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What your car says about you
NyCap ^ | 12/04 | staff

Posted on 05/08/2005 8:12:28 AM PDT by pissant

Acura Legend: I have always yearned to own the Buick of sports cars

Acura Vigor: I wanted a Legend, but couldn't afford one

Audi 90: I enjoy extinguishing engine fires

BMW 318i: I love my father, whose girlfriend is my age

BMW M3: I am practical with a huge debt

Buick Grand National: I buy four new tires a week

Buick Park Avenue : I am older than 34 of the 50 states

Cadillac Fleetwood: I'm driving myself to the cemetary

Cadillac Eldorado: I'm the saleswoman of the month for Mary Kay cosmetics

Cadillac Seville: I'm a hairy-chested pimp with a fat gold chain

Chevrolet Camaro: I enjoy beating people up to compensate for my inadequacies

Chevrolet Chevette: I love to see peoples' reactions when I tell them I drive a 'Vette

Chevrolet Corvette: I'm going through a mid-life crisis

Chevrolet El Camino: I'm leading a militia to overthrow our overbearing government

Chrysler Cordoba: I dig the rich Corinthian leather

Chevrolet Lumina: Well, it was time for a new lease and the Dodge Stratus just wasn't for me

Datsun 280Z: I've got a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well

Dodge Dart: I teach 3rd grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower

Dodge Daytona: I delivered pizzas for 4 years to pay for this car

Dodge Stealth: I like this body style, but couldn't afford it as a Mistubishi 3000GT

Dodge Stratus: Well, it was time for a new lease and the Chevy Lumina just wasn't for me

Ford Bronco: I purchased this car during the Simpson trial, with the expectation that it would appreciate in value when he was found guilty

Ford Crown Victoria: I get a kick out of pulling up right behind people and watching them slow down to below the speed limit and sweat bullets until I turn off

Ford Explorer: I'm a yuppie whose meaning of off-roading is setting down my cell phone to negotiate a construction cone

Ford Expedition: As a red-blooded American, I feel obligated to consume as much fossil fuel as is humanly possible during my relatively brief and insignificant lifespan on this planet

Ford Excursion I was going to buy a Ford Expedition, but it's double-digit gas mileage just wasn't for me

Ford Fairmont: (See Dodge Dart)

Ford Mustang : I love to peel out while my teenage buddies cackle like idiots in the back seat

Ford Probe: I can't afford a real sports car

Ford Windstar: I have four children, all of whom play soccer

Geo Storm: I will start the 11th grade in the fall

Geo Tracker: I will start the 12th grade in the fall

Honda Accord: I lack any originality and am basically a lemming

Honda Civic: Gosh, with some stiff, low suspension, alloy wheels and a big chrome exhaust pipe, I've got a few people convinced this car is actually FAST

Honda Del Sol: I have always said that half a convertible is better than no convertible at all

Honda Element: I'm trying to cling to the fond memories of my childhood when I used to "drive" a cardboard refrigerator box

Hyundai Accent: I wanted a new car, but only had enough money for a used car

Infiniti G20: I'm pretending to be rich

Infiniti Q45 : I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending

Isuzu Impulse: I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports

Jaguar XJ6: I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year

Kia Sephia: I learned nothing from the failure of the Diahatsu Corporation

Lincoln Town Car: I live for Bingo and covered dish suppers

Mazda 323: I only drive to get somewhere

Mazda 626: I only drive to get somewhere, but decided I wanted to spoil myself

Mercury Grand Marquis: My blue-haired wife insists I drive this speed, lest my become aggravated

Mercedes 500SL: I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph

Mazda Miata: I do not fear being decapitated by an 18-wheeler

MGB: I am dating a mechanic

Mitsubishi 3000GT: I'm a rich pasty white guy who wears wrap-around sunglasses

Mitsubishi Diamante: I don't know what it means either

Mitsubishi Eclipse: I bought it because car with a spoiler this size has got to be the end-all, be-all of contemporary sports cars

Nissan 300ZX: I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings

Nissan Maxima: This car looked really stupid until I tinted the windows, installed fake chrome hubcaps, and put a couple of crown air fresheners in the rear window

Oldmobile Cutlass: I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

Peugeot 505 Diesel: I am on the EPA's "Ten Most Wanted" List

Plymouth Neon: I'm incessantly bubbly and enjoy doing the macarena

Pontiac Fiero: I wanted to challenge my patience and mechanical ability by purchasing a car that needs its engine dropped to change the spark plugs

Pontiac Trans Am: I have a switchblade in my sock

Porsche 944: I am dating big-haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me

Rolls Royce Silver Shadow: With all of this grandeur, Grey Poupon is a must

Saturn SL: I was in the market for a cheap plastic car outfitted with an anemic powertrain whose engine tolerances are larger than the Grand Canyon

Saturn SC: I wanted to own a plastic car, and a Saturn SL was out of my price range

Subaru Legacy: I have always wanted a Japanese car even more than common sense

Toyota Camry: I am still in the closet

Volkswagen Beetle: I still watch Partridge Family reruns

Volkswagen Cabriolet: I am out of the closet

Volkswagen Golf: I'm an opinionated college kid who basically bought this car to use as a billboard for all of my wacky bumper stickers

Volkswagen Jetta: I'm a single blonde in my twenties (of course the sunglasses are designer!)

