Posted on 06/20/2024 9:37:16 AM PDT by John Semmens
Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen contends that "all the caterwauling folks are doing over the high cost of food is unwarranted. Over 40% of the population is obese. Being obese is unhealthy. If high prices cause these people to miss a few meals that is a good thing."
"Trump's libertarian idea that people ought to eat what they want will be the downfall of the nation," the Secretary opined. "I implore voters to look in the mirror and see how fat they've become by indulging themselves with all the fat and sugar laden food that the obese Donald Trump wants to make more affordable. I mean, compare the lean and fit Joe Biden with the corpulent Trump. Ask yourself, which is the better example for emulation? Then vote accordingly."
"Scientists say that switching from beef to insects as the main source of protein in our diets will improve both human health and the global climate," Yellen pointed out. "But we can't count on the shift being made voluntarily. After President Biden is reelected he will make the difficult decision on our behalf just he has for electric vehicles, and mandate the shift to insect protein by making it illegal to raise cattle, pigs, and chickens for food after 2030."
In related news, Yellen predicted that "forecasts that the national debt will become an impossible burden to bear are overlooking the solution the President has already pioneered by canceling students' college debt. If he can relieve the burden of repayment for millions of students by canceling their debt he can relieve the burden of repayment for all the taxpayers by canceling the government's $35 trillion debt. It would give the country a debt-free balance sheet and a fresh new start."
If you missed any of this week's other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...
https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,534284.0.html
Cat food is still somewhat reasonable. Tuna guts surprise meatloaf is yummy!
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