Posted on 12/28/2013 2:37:39 AM PST by servo1969
The emasculation of American men is a real problem, but as much as the liberal left would like to subvert the less fair, and more cave-mannish angels of our nature, nature finds a way.
That was, after all, the whole lesson of Jurassic Park, the movie, and I’m pretty sure the book as well, had I read the whole thing through instead of just watching the movie again.*
That’s why ridiculous lists like “11 ‘Girly’ Things Men Wish They Could Do Without Judgement” appear in liberal websites like the Huffington Post, I’m shocked and dismayed for three reasons. One, that women believe such tripe; two, that men act like there’s validity to such a list; and three, that women would actually want such things to be true.
There’s a few hints right off the bat that such a list is ludicrous and without any merit. Before you even read the d-mn article, I would like to direct your attention to the author – her name is Alanna Vagianos. Now, I’m sure I’ll be accused of gender stereotyping, but “Alanna” sure does sound like a woman’s name to me. So why is a woman writing a list about men's desires?
If she knew anything about men, she’d know a list of men’s desires hardly needs to number beyond 2 or 3 things. I’ll leave those up to your imagination.
Here’s another hint – the article is posted in “Huffpo Women.” Now, I dare you to look through my body of work and find any list I might have written about “women’s desires.” Most men don’t dare try to navigate the labyrinthine corridors of the M.C. Escher fourth-dimensional chess game that God, in His infinite wisdom, decided to make the female mind into. And if we tried, we’d probably be derided and mocked for it, and rightfully so. And yet for some reason, Alanna thinks she can plunge the shallow depths of the masculine soul and pull out eleven “girly” desires.
Of course she does. Her LinkedIn page shows she just graduated from college months ago with a degree in “Social Policy in Women’s Issues.” I can’t think of anyone more suited to understand the male psyche than a rabid feminist right out of college.
Well anyway, let’s get to the list.
It was composed from her “favorites” from a comment thread on the question, “Guys of Reddit, what girly thing do you really want to do or try but it is socially unacceptable?”
Now, she ignores the fact that many of the responses have to do with indiscriminate sex, or having drinks purchased for them, and goes for the most emasculating responses, of course.
1) Have more stylish clothing options
Since when has this been a major problem? I see men wear stylish stuff all the time, including dangerously extravagant colors and designs. Not my thing, but unless you’re really itching to wear a skirt and pearls, we have plenty of style options. I have a feeling this is an attempt to get us all in footie pajamas.
2) Be able to talk about other men being attractive
The closest I can come to understanding this is when thinking I’d like to emulate another man I find successful – this is different from attraction. And even then I don’t talk about it nor do I feel the need to talk to about it. And frankly, I’d feel weird if a friend brought it up. So, no thanks. We don’t need guys sitting around complimenting attractive men, beyond a high five after an awesome pass down the football field.
3) Order “girly” drinks
Again, what is the problem? I’ve ordered sweeter drinks and suffered the slings and arrows of mockery from other guys. Who cares? I’m not sure why men are afraid to order whatever they want.
4) Get treated to a spa day
This is so out of my sphere of desires, I don’t even know how to process it. If I want to relax, I watch football and drink too many beers. Men are made for utility and women for beauty – only one belongs at a spa. But Cory Booker is trying to change all that.
5) Carry a purse
I like to carry as little as possible at all times. I don’t need a bigger bag to hold stuff in. Now, despite Joe Rogan trying to bring back the fanny pack, I either carry nothing, or my business satchel. And that’s manly, d-mmit. And if it isn’t I’ll start carrying a bow and arrow quiver. And I won’t call it a quiver. Because that doesn’t sound masculine either.
6) Dance like no one’s watching
Again, alcohol makes all the difference. I’ve gone far along in life to embarrass myself on a dance floor at wedding receptions and had to hear about it from friends with memories less impaired than mine. Beyond that, I have no sober urge to twerk or to, “dance with my arms up, like in a girly way.” And I’m ok with that.
7) Wear makeup
Nope, not ever. The closest a man should come to make up is letting hot wing sauce linger on his face a little too long.
8) Get pampered by women
What the hell is this? “Chivalry and tradition teach young men they should buy meals and movie tickets, but many responded that they would like to be wined and dined once in awhile.” Apart from being cheap, no, it feels good and right to buy stuff for a woman. Someone actually said they want women to buy men flowers? What in God’s holy name would I want with flowers? Give them to my second girlfriend I hide from the first one who gave them to me? I’m confused.
9) Wear yoga pants
I have to think the guys who would dare suggest this are just hipsters who are tired of wearing tight skinny jeans because the cloth is too dense. Alanna quotes a guy saying they feel like kittens hugging your legs. I don’t think I’ve ever thought about how my legs felt ever in my life unless they were in intense pain. Who are these people?
10) Have fun with one’s children without being judged
Again, if you’re a real man you don’t care who judges you if you’re having fun with your kids. But there is a limit. Alanna cites a man who skips with his daughter while holding hands? This isn’t the Sound of Music, and you’re just conditioning your daughter to believe men should be unserious and silly, which sounds great when they’re young, but awful when she brings home a long-haired moon worshiping freak with a Ph.D in sixteen century Belgian lesbian studies whose only skill is playing the guitar. So stop the skipping.
11) Be able to show emotion without being labeled as gay or a “p*ssy.”
No. Men’s emotions are meant to be kept in and driven down into a deep dark hidden chamber in our steely souls until years of high blood pressure and stress drive us to an early death. A glorious death. A death deserving of real men. Also there are some emotions which are permissible to display – they are anger, ‘my football team made it to the play-offs’, and arousal. That’s it.
