Posted on 01/03/2003 11:19:21 AM PST by mhking
Are You A Democrat? Take This Test To Find Out!
Wednesday, January 01, 2003
Virtually anyone can be a Democrat; just simply quit thinking and vote that way; but, if you want to be a GOOD Democrat, there are some necessary prerequisites. Compare the list below and see how you rate:
1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
2. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
3. You have to believe that guns, in the hands of law-abiding Americans, are more of a threat than U. S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of the Chinese communists.
4. You have to believe that there was no "Art" before Federal funding.
5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.
6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial; but, being homosexual is natural.
7. You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.
8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists from our cities do.
10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.
11. You have to believe the military, not corrupt politicians start wars.
12. You have to believe the NRA is bad, because it supports certain
parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.
15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.
16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is really a lady.
17. You have to believe that the only reason Socialism hasn't worked anywhere its been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.
18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and sex offender belongs in the White House.
19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites and bestiality should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
20. You have to believe that illegal Democrat Party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of the United States.
P. S. There really isn't anything very "democratic" about the Democrat Party. Think about that!
You think Jimmy Carter can solve any foriegn crisis
You belive if we unilaterally disarm, Communist countries and terrorist will follow our lead.
You think any African American who isn't a Democrat or is Sucessful is an Uncle Tom.
You believe if it weren't for Rush, Sean or Fox News the Democrats would have won the last elections
You think every August 6th & 9th we should apologize for dropping the Atomic bomb on those poor innocent Japanesse.
You think Paul Wellstone's funneral was appropiate especially considering it was Bush & the CIA who had him killed.
You are hoping that the economy gets worse and the war with Iraq goes bad, Another words you are hoping Americans suffer and some die just so Bush looks bad.
Score: 35, Bob Dole
Hows the Viagra working?
I should add that willingness to use the f word must be a prerequisite for posting there. Evidently most of DU's patrons feel that it is the height of wit and creativity to interject the f word and certain scatological words into their comments. As in "oh my effing god, did you hear what s--- those effing FReepers just said on one of their posts?" A typical comment from their site.
Yep, sure is.
Now that gets me hot.
;>)
Eaker
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