see if it is their new prophet.
Maybe he was a member and was just trying to put a little light on their new prophet?
20
posted on
06/29/2006 6:12:39 AM PDT
by
HuntsvilleTxVeteran
("Remember the Alamo, Goliad and WACO, It is Time for a new San Jacinto")
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