So that’s it. Resist the temptation, men. We are habituated by society to do what women tell us, but listen to your nature and instead do what you know is right. Be a man. Don’t help Alanna and Girly Huffpo try to redefine an equation for masculinity that has worked for at least five thousand years, and was designed by God to keep us happy and manly.
Otherwise you’ll end up like Pajama Boy.
*This is not true, I read it a few times and nearly every other Crichton novel as well. And I don’t care who knows it.
She’s pouting because she wants me to something for her and she knows if she gets me going I’m gonna open my wallet, toss the cash and credit card at her so she’ll but up.
Just horrible the guilt she can put me through.
She’s a Princess.
She has her own money but wants to spend mine.
I’m fine with that.
Whatever makes her happy...
Inner peace through materialism.
My brother and I (we look nothing alike) took my kids to the playground when they were small. As we sat on the bench talking, I noticed two women staring at us. My brother quickly commented “They think we are a gay couple with kids”.
So I got that over with.
“I keep that place clean ever night and I am forever dusting it...”
I hear you. Before I married my husband, I dusted my kitchen faithfully every week. When I sold the place, the realtor asked if the stove had ever been used. Heck yes, I used to light my cigarettes from the burners.
That’s how I discovered I look good in short bangs.
LOL!!!
Reminds me of a time I got snowbound in Tulsa. The roads were unusable due to the amount of ice and the electric was gone-old.
So I need some heat. I grabbed a pack of cigarettes and a lighter .
Lit my cigarette, turned the gas on heater in the bathroom and as I was stooping down to light the thing with the lighter all of a sudden I saw bright light, felt incredible heat on my face and the sound of fire, Which was “WHOOSH !!!!”.
My face was still beat red when the cute neighbor gal dropped. Y and my hair was unmistakabley full of slip ends.
She laughed and invited herse I saw bright and made me drink some Sketch and quite a bit of wine before taking advantage of me.
I crafted a long stick out of a wire hanger and it enabled me to post a bit of wood to the end which I would light.
From then on I only lit the furnace while standing just on the other side of the wall which protected me from playing Kurt Russell ala the movie “Backdraft”.
If women are older than me, they appreciate the door being opened for them, and I do. If they’re my age or younger, they don’t and I don’t.
When you treat an entire gender as either threats or tools, be prepared for more personal space than you bargained for.
As Merle Haggard sang...
I’m rough and I’m rowdy,
I’m tough and I’m smart,
But I’ve got a tender heart.
I think having a tender heart is the foundation of being a true Man. Show me a dog doing something brave and I will cry. Show me a person doing something brave and I will cry. But I will not shirk the throat-cutting either. I will not freeze in fear. I will remember my ancestors and my family and will gladly lay my life down.
All the rad-fem ideas about being able to raise boys to like girl things and vice versa have been thoroughly debunked. Just like the idea of the tabula rasa or blank slate. All rational people know this...it's just that radical feminists, being among the most irrational people in the world, haven't caught on yet.
One time long ago one of my ex girl friends told me to tell her about my feelings. I told her I was feeling pretty hungry at the moment, and could she make me a sandwich. Our relationship didn’t last long.
I'd say the death of your dog counts as one of those times.
Good God. I’m going to show this list to my husband....he always enjoys a good laugh.
I agree with you whole heartedly on that note and add the loss of a close horse to that. I cried the hardest on the loss of my wife but the dog and horse really came close as they consoled me during the loss of my wife.
Sounds like on of my experiences.
So I’m watching the Super Bowl some years back.
Yeah, I was just laying around, drinking beer and waiting for the 1/2 time entertainment.
My girlfriend walks in, smoking hot and all smiles “Hey, babe. What’s on the TV?” She inquired.
“Dust...” I responded
And that how it started....
I'd say the death of your dog counts as one of those times.
Agreed. My dog died earlier this year, and it was the first time I cried since my father died, 17 years earlier.
In fact, I would say three of the points raised in this otherwise silly article are valid:
Have more stylish clothing options.
Men's clothes were more stylish (especially back in the 40s and '50s) when they were not being created entirely by gay fashion designers.
Have fun with one’s children without being judged.
Real men do this all the time. But while having fun, you also need to teach them to be strong and confident.
Be able to show emotion without being labeled as gay or a “p*ssy.”
On rare occasions, only, as noted above. Saluting a display of the American flag at a funeral for a hero is perhaps another one.
See the grammar post above...
FMCDH(BITS)
I count dogs as part of family..... ;)
I pamper my guy all the time. From little things like bringing him a cold drink while he is shingling the house, back rubs afterwards, taking him to the movie of his choice to other things that are none of your business.
If I can't do things for him then I am just a lump. I don't like being a lump.
What an opportunity! Let’s create another list:
“11 Manly Things Men Wish They Could Do Without Judgement”.
(I’ll start)
1) Tell liberals to “STFU, you stupid communist!”
2) Tell criminals that, “If you break the law we are going to string you up!”
3) Tell Muslims to behave themselves like civilized people, or that they will be deported back to the nasty primitive dictatorships from which they emerged.
A gf was giving me the “silent treatment” and as I’m leaving to work night shift I notice we’re out of milk. When she feels fat, she drinks 2%, otherwise she wants whole milk, and whichever I bring home is going to be the wrong one. So I ask her what kind of milk she wants me to bring home. She answered “I don’t give a %$#& what milk you get.”
So I brought home goat milk. I really wanted camel, but no dice.
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