Think of it from the perspective of evolutionary psychology. A "nice" man might not be sufficiently aggressive to protect his mate and children. Women do not respect a man who is too "nice", who they can walk all over. If he will not stand up to her, then he might not stand up to the world.
Also, women hate being bored. The bad guy may scare her, he may upset her, but he will not bore her.
Sadly, as a non-aggressive "nice guy", I agree with you. Many times I've been told I was "too nice". It wasn't until I was in my 50s that I understood "too nice" really meant "not bad enough".