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The 'right thing' tears at a family
Seattle Post-Intelligencer ^ | July 8, 2002 | Chris McGann

Posted on 07/09/2002 12:48:48 AM PDT by Alan Chapman

Trever Palmer, 17, says he felt nervous and slightly heroic the night he picked up the phone, dialed 911 and informed the King County Sheriff's Office that his father was growing marijuana.

Minutes later, when Aaron Palmer, a Covington computer programmer, returned home from an evening of swimming laps at the local pool, deputies arrested him. They later found more than a dozen marijuana plants growing in a hidden room in the garage and booked the single father of three into the King County Jail on drug charges.

Two months later, as Trever Palmer prepares for his last year of high school, the 140-pound wrestler is still grappling with the consequences of his actions and talked about them in an interview yesterday.

Although police lauded him for doing the right thing, he says half his relatives are mad at him. He's "found out who my friends really are" while trying to avoid Kentwood High School classmates who scorned him, calling him "a weasel" and names much worse than that.

Palmer made the 911 call largely because of a lesson he learned in a Junior ROTC ethics course: "Stand up for what you believe in, don't follow the crowd and be your own person."

He still thinks he did the right thing.

"I felt like I was saving my sister and brother from this guy," he said. "You can only put up with so much."

But his family is torn apart, and his 15-year-old sister may not see the 911 call as such a brave act.

The night her father was taken away, "she really didn't speak much to me," Palmer said. "She was crying and trying to get her stuff together."

Today, she "just kind of avoids me," he said.

Palmer said his 7-year-old brother didn't know what was going on.

Palmer, who is spending part of the summer with his grandparents in Pennsylvania, plans to live with his best friend's family until he graduates and joins the Air Force. His sister and brother are staying with a cousin. Their mother, who is divorced from their father, is unemployed and "doesn't have room for them in her apartment," Palmer said.

Palmer's sister could not be reached last night, and Palmer's father did not return phone calls. Aaron Palmer, 38, was released on $5,000 bail shortly after his arrest and pleaded not guilty last week to a felony charge of drug manufacturing, the South County Journal reported. He faces up to five years in prison.

The boy said many of his relatives can't comprehend his motives for calling police.

"It sucks," Palmer said last night. "I was really hoping that they would understand. It's kind of like that hole in (me) that needs to be filled."

He has tried to explain himself to his father's parents, who "kind of understand, but they are upset."

When he called police, he said, he wasn't considering what would happen to his family. "I kind of figured that would fall into place."

What went through his mind?

"I thought: no guts, no glory," he said.

He thought marijuana growing was taking over his father's life. Instead of spending time doing things with the family, his father tended to his plants -- moving the pots around and watering. He said that on two occasions, people visited the house on account of the marijuana.

Living around drugs is "the part that no kid should have to go through, and I didn't want (my younger brother) to go through it."

There were other conflicts. He thought his father paid attention to his sister's accomplishments, while ignoring his own. And he thought his ROTC courses, which were based on Marine Corps leadership training, put him at odds with his ex-Army father "on different military perspectives."

The "stand-up" message from his ROTC course echoed in his head.

"That set it straight, why I should do it," Palmer said. "For one thing, it's illegal."

He said another factor was the emotions stirred by reading "The Red Badge of Courage" for an English class. He said he was impressed by how a character in the book, a soldier named Nick, discovered his own bravery.

"He stood up for what he believed in," Palmer said.


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Government; US: Washington
KEYWORDS: libertarians; wodlist
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To: trussell
Are you capable of posting something without it containing the word "despicable", or calling people by some other demeaning name?

I find your advocacy of family treachery despicable. I will not hold my tongue on that. I have called you no names.

I have called a drug dealer "the scum of the earth", a person you now seem to embrace. I stand by that "name calling".

I hope you slept well, thinking about turning your children over to the authorities to be abused and have their lives ruined, "for their own good".

221 posted on 07/10/2002 8:09:06 AM PDT by Protagoras
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To: trussell
The family should be proud of this boy instead of ridiculing him.

They should shun him for the rest of his life.

222 posted on 07/10/2002 8:13:30 AM PDT by southern rock
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To: Alan Chapman
The "stand-up" message from his ROTC course echoed in his head.

We should have more individuals like this young man in our society.

223 posted on 07/10/2002 8:16:21 AM PDT by Salvation
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To: John O
Addressing a previous poster on the illegal gun thing. According to the constitution there is no such thing as an illegal gun.

And exactly where in the constitution are illegal plants mentioned?

224 posted on 07/10/2002 8:20:46 AM PDT by southern rock
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To: Alan Chapman
Trever Palmer = Fredo Corleone.
225 posted on 07/10/2002 8:21:34 AM PDT by Hemingway's Ghost
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To: RightOnline
What he DIDN'T do, apparently, was to talk to his dad about his concerns about the pot-growing. He didn't say "Look, Dad.........I know this is your house, but it's gotta go or I'll have to do what I really don't want to do." Nope. He decided to skip the interim steps and send Dad directly to Jail; do not pass "Go", do not collect $200.

How do you know what he DIDN'T do? Maybe he did try and talk to dad and dad said, "This is my house, I'll do what I want." No one has any idea what this kid did or didn't do and for how long this has been going on.

226 posted on 07/10/2002 8:26:39 AM PDT by Texas Mom
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To: RightOnline
He didn't say "Look, Dad.........I know this is your house, but it's gotta go or I'll have to do what I really don't want to do."

