Posted on 10/26/2024 3:30:52 PM PDT by DFG
While other fake news organizations like the Washington Post and L.A. Times refuse to save democracy, we at the Babylon Bee are proud to do our part. Today, the esteemed Editorial Board of the Babylon Bee has officially voted to endorse Kamala Harris for President.
In 2020, the Babylon Bee famously endorsed "Dave" for President, discovering only later that Dave was a role played by actor Kevin Kline in a movie that hit the box office in 1993. This year, we resolved to endorse an actual person, and that person is Kamala Harris.
Why Kamala? Take a look at this incredible list of just a few of her achievements:
- As a young San Francisco lawyer, broke into politics by using her stunning intellect to win the favor of 60-year-old Mayor Willie Brown
- Ran for President in 2020 and earned zero votes, proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was in it purely for the love of the game
- After Joe Biden announced he would select a woman of color as VP, she was a woman of color
- When Mike Pence was trying to turn America to fascism, bravely intervened by saying, "I'm speaking."
- Was such a popular Vice President that over 12 million people hiked thousands of miles from South America to come meet her
- She is brat, which we believe means that she is as cool as a bratwurst
- So beloved that she became the first person in history to win a primary without receiving a single vote
Wow. How can you put into words the greatness that is Kamala Harris, other than to say that you have to witness its significance over the passage of time? We are just simple folks here at the Bee -- but we know there is great significance to the passage of time.
We are grateful that when America is on the brink of losing its democracy and probably everyone becoming Nazis, the person standing strong against the forces of darkness is Kamala Harris. We at the Bee are proud to stand behind her. We will not be like the Washington Post, destined to be a byline in democracy's requiem, should the nation fall. No -- we stand with freedom, joy, and the ever-twerking figure of Megan Thee Stallion. We stand, and we proudly endorse, Kamala Harris.
Oh my god this is hilarious. I love these guys.
Heck, those millions came from all over the world! Somalians For Kammy even sent a slightly used machete!
Savage was right, liberalism is a mental disorder.
Now that the The Bee had endorsed Kamala I am voting for her. This is all I needed.
/just kidding
So beautifully listed the reasons why
It would be hilarious if Trump blacklisted Babylon Bee.
“I hate losing. Even fake endorsements. I’m ordering the entire BBQ staff to reeducation camp at CBS and sentencing them to unpaid endorsements at CNN.”
With this stunning courageous move, America’s newspaper of record proves that is even more stunningly courageous than it was, you know, before.
It would be.
The Bee should do an article on Trump’s reaction to their endorsement.
that is even > that it is even
Obviously.
The Bee is unburdened by what has been. Good for them!
Lordy how I love The Bee
We used to have mental hospitals filled with patients like him who were getting the treatment they needed. Now we just call them celebrities.
Daaannng! I love these guys. Using themselves to make a story fly. Ya gotta love the Bee. 😂
Funny
I think Trump has a real chance.
We shall see.
So wrong, so wrong. I still support Dave.
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