Posted on 08/30/2023 11:13:58 AM PDT by DFG
COLORADO SPRINGS, CO — A quiet community was thrown into chaos in the early hours of Wednesday morning, as a tactical team from the Federal Bureau of Investigation staged a pre-dawn raid at the home of 6th-grader Jaiden Rodriguez. Reports indicated the boy's backpack, which has a Gadsden flag patch, was seized in the raid.
"We have secured a highly dangerous item," said FBI spokesperson Chad Rookstool. "There was an anonymous tip from a concerned citizen in the area who reported a young man at this residence was in possession of a backpack that posed a threat to democracy itself. That threat has now been neutralized."
Controversy erupted on social media yesterday after it was learned Jaiden had been sent home from school for wearing his backpack, with faculty believing the Gadsden flag was a sign of Jaiden plotting a coup to overthrow the U.S. government. "Thank God it's been addressed by the authorities," said frightened schoolteacher Stephanie Dean. "That backpack was just out in public, threatening the lives of everyone who saw it. Democracy is once again safe."
School officials advised Jaiden to find a new, less-threatening backpack before returning to school. "He can choose from Pride patches, BLM patches, even a sickle and hammer patch," a member of the school's administrative staff explained. "However, a backpack displaying an important image from American history has no business at an American school."
At publishing time, Jaiden was reportedly prepared to return to class with his new, bright red "Make America Great Again" backpack.
Probably shot the kids dog first.
I’m glad that CNN was notified ahead of this raid so everyone could see what happens to those trying to overthrow the Biden regime.
It’s been a while, but this one caught me.
> It’s been a while, but this one caught me. <
Whenever I convince myself that I’m wise and sophisticated, I get stung by the Bee.
Dang. Caught me again.
-PJ
PURE EVIL!
I was pissed until I saw “Babylon Bee”. The scary thing is that it would not not surprise me.
I BOUGHT IT!
I knew this was the Bee because the FBI could not mobilize that quickly...
;-)
Dam, read the source first. Got me again.
The FBI would not shoot a little kid, unless he or she was a MAGA Republican of course.
I read that after the Pre-Dawn raid the Brave FBI Tactical Team reported that they sustained NO INJURIES. They seemed disappointed that the 12 YEAR OLD didn’t put up much of a fight.
MAGA backpack.
Excellent idea.
DAMMIT!
I was fully prepared for this one to be real.
I don’t believe this is true for one second. A real FBI pre-dawn raid would have shot the kid dead.
The Bee scores again! 😄😂
Sad how the democRATs have so weaponized the 3 letter agencies against Americans they disagree with that one wouldn't know if this was sarcasm without noting the source.
The stupid libtard teachers are dumber than the students
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