Posted on 08/22/2013 9:55:50 AM PDT by 1rudeboy
A groundbreaking new study has shown that climate change is the underlying cause of increasingly frequent and severe climate model failures. Researchers at Pennsylvania State Community College have discovered a critical link between atmospheric greenhouse gas concentration and general circulation model errors.
“Climate change has made it increasingly difficult to predict climate change,” says Dr. Manyard Michael, the lead scientist behind the study. “The current 16 year pause in global warming illustrates just how serious this situation has been; if not for climate change, we now know that we would have been able to accurately predict the current break in warming and clearly show that climate change is actually accelerating faster than forecast – not stopping as climate change is making it appear to those outside of the climate science community.” Dr. Michael also noted that they stumbled on this important finding almost by accident. “We just happened to notice that the higher carbon dioxide concentrations climbed, the more we had to adjust the data to get the results we knew to be right, and the more we adjusted the data, the bigger the error in the models. It’s a very strong positive feedback.”
This research has been quietly in the works for several years, and was almost compromised by the 2009 research theft known as “climategate.” For example, one particular email that has been cited repeatedly said in part, “The fact is that we can’t account for the lack of warming at the moment and it is a travesty that we can’t.” Skeptics have misrepresented this quote to suggest that climate scientists can’t explain why the climate is not behaving as forecast and thus there is no climate change happening when in actuality, the researcher was lamenting exactly the opposite. He knew the fact that climate models did not predict a lack of warming meant climate change had progressed much faster than previously thought, and he was expressing sadness that man has brought the climate to this point.
Climate change deniers and anti-science websites have long grasped at the seemingly endless string of model failures and ever increasing forecast error as a way to argue the theory that humans are causing global warming is somehow falsified. Noted climate modeler Dr. Hans Jameson of the National Model Rocket Association commented, “thanks to this research, we can say with certainty what we in the climate research community known all along, that the bigger the climate model errors, the more confident we can be that manmade climate change is happening.” Because climate change continues to accelerate faster than at any time since before the dinosaurs, the scientific consensus is that that there will be some truly stunning model failures on the horizon.
The researchers also stressed that mainstream climate science has demonstrated a remarkable ability to hindcast. As Dr. Michael points out “we can now predict the lull in warming of the past 16 years with surprising accuracy.” He further remarked that “given how well we can predict the past, the only thing that explains the difficulty of forecasting the future with equal success is the increasing concentration of greenhouse gasses. This research changes everything.” And while they are yet unable to fully explain the exact mechanics behind the correlation, the researchers expressed 99% confidence in their conclusion.
The study which is set to be published in every scientific journal is expected to open up new areas of unprecedented spending in the emerging field of climate research research.
Be careful; not everyone here can spot satire, despite Stemmons’ best efforts.
ROFLMBO, but you might need to label that satire.
Yeah, I might have to ask a mod to add it to the title.
Is that satire? I honestly can’t tell.
Started laughing when I read the title. It sounds like something AGW advocates would actually believe - a convoluted pretzel-like explanation that makes them comfortable in the face or reality.
Somebody had way too much fun writing that sentence. BTT
ROFL. That's pretty funny stuff. I like the last subtle jab. "...the emerging field of climate research research."
Good satire but there is no such story at the link.
It’s buried in the comments. I tried to link to it, but couldn’t
I spotted it as satire right off since no climate scientist would ever admit that his models were unreliable.
After all, they constantly adjust the models so they give the results they are looking for.
Great satire, although, I have to worry about the mental health of anyone who can successfully get this deep into the minds of the insane.
Climate change sophistry now seems to be on par with evolution sophistry.
Algore seen here celebrating just after reading the most recent IPCC report. He immediately went from here to the 5,000 square foot money counting house and vault addition to his $20 million California mansion.
Look, it doesn’t matter whether global warming, I’m sorry, climate change, is happening or not.
The reason being is that there is NOTHING we can do about it anyway. The shear size of the earth with all its complex mega-systems, means that puny man can not affect them in any global way. It’s impossible. Why try? Why change your lifestyle, making life miserable, for no meaningful global impact?
There was a thread here few days ago about how the clean air laws of the 70s have been the cause of global warming because the sunlight now hits the ground instead of being reflected by all the pollution.
“Is that satire? I honestly can’t tell.”
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Of course you can’t tell because it is actually not possible to write satire about something as absurd as the global warming religion. Satire depends upon exaggeration and you cannot exaggerate infinite stupidity.
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