Posted on 04/18/2006 2:27:46 AM PDT by Chairman_December_19th_Society
We will not tire, we will not falter, and we will not fail!
Good morning!!
Do not let the victims of the attacks on New York and Washington, nor the brave members of our Nation's military who have given their lives to protect our freedom, die in vain!!
Will be packing today for vacation, and for the next few days we will have guest ranters. For today, however, I'd thought I'd leave you with some humor to get things rolling...
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Actual occurrences at an otherwise unnamed airline ticket office in Washington, DC:
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1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
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2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts," Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly! explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa," Her response - click.
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3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!"
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4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."
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5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time."
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6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
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7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!" After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it (I was laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.
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8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California, and then take the train to Hawaii?"
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9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them."
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10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, Fl. on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever, smarty!"
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11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!"
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12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?"replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal".
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Thus, the state of our Government.
For AMERICA - The Right Way, I remain yours in the Cause, the Chairman.
LOL!
Thanks, Dog! That was a great read, and I recommend everyone go to that link.
What a great uplifting story. Thank you.
I got a kick out of the grocery store..and the Kurd version of WalMart...:-)
Sweet dreams, lysie!
My sis-in-law works at LLBean, and she just told me they sell clothes that help repel bugs. Repellent lasts for about 20 washings.
Glory be. What next?
Thinking of you and praying for Miss Lily.
(((((Bev)))))
Those kids sounded a little naieve, but told a good story, and that is what real journalism is about. And they didn't have to go to a Kinko's....
/johnny
Hope things are getting better there. Don't want you to be stuck in Sweden for too long!
You find the neatest articles, Dog. Thanks.
Dinner sounds good, Johnny. Kitties behaving?
G'night Lysie. I got my lilies all planted, have fed the men and have the dishes soaking in the sink.
I need to get my clothes ready to take back in the morning, just in case I have to stay over tomorrow.
Water is back on, with some sand and rust in it.... but missed my window for washing dishes tonight. So the dishes will sit until morning. 8>)
/johnny
/johnny
Tony Snow has been offered Scott McClellan's job in the WH and is considering it!!!
http://freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/1617381/posts
Hopefully you have other identification on your person, to tell who you are. Where are you? If in France, I can well understand the tiny fingers that invade pockets, open bags and purses. I've watched the little buggers in action in Paris and they are very good. They almost got my purse one time.
I enjoy reading his adventures. He writes what he sees and people he's met. It's uplifting to hear about the northern Kurds and the progress they have and are making.
Thank you Dog for putting it up for us.
>>My former company had an 'expediter' that apparently knew everyone in the world
That would be my ADMIN.....she's already emailed me a scanned copy of the passport
BTW if you need it we can have Johnny bake you a cake and we will put a file in it...to spring you from that hellish Swedish prison..
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