Volkswagen Microbus: My most cherished possessions besides this car are my tie-dyed T-shirt, roach clip, and a tarnished 8x10 glossy of Jerry Garcia

Volvo 240 Sedan: I voted for Gore, and am a member of the Sierra Club

Volvo 740 Wagon : I am frightened of my wife

Volvo 740 Turbo Wagon: I am only somewhat frightened of my wife


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: autos; zoom
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To: MikeinIraq

I hope its a girl too. If not, he's gonna get beat up.


61 posted on 05/08/2005 10:43:01 AM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: pissant

The "Datsun 280ZX"? It's just been updated with a few new entries.


62 posted on 05/08/2005 10:44:53 AM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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To: pissant

yeah...

I think its a girl, but I dont really care enough to find out...

what would a Chevy S-10 fall under?


63 posted on 05/08/2005 10:45:09 AM PDT by MikefromOhio (I joined the EEEVVIILLLL Sam's Club on Friday, April 22nd, 2005.....)
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To: MikeinIraq

Are you sure it's an S10 and not an S15? They actually made a special edition S15 called the Cameo.


64 posted on 05/08/2005 10:45:50 AM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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To: Spktyr

it looks like an S-10 but its been modified...

I havent been close enough to look honestly, but you notice hot pink trucks going by as you mow the lawn....


65 posted on 05/08/2005 10:46:29 AM PDT by MikefromOhio (I joined the EEEVVIILLLL Sam's Club on Friday, April 22nd, 2005.....)
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To: MikeinIraq

"likes to work on truck", I think.


66 posted on 05/08/2005 10:46:34 AM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: pissant

in that case, if its a guy, hes gotta be gay, and if its a chick, she has amazing potential LOL


67 posted on 05/08/2005 10:47:31 AM PDT by MikefromOhio (I joined the EEEVVIILLLL Sam's Club on Friday, April 22nd, 2005.....)
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To: Dan from Michigan

That was you behind me in the CV? You son of a #%*!. ;o)


68 posted on 05/08/2005 10:48:20 AM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: MikeinIraq

The reason I ask is because the Cameo was pink, and almost none of them sold. There are actually collectors who will pay money for one.


69 posted on 05/08/2005 10:48:48 AM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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To: Spktyr

dont know...

I am pretty sure the hood isnt original, it has (what are they called) an Air thing on the hood...I cant for the life of me remember the name of it....


70 posted on 05/08/2005 10:50:39 AM PDT by MikefromOhio (I joined the EEEVVIILLLL Sam's Club on Friday, April 22nd, 2005.....)
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To: MikeinIraq

A hood scoop?


71 posted on 05/08/2005 10:52:10 AM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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To: pissant
According to this, I'm a Yuppie living in the city. That couldn't be farther from the truth. I'm a country girl who actually lives in the country, and I drive a Ford Explorer. When I lived in the city I drove a Porsche and a Corvette, but I was still a country 'bumpkin.' LOL :)
72 posted on 05/08/2005 10:58:22 AM PDT by NRA2BFree (Hosea 4:6 My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge ..)
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To: pissant
Funny post pissant.

These are hilarious. Best laugh I've had in a while.

I'll start with this one.

Honda Element: I'm trying to cling to the fond memories of my childhood when I used to "drive" a cardboard refrigerator box


73 posted on 05/08/2005 10:58:34 AM PDT by MotleyGirl70
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To: pissant
Oldmobile Cutlass: I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

I had an OC, a white one (and no I didn't hotwire it). Good thing I had The Club for it though. If anything The Club was a good visual deterant for those car thieves thinking about stealing my ride ;)

74 posted on 05/08/2005 11:08:52 AM PDT by MotleyGirl70
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To: pissant

bump


75 posted on 05/08/2005 11:13:31 AM PDT by Badray (If you don't want to change your mind, at least get some more info and make a new decision.)
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To: pissant
Hyundai Sonata V6: Still too poor to afford a Lexus.

(This is my car, btw).

76 posted on 05/08/2005 11:15:33 AM PDT by Clemenza (I am NOT A NUMBER, I am a FREE MAN!!!)
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To: pissant
Ford Explorer: I'm a yuppie whose meaning of off-roading is setting down my cell phone to negotiate a construction cone

More like, I finally have a large enough vehicle to carry all of the ham radios and other gear I want with me while chasing thunderstorms/tornadoes.

77 posted on 05/08/2005 11:21:23 AM PDT by Professional Engineer ("Republican politican" ~ old North American term meaning eunuck.)
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To: MotleyGirl70

No, you just got lucky. It only takes about 15 seconds to defeat "The Club" and another 10 to pop the GM ignition lock out and start the car.


78 posted on 05/08/2005 11:24:21 AM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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To: pissant

Looks a WHOLE LOT like this:

FYI...Check out the rims on the pope mobile!
Who pimped his ride?

79 posted on 05/08/2005 11:30:08 AM PDT by Dashing Dasher (Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.)
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To: pissant
standard cop issue, I assume.

In our neck of the woods anyway.

80 posted on 05/08/2005 11:50:29 AM PDT by Horatio Gates (If the thought of Hillary as prez doesn't make your skin crawl, it's on too tight.)
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