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Secretary Noem Touts "Operation Dirtbag" [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 16 November 2025 | John Semmens

Posted on 11/17/2025 9:48:41 AM PST by John Semmens

Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem announced that efforts to nab illegal alien sex offenders have resulted in the apprehension of 230 foreigners accused of a variety of crimes including child molestation, sexual assault, drug offenses and murder.

"This operation was called Operation Criminal Return," Noem said. "But I call it Operation Dirtbag because the specific targeted individuals are sex offenders, many of whose victims were children. These individuals should have never been in our country to begin with. These individuals will be gone off of our streets and kids will be safer."

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass) objected, saying "Noem is rushing to judgment. These are accused, not convicted criminals. They should be allowed to remain free while awaiting trial. President Biden's policy was to let them go free as long as they promised to regularly check in with the smart phones he gave them. In Chicago, US District Judge Jeffrey Cummings just ordered the 3,000 immigrants arrested by ICE in 'Operation Midway Blitz' to be set free."

Illinois Gov. JB Pritzker (D) hailed the "set free order" and called President Trump "demented for targeting our City in the first place."

Noem criticized Pritzker's "personal attacks that are putting the citizens of Chicago in jeopardy. A byproduct of the ICE enforcement action has been a 41% decline in robberies and a 35% drop in shootings. We hope to replicate these kinds of results in other so-called sanctuary cities and states."


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics; Travel
KEYWORDS: crime; ice; pritzker; satire

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1 posted on 11/17/2025 9:48:41 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Her videos are interesting to me. For some reason I like watching her.


2 posted on 11/17/2025 11:07:45 AM PST by bicyclerepair
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