Anti-French Internet site "FranceStinks.com" scores hit with US public

Anti-French sentiment has found an outlet in America: A new Web site where members of the public can send jokes and express their general displeasure at Paris' stance opposing the US bid to launch war on Iraq. "FranceStinks.com" was set up by a 50-year-old Burbank, California-based television producer with a string of businesses to his name who refuses to reveal his identity, going instead by the pen name "Yankee Doodle" so as not to get too many rude letters, he says.

"Americans, myself included, have always had a very fond place in our hearts, and in our style and in our cuisine and in everything for France, and when you feel closer to someone ... are more hurt when you feel betrayed," the Webmaster says.

To express his feelings and give a forum to like-minded people, he spent four days two weeks ago setting up the site - marked by a traffic sign with an image of the Eiffel Tower on it and a 'prohibited' line scratched through it.

"When it comes to knowing who their friends and allies are, the simple truth is that France Stinks! ... The French are happy to sell us everything from runny cheese to over-priced old grapejuice, but when it comes to reciprocal respect ..."

The site includes 16 pages of jokes and anti-French cartoons of the ilk: "What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII? A table for 100,000 m'sieur?"

And, "How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris? Nobody knows, they never tried."

Photo-montages include one that reads: "White flags: new technology that could save your life."

A list of 162 brands and French businesses to boycott is given, with requests for Web surfers to complete it.

Similar to the famous tea party thrown at the port of Boston on December 16, 1773 when patriots threw boxes of tea belonging to the British Crown into the harbour to protest unfair taxation, Yankee Doodle calls for US patriots to throw all French products in their homes down the toilet.

"Purify your homes and destroy their products then replace them ONLY with all-American goods or those of our real allies in the world," the site urges. "Drink English beer! Drink Italian wine! Eat Polish sausages!"

He also proposes an online shop to buy all kinds of clothing and items including teddy bears that carry anti-France slogans.

The Webmaster also has a similar site targeting the Germans, in unison with France both at the UN Security Council and in a recent NATO meeting aimed to slow action against Iraq as proposed by the United States.

"GermanyStinks.com" may have received around 300,000 hits, but its French counterpart has had five to six times more, "Yankee Doodle" says.

"It's because Americans have never really felt close to Germany. With both world wars, yeah, those guys don't like us, that's what we expect. But not France. So my website is a place to express that in a kind of a community."

And he says that in thousands of sarcastic or insulting messages received from French Internet surfers, the vast majority of visitors use the term "cowboy" as an insult.

"Yes, we are cowboys, and proud of it," "Yankee" counters. "The cowboys are brave, honest, it's not an insult. A cowboys doesn't look for a fight, but will never run away from it."

His message to the French: "If those airplanes had flown into the Louvre or the Quai d'Orsay, you would feel differently."

Among comments and jibes is offered a list - following the successful renaming by a restaurant of the term "French Fries" to "Freedom Fries" - of alternative names for the French kiss, proffered by patriots.

Among them: "Liberty Lick," "Freedom Frisk," "Patriot Act," "Swirlique," "Star Spangled Kiss," "Red, White, and Bliss Kiss," "Tongue of Surrender," and "The First Of Many Inspections."

Speaking which:

Why Kirk Is Better Than Picard
Kirk is a leader, not a follower.
Kirk never really got into that kinky "Jumpsuit" look.
Kirk had an affair more than once a season.
One Word: Hair.
Another Word: Pretty-good-looking-can't-see-the-weave-WIG.
Kirk can beat up a Klingon bare-handed.
Picard is a French man with an English accent.
Kirk would date Beverly Crusher -- and not worry about the consequences!!
Kirk never drinks tea. Ever.
Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smirk.
Kirk would personally throw Wesley off his bridge.
Two words: Shoulder Roll.
Kirk doesn't wear dresses when admirals arrive for lunch.
Kirk once said: "I've got a belly-ache -- and it's a beauty."
Kirk would never sing to children in a crisis.
Kirk can almost drive a stick shift.
Kirk, almost single-handedly, re-populated the Earth's whale population.
Kirk says "Prime Directive? What Prime Directive?"
Kirk knows 20th Century curses.
Kirk was NEVER infiltrated by the Borg and used against the Federation.
Kirk ate little coloured cubes and still remained relatively healthy.
Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology.
Kirk never pretends to be a barber in order to gain a tactical advantage.
Kirk wasn't shy about taking his shirt off-even around those pesky Yeomans.
Kirk would never waste a holodeck on something stupid like Dixon Hill.
Kirk never once stood up and had to straighten his shirt.
One Word: Velour.
Kirk can beat a Vulcan at Chess.
When Kirk was Picard's age, he retired from Admiral and took to climbing rocks.
When Picard was 37, he was only Captain of the lowly freighter, Stargazer. When Kirk was 37, he was Captain of the flagship Enterprise.
Kirk liked a good belt of liquor every now and again.
One Word: Iman.
Kirk looks good with a ripped shirt.
If Kirk ever met a Ferengi, he would rip off its head.
Kirk says "Shoot first and wait for retaliation."
Kirk's first officer NEVER tells him to stay on the bridge.
Kirk never leaves the room to bawl somebody out.
Kirk doesn't rely on the wisdom of some dumb old janitor to get him out of intergalactic scrapes.
Two Words: Funky Sideburns.
Kirk never asks his bartender for advice.
Kirk never once said "Abandon ship! All hands abandon ship!"
Kirk is not politically correct.
Kirk never got "dumped" by a woman for an intergalactic busy body named after a letter of the alphabet.
Kirk never wore green tights and frolicked about in Sherwood Forest.
If there was ever a Klingon on Kirk's bridge, Kirk would likely be dead.
Ever hear of a bar shooter called "Make it so?" No? How about a "Beam me up Scotty" then? See the difference?
One Word: Miniskirts.

"The current German and French policy on Iraq is obstructionist; it doesn't offer a realistic alternative to the policy of the Bush administration. Because this obstructionism seems irrational I have sought a psychological explanation for the French and German posture.

If you have a more cogent rationale that better explains the French and German position I would love to hear it."

Seems that silence is your only answer ggekko, well done. Interesting reading between you two, but I noticed that Burkeman1 realized he was in far over his head after a couple responses when it resorted to name calling with the Neocon rip and describing your summaries as hit pieces. Nothing could be further from the truth and I suspect even he understood that his drive by snipes didn't relate to you.

I optimistically look at this anti French backlash as a wonderful thing, in that its a wakeup call for the right in America. The French have been trying to undercut us at least since the fall of Communism, and I felt like a lone voice in the wilderness about their blatent Anti capitalist, anti American stances until this flared up. Its in America's national interest not to go to any wars with France. (Not that it would matter)I doubt it even serves any good to boycott them. The summation of this latest episode shouldn't be that America is filled with hatred for the Frenchman.

Its that America should simply not trust the opinions of the Frenchman.

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