Or even more appropriate:
He didn't say "Look, Dad.........I know this is your house, but it's gotta go or I'll have to do what I really don't want to do move out."

227 posted on 07/10/2002 8:26:57 AM PDT by southern rock
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To: Salvation
We should have more individuals like this young man in our society.

That's what Lenin and Mao thought too.

228 posted on 07/10/2002 8:32:56 AM PDT by Protagoras
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To: southern rock
Or even more appropriate: He didn't say "Look, Dad.........I know this is your house, but it's gotta go or I'll have to do what I really don't want to do move out." And let the two younger kids deal with it.
229 posted on 07/10/2002 8:35:53 AM PDT by Texas Mom
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To: Texas Mom
How do you know what he DIDN'T do? Maybe he did try and talk to dad and dad said, "This is my house, I'll do what I want." No one has any idea what this kid did or didn't do and for how long this has been going on.

Ratting out a blood relative to the authorities is the lowest thing you can do. Except for sleep with the spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend of a blood relative.

230 posted on 07/10/2002 8:36:10 AM PDT by Hemingway's Ghost
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To: ThomasJefferson
Well, Thomas, I can't say what Jesus would do. I only know that sin has consequences and we ALL end up having to pay those consequences, whether it's jail or whether it's something else.

I know a young man who has been in jail for several years now and he's never been raped.
231 posted on 07/10/2002 8:38:48 AM PDT by Marysecretary
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To: ThomasJefferson
That's what Lenin and Mao thought too.

Oh good grief. The dad isn't being sent to the gas chambers for heavens sake.

You have no idea what this family went through before the phone call, nor do I?

232 posted on 07/10/2002 8:39:05 AM PDT by Texas Mom
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To: Texas Mom
And let the two younger kids deal with it.

The father is the head of the household. It's his house, his rules. It is none of the little snot nosed punk kid's buisness what their father is growing or smoking or selling in HIS home.

233 posted on 07/10/2002 8:42:22 AM PDT by southern rock
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To: Salvation
We should have more individuals like this young man in our society.

Personally, I'd like to see him tarred and feathered and scourned for life.

234 posted on 07/10/2002 8:43:25 AM PDT by southern rock
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To: Hemingway's Ghost; ThomasJefferson; wardaddy; Squantos; harpseal
"911 Operator, can I help you?"

"Uh, hi operator, we had a policeman come to school today with a poster about illegal guns, you know, machine guns and assault rifles and stuff.... and well... my daddy has one of those long black rifles with the handle thing on top. He has it hidden up in the attic of the garage, I saw him put it there last year. And I know how dangerous they are, and I don't want to see him get in trouble, so....

"Don't worry son, we have police units on the way to... help you. You did the right thing."

235 posted on 07/10/2002 8:46:41 AM PDT by Travis McGee
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To: vin-one
I know my theory isn't waterproof. Kids do what they want to do, but the example set before them has so much to do with how they conduct their own lives. One child will grow up not to drink because of his dad and the other will drink because of his dad. That's how life is. But why take the chance? My parents drank too. I have two brothers and a sister who are alcoholics. I married an alcoholic. My siblings live for the next drink. Some life. I'm sure you're a good father and that your children respect you. I don't mean to imply that. But many, many men have abdicated their responsibility to their children and bring them in to bars, get sloppy drunk in front of them, drive when they have the kids in the car with them...been there, seen that.
236 posted on 07/10/2002 8:51:58 AM PDT by Marysecretary
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To: Marysecretary
Well, Thomas, I can't say what Jesus would do.

Clearly

Hint, you can find out in the bible

I only know that sin has consequences and we ALL end up having to pay those consequences, whether it's jail or whether it's something else. <>/I>

Yep, but it's off topic. The topic is turning your family over to the authorities.

I know a young man who has been in jail for several years now and he's never been raped.

I guess it's OK then to turn them over. Because some kid didn't confess to you about his anal rape. Or because he was one of the lucky ones. I guess prison would be good for your kids as long as they don't get raped.

237 posted on 07/10/2002 8:57:44 AM PDT by Protagoras
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To: Travis McGee
until he graduates and joins the Air Force.......Awwww gheeesh !

This guy is dead meat at some point IMHO. Sure wish he'd join the Navy instead. Easier to fall off a ship at sea than to have to depressurize an aircraft at 30 thousand feet, open the door, and convince everyone he "fell"........... yada yada yada.

Stay Safe Travis !

238 posted on 07/10/2002 8:58:44 AM PDT by Squantos
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To: Texas Mom
Oh good grief. The dad isn't being sent to the gas chambers for heavens sake.

I guess it's OK to do what Lenin and Mao wanted, namely that children show alliegence to the state before their families, as long as the family member isn't put in a gas chamber?

BTW, Hilter used gas chambers, not the commie pigs who were just as bad as him.

You have no idea what this family went through before the phone call, nor do I?

The story tells what went on, re-read it. The boy had "issues" with his father.

239 posted on 07/10/2002 9:02:34 AM PDT by Protagoras
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To: Marysecretary
Mary, I have seen it also, in one of my brothers, I know what you are going through, but we can't let a few bad apples spoil the whole bunch.....

Good luck to you, and never give up.
240 posted on 07/10/2002 9:12:27 AM PDT by vin-one
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