A History of French "Warfare" (Surrender)

Conquer France! ^ | NA | Conquer France!

[3k9pm]

Attribute it to the blind squirrel and the nut theory.

Even a blind squirrel will find a nut occasionally.

[jwh_Denver]

"France: An American Tourist’s Guide"

LMAO! Thanks!

[Cato the Censor]

Your history is flawed---Here's just a few examples from 49 B.C. and about 750 A.D. or so:
Ariovistus, the valiant Gallic leader ,made Julius Caesar look like Sid Caesar for four years. Charlemagne, king of the Franks, met and defeated the Muslim Saracen hordes on Spanish soil and saved all of Europe for Christianity.

[CT]

Charlemagne, king of the Franks, met and defeated the Muslim Saracen hordes on Spanish soil and saved all of Europe for Christianity.

And Karl Der Grosse is regarded with great reverence as a German. Later, the kingdom split into two.

I think it also worth noting that one of the reasons Germany fought France in WWI was over lands held by France that were occupied by German-speaking peoples. Specifically the Loire Region, west of the Rhine. Thus, one might argue that the Frankish Kingdom was more a part of Germany, even in what is now France, than it ever was France.

Honestly, as an American of German ancestry, I have long wondered what gene pool mixed into the French character that made the French such wooses.

Maybe it was the snails they ate.

[ErnBatavia]

"Tourist Guy" knew the drill....

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

Is that monkey actually eating CHEESE!?!?!

Either that or a Ritz cracker...that used to have cheese on it.

[CT]

King Charlemagne The greatest of medieval kings was born in 742, at a place unknown. He was of German blood and speech, and shared some characteristics of his people- strength of body, courage of spirit, pride of race, and a crude simplicity many centuries apart from the urbane polish of the modern French.

Taken from Charlemagne the King:

An biography from Will Durant's

STORY OF CIVILIZATION

1950

[PoorMuttly]

German then...evidently chicken now. Have they been bought? Are they afraid of bleeding on the Moslems they let in to the place...which they deserve, considering their behavior during the last millenium? Different generation, I know...but who the hell are these people NOW? I am so disappointed in them. Maybe they will sober up...when they actually DO some bleeding...as we have. We need them...where are they. Would they prefer that we should have fed them to their Russian buddies? The Russians seem to be better friends to us than they are these days. BTW, I don't believe any of this posturing the Russians are doing now. They want money from those desert rats...to fix some of the damage they did to themselves in trying to control said vermin...but we got in their way. Oops! Uncool to preserve the ungrateful...so they can turn around and kill you. If the Germans aren't FOR us...who ARE they? Oh right. Euros. How French.

[PoorMuttly]

Just one more proof that PATTON WAS RIGHT !

[x]

Pretty scandalous. He left pretty much left out the wars of Louis XIV, when France dominated Europe. And from a purely amoral point of view, Napoleon's feat was remarkable.

What doomed France? A theory occurs to me. Conscription in the 19th century was accompanied with spreading use of condoms. Birth control suited the French character, which was pleasure loving and tightfisted about money and inheritances, but it cost France the numbers and dynamism at a time when Germany was on the rise. Swelling numbers made other countries strive and hustle while the French were enjoying themselves (comparatively speaking) and living off the fruits of their earlier labors.

[weikel]

Charlemagne was undoubtably a great man despite the atrocities against the Saxons but it was Charles Martel who at the Battle of Tours saved Europe from the Muslims.

[weikel]

Im beginning to think he joined the rebellion because his career in the British Army wasn't going anywhere after that LOL.

[wardaddy]

I like almost everything about France except the French. The best wine, food, nice chateaus, beautiful topography, their women speak English in a cute way and they often have a waifish charm.

I would not however discount totally Napolean and certainly not Charlemagne.

JMHO.....I like Jean Reno too but I think he was born in Spain.

[Tribune7]

I think you can say the Vietnamese lost to the Cambodians.

[Tribune7]

I think you'll like this one.

[frodolives]

Hey! You guys are really educational! Thanks for the tidbits of history with my lurking.

[weikel]

Napolean might have done some good in victory but since he was defeated his legacy despite the abolition of serfdom in the areas occupied by his armies must be viewed negatively. Charlemagne probably saved Europe from sinking into barbarism for another 1000 years he nearly resurrected the Roman Empire in the West however given the customary succession laws among the Franks upon his death his realm plunged almost immediately into civil war( and the Franks before the Merovingians were overthrown by Pepin were one of the most barbaric of the barbarian tribes most of the other tryed to preserve some vestige of civilization not the Franks until Pepin anyway). The only successful modification Charlemagne was able to impose was the Salic law. To top that off a wave of Viking invasions followed and the church decided there was more power in supressing and hoarding knowledge then spreading it.

[CARepubGal]

Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey Bump!

[weikel]

LOL when Pol Pot probably the most malovent and evil leader in history bar none though thankfully a weak one attacked Vietnam I think it took the NVA about 3 days to overrun the country. Hell if Heaven exist Pol Pot was so evil to make the North Vietnamese look like angels by comparison they might have made up for all the bad things they did just by deposing that bastard.

[wardaddy]

Charlemagne is viewed historically as successful and his impact was lasting.....even if compromised.

Many historians view Napolean as an astute tactician with a suprising bent towards enlightened government. The fact that he was a determined hegemony enthusiast doomed him to defeat but that doesn't dimish him to the dustbin in my view.

Regards!