Man inserts firecracker in his penis to protest war

Talk radio | October 10, 2002 | RJayneJ

[RJayneJ]

My husband heard on Bill Cunningham talk radio in Cincinnati that a war protestor inserted a firecracker in his penis and threatened to light it.

Has anyone heard of this bazaar incident? I have to find this unusual story for my Bulldog Bulletin.

[Jambe]

I'm requesting permission to send this thread off to Jay Leno or Dave Lettermen for use as part of their monologue - any royalty funds go to FreeRepublic.

This has got to be some of the best one-liners on the net!!

[GWfan]

That would be the dorsal penis vein. ;)

[doug from upland]

Oh, let it be William Rivers Pitt. (but the word I hear from Boston is it would have to be a mini-firecracker) :)

[Ditter]

Fire away, dumb butt, I sure don't care.

[Spunky]

Men will do anything to draw attention. Case in point. ;-)

An elderly couple, Sam and Bessie, are "snowbirds" in Austin, Texas. Sam always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly. He walks into the house and says to his wife, "Notice anything different about me?"

Bessie looks him over, "Nope."

Frustrated Sam storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything DIFFERENT NOW?"

Bessie looks up and says, "Sam, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow!!"

Furious, Sam yells, 'AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, BESSIE? IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!.."

To which Bessie replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, Sam.-----ya shoulda bought a hat."

[md2576]

I found a similar story!

After having their 11th child, a very thick couple decided that that was enough and they could not afford a larger house. So, the husband went to his doctor, and told him that he and his wife didn't want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem. The doctor instructed him to go home, get a fire cracker, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10. The man said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest man, but I don't see how putting a firecracker in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me." So, the couple drove to get a second opinion. The second doctor was just about to tell them about the medical procedure for a vasectomy when he realized how truly backwards these people were. This doctor instead told the man to go home and get a firecracker , light it, place it in a beer can, hold it to his ear and count to 10. Figuring that both learned physicians couldn't be wrong, the man went home, lit a firecracker and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5 . . . . ", at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and resumed counting on his other hand.

[Doc On The Bay]

This has got to be some of the best 'One-Liners' on the Net!

Of Course; It's FR!

Doc

[BJungNan]

That's one BANG of a protest.

[LRS]

Sounds like a phallacy...

[Ranger]

Isn't that an Arkansas vasectomy?

[Robert Lomax]

Bump to find out if he blew it off. (No pun intended)

[Doc On The Bay]

LOL!

Doc

[oyez]

The don't have those draft card to burn any more so they have to light something.

[xzins]

Sorry....but I just gotta bump to this. LOL.

[Calvin Locke]

I was watching the History Channel last weekend. Blasting Mt. Rushmore. Lightning 3mi away set off a charge prematurely.

The guy in the bosun's chair above the charge lost his boots, but was back at work the next day.

[DeFault User]

Well nobody has said it yet, so here goes. If he really lights it, it's going to be a job for ....

Dick Tracy

[mhking]

"Hold muh beer 'n watch this!" PING....

If you want on or off this list, please let me know!
This has come about after much badgering by you, my friends and extended family...

FR is our public radio/tv. Support FR! The Fall Telethon is underway!

[Destro]

Bring back Opie and Anthony!! Radio sucks without them.

[fso301]

Go tell him I don't believe he's serious.

[willy WOXOF]

was this guy on Leno?