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Harris/Walz Shine in CNN Interview [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 1 September 2024 | John Semmens

Posted on 08/31/2024 4:12:40 PM PDT by John Semmens

Predictions that Vice-President Kamala Harris' first interview since she was declared the Democrat nominee for president without winning a single vote in any Democrat primary were dashed by the scintillating performance of Kamala and her running mate Gov. Tim Walz (Minn) to moderator Dana Bash's probing questions.

Asked about her previous support for outlawing fracking, decriminalizing illegal border crossings, and no bail release of arraigned criminal suspects, Harris declared "as I have said on numerous occasions before, we must not let ourselves be burdened by what has been. My campaign is about bringing joy and unity to every person in America. Ideally, this can be achieved voluntarily, but I will not shy away from mandating it if that becomes necessary. As we have already seen in the polls, this message has propelled me into a lead over my opponent."

Bash followed up with a question about Trump calling Harris' price control plan "communism. How do you respond to that?" Kamala suggested "Tim has dealt with this issue when he was a high school teacher. He should take this one." Tim agreed. "yeah. I told my students that communism means everyone shares equally. That's why there was no poverty in the Soviet Union and voters always reelected members of the Communist Party by overwhelming 99% winning margins."

Satisfied with Walz's remarkably candid reply, Bash asked him "why did you say you carried weapons of war in combat when you were never deployed to a war zone?" He replied "have you ever been to Italy? The way they drive over there is crazy. I could've easily been killed just walking around on the street. It certainly seemed as dangerous as a war zone to me. But at least I didn't claim to have been awarded a Bronze Star for valor." Note: Gov. Wes Moore (D-Md) recently apologized for repeatedly and incorrectly saying that he was "awarded the Bronze Star" for his deployment to Afghanistan between August 2005 and March 2006.

In a bid to convince voters that she is a moderate, Harris told Bash she "would consider naming a Republican to serve in my cabinet. A couple who immediately spring to mind are former Reps. Liz Cheney (Wy) and Adam Kinzinger (Ill). Both served with distinction on the House select committee investigating the January 6, 2021, Capitol Hill insurrection."

Just this week Kinzinger was in the news complaining about House Republicans releasing a video of the January 6, 2021 riot at the Capitol in which then Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) admitted "we have totally failed. We have to take some responsibility for what happened. We have to make Trump pay a price for not getting the National Guard troops there to protect the Capitol." Kinzinger said "this unfairly makes the Speaker appear vindictive. We were all traumatized by that day's near-death experience when armed intruders broke into the building. We need to cut her some slack and be more forgiving."

Trump pointed out that "I did everything in my power to authorize the deployment of the National Guard to defend the Capitol, but the Speaker of the House is the person who has the last word on whether these troops are wanted. Pelosi never gave that last word. In fact, on the video made by her own daughter on that January 6 we can hear Nancy say 'I take full responsibility.' Her claim that I am to blame is a lie."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/367777-2024-08-31-semi-news-semi-satire-september-1-2024-edition.htm


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics; TV/Movies
KEYWORDS: communism; democrats; jan6; joyunity; postandrun; satire; selfpromotion; trump

1 posted on 08/31/2024 4:12:40 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

ROTFL! How much do they get for a shine and do they use Kiwi polish?


2 posted on 08/31/2024 4:43:23 PM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (Liberals are FOS. The greatest threat to "democracy" is "immigration". Stupid morons.)
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To: John Semmens

Shine? Really?

Oh, now I get it - shine, like a dumpster fire in a dark alley shines.


3 posted on 08/31/2024 7:36:22 PM PDT by Ancesthntr ("The right to buy weapons is the right to be free." - The Weapons Shops of Isher)
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To: FlingWingFlyer

Shine on a sneaker?


4 posted on 09/01/2024 12:32:55 AM PDT by Does so (Our Zoo-Animals are Safe--For Now...! πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦.....)
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To: Ancesthntr

Shines like a diamond in a goats ass.


5 posted on 09/01/2024 12:46:56 AM PDT by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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