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DOJ Warns If Trump is Elected He Will Do To Them All The Stuff They're Doing To Him
Babylon Bee ^ | 09/13/2024 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 09/13/2024 2:39:15 PM PDT by DFG

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Officials from the Department of Justice issued a public warning that, if Donald Trump is elected, he will do to them all of the stuff they're currently doing to him.

According to Attorney General Merrick Garland, Trump's election could prove disastrous to the DOJ.

"It's important that we remember that if Trump manages to seize power again, he is going to treat the DOJ exactly as horribly as we are currently treating him," Garland said at a press briefing. "He will definitely start imprisoning political opponents, harassing them with frivolous lawsuits, and convicting them as felons through kangaroo courts just like we did to him. In legal terms, this is known as the 'I'm Rubber, You're Glue' principle, or the 'What's Good for the Goose Is Good for the Gander' precedent. We cannot give this dangerous threat to democracy a chance to strike back at those of us who are defending democracy by denying him his constitutional rights. He must be stopped."

While several experts publicly questioned whether or not Garland's warning betrayed the fact that the DOJ was biased against Trump, the experts quickly received visits from federal agents and have since ceased to express said opinions.

At publishing time, the FBI had joined the DOJ in warning that Trump would probably sign off on armed raids on his political opponent's residences in a fashion similar to the way he was raided by the FBI and DOJ.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; doj; garland; trump

1 posted on 09/13/2024 2:39:15 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

One can only hope!


2 posted on 09/13/2024 2:40:53 PM PDT by Fireone ("and dumb & silent we may be led, like sheep, to the Slaughter." G. Washington 1783)
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To: Fireone

GMTA.

That was my exact comment.


3 posted on 09/13/2024 2:44:58 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus”)
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To: metmom

Well Merrick, since you said the DOJ has not been politicized what do you have to worry about? If it is as fair and honest as you claim there is no reason to believe he will do anything different than you have done.


4 posted on 09/13/2024 2:48:15 PM PDT by DaiHuy (I support LGBTQ. (Lets Get Biden to Quit.))
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To: DFG
DOJ Warns If Trump is Elected He Will Do To Them All The Stuff They're Doing To Him

President Trump should show them how to do it really, really well.

5 posted on 09/13/2024 2:53:55 PM PDT by Navy Patriot (Celebrate Decivilization)
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To: DFG

Watch this pass it around....From a real Springfield resident. About 10 minute vid..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZADwzk5D2U


6 posted on 09/13/2024 2:55:08 PM PDT by dragnet2 (Diversion and evasion are tools of deceit)
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To: DFG

Once again the Bee comes up with a headline that looks real.


7 posted on 09/13/2024 2:58:38 PM PDT by redfreedom (May God save us from what the Democrats do in the name of good.)
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To: dragnet2

What is happening to our country is beyond tragic.

Only a move of God can fix it now.

If He doesn’t ensure Trump take office, we are toast.


8 posted on 09/13/2024 3:09:49 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus”)
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To: metmom

God saved Trump being killed. That’s a pretty big sign for me.


9 posted on 09/13/2024 3:20:00 PM PDT by roving (Deplorable Erectionists Listless Vessel )
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To: roving

I took it as such as well. And there are other things as well.

People have been praying for the hidden things to be revealed and people to wake up.

It indeed seems like both those things are happening.

And yet, I don’t want to read too much into it.

One of the things that I foresee needing to happen, is attrition amongst the democrats in power who are pulling the strings and actively trying to destroy this country. But whether that happens and how God chooses to do it is beyond my figuring out.


10 posted on 09/13/2024 3:24:01 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus”)
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To: DFG

Another Bee article destined to move from satire to reality!


11 posted on 09/13/2024 3:58:16 PM PDT by fremont_steve
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To: DFG

Hope so. Top assholes in DOJ, FBI and DHS all frog walked.


12 posted on 09/13/2024 4:07:03 PM PDT by hattend (Source Says Kamala Was Promoted At McDonald's After Having Affair With Mayor McCheese.)
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To: DFG

Think Garland will charge Trump with treason before the election.


13 posted on 09/13/2024 4:09:13 PM PDT by mware
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To: DFG

And what he doesn’t do to them, we’ll JaySix their asses the way they did all those American patriots.


14 posted on 09/13/2024 4:39:08 PM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (abc ! America's lower case far-left network.)
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To: DFG

Ironic the truth in that satirical header


15 posted on 09/13/2024 4:48:13 PM PDT by wardaddy (Thank you God for saving president Trump from murder)
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To: DFG

Bookmark


16 posted on 09/13/2024 5:50:01 PM PDT by aquila48 (Do not let them make you "care" ! Guilting you is how they control you. )
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To: mware
Think Garland will charge Trump with treason before the election.

As projection is the favored tactic of these America-hating swine I wouldn't be surprised. I regret Biden will probably get a natural death instead of a final stumble up gallows steps. The rest of them aren't that creaky so watching them do a rope-stretching last dance on television would go far to assuage that regret.

Parental warnings up front, of course. I want justice for these traitors, not savagery.

17 posted on 09/13/2024 10:14:31 PM PDT by MikelTackNailer (November forecast: Probable Trump victory despite cheating followed by intermittent liberal tears.)
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