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ARE WOMEN REALLY WITCHES?
Yahoo Message Boards | 17 May 2003 | Vanity

Posted on 05/17/2003 4:52:39 AM PDT by MeneMeneTekelUpharsin

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur's youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; but if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed. The question was: What do women really want?

Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and, to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. Since it was better than death, however, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end. He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everybody: the princess, the prostitutes, the priests, the wise men, and the court jester. In all, he spoke with everyone but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. What most people did tell him was to consult the old witch, as only she would know the answer. The price would be high, since the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exhorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no alternative but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer his question, but he'd have to accept her price first: the old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified: she was hunchbacked and awfully hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage water, often made obscene noises. He had never run across such a repugnant creature. He refused to force his friend to marry her and have to endure such a burden. Gawain, upon learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He told him that nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table. He relented, their wedding was proclaimed, and the witch answered Arthur's question: What a woman really wants is to be able to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it went. The neighboring monarch spared Arthur's life and granted him total freedom. What a wedding Gawain and the witch had! Arthur was torn between relief and anguish. Gawain was proper as always, gentle and courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display. She ate with her hands, belched and farted, and made everyone uncomfortable. The wedding night approached. Gawain, steeling himself for a horrific night, entered the bedroom. What a sight awaited! The most beautiful woman he'd ever seen lay before him! Gawain was astounded and asked what had happened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she'd been a witch, half the time she would be her horrible, deformed self, and the other half, she would be her beautiful maiden self. Which would he want her to be during the day and which during the night?

What a cruel question!

Gawain began to think of his predicament: during the day a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his home, an old spooky witch? Or would he prefer having by day a hideous witch, but by night a beautiful woman to enjoy many memorable and personally satisfying evenings. Gawain, after much thought, finally replied, "be whatever you wish to be my dear". Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time, because he had respected her and had let her be in charge of her own life.

What is the moral of this story?

The moral is that it doesn't matter if your woman is pretty or ugly, smart or dumb. Underneath it all, she's still a witch. And if you try to control her life, things will get ugly.


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: kingarthur; want; whatwomen
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To: stanz
Somebody responded to your tag line and you asked "Do people on FR really respond to tag lines?"

Literally, you questioned reality.

21 posted on 05/17/2003 8:44:32 AM PDT by Tribune7
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To: buffyt
I am sincerely sorry for what you went through. My father was a tyrant too but he only beat me once.

I am an adult male but frankly am the nurturing one in our household with two children. My wife is indeed a witch, a controlling, manipulative, mean, lazy, and emotionally abusive person. My counselor speculates that I married "my father" to heal childhood wounds.

Just great, I reply.
22 posted on 05/17/2003 8:45:41 AM PDT by mwl1
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To: Tribune7
I'm convinced that if Hillary had married a guy that was half-way decent she would be quasi-likeable

What decent guy would have wanted to marry Hillary?
23 posted on 05/17/2003 8:49:15 AM PDT by redheadtoo
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To: redheadtoo
I used the phrase "half-way decent guy" :-)

Anyway, my view is that before she met Slick she might have been salvagable. She was a Goldwater girl once.

Of course, I could be wrong.

24 posted on 05/17/2003 8:58:01 AM PDT by Tribune7
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To: stanz
Here's a site that will warm the cockles of your heart:

www.4atheists.com/contact-4-atheists.html

25 posted on 05/17/2003 2:00:18 PM PDT by LuisBasco
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
It's a fair cop.


26 posted on 05/17/2003 2:04:37 PM PDT by Liberal Classic (Quemadmoeum gladis nemeinum occidit, occidentis telum est.)
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
She turned me into a newt!
27 posted on 05/17/2003 2:08:35 PM PDT by Poohbah (Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women!)
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
ARE WOMEN REALLY WITCHES?

I don't know about women in general but my first ex-mother-in-law certainly was/is, really.

28 posted on 05/17/2003 2:41:57 PM PDT by varon
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
Post to save!
29 posted on 05/17/2003 2:47:26 PM PDT by jwh_Denver (Please donate to my favorite charity at jwh_Denver.com.)
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To: LuisBasco
What makes you think I need to be encouraged to look at any website simply because you and another Freeper had a comment about my tag line?

Last time I looked, I lived in a democratic society and belonged to a website which had an open forum for discussion of various topics.

I don't pass comments on anybody's taglines. I replied to a post entitled "Are Women Really Witches". If you care to discuss that, I'll be happy to post. Otherwise I'm not interested.

30 posted on 05/17/2003 5:15:20 PM PDT by stanz (All those folks who don't believe in evolution should go jump off the flat edge of the Earth)
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
ARE WOMEN REALLY WITCHES?

When I'm getting lots of dates, no. When I'm in a slump, yes.

31 posted on 05/17/2003 5:17:24 PM PDT by Mr. Mojo
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
The more that I think about this story, the less that I like it. Perfectly adorable when they get what they want and totally ungracious when they don't is a perfect description of most 5-year-olds. I realize that many men and women never seem to mature beyond that level, but I don't think most women are stuck at the emotional maturity of a 5-year-old. Furthermore, I don't like the implication that when a grown woman does act that way that she is only following her nature. Society can't survive if adults constantly behave as if they were children.

WFTR
Bill

32 posted on 05/17/2003 8:44:07 PM PDT by WFTR (Liberty isn't for cowards)
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To: IronJack
ROFL!!!
33 posted on 05/18/2003 6:33:37 AM PDT by MeneMeneTekelUpharsin (El que rie ultimo, rie mejor.)
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; but if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed.

I thought King Arthur was supposed to be wise. Why didn't he take this year to build up his army and defeat the neighboring kingdom?

34 posted on 05/18/2003 6:54:06 AM PDT by thesharkboy
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