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Guy Cars and Chick Cars: Do They Really Exist?
CarTalk ^ | April20, 2002 | Click & Clack, the Tappet Brothers

Posted on 04/20/2002 7:31:08 AM PDT by yankeedame

Hey, gang! Since we had such a hoot with "Worst Cars of the Millenniun" how about having a go at this? And remember: Keep your punches clean and no hitting below the belt. At the sound of the bell come out fighting. **DING** )

Presenting....The Ultimate Chick Cars of all Time

#5 Dodge Neon

Neons are Barbie cars: little and cute and rounded in the hips. Even in black, they are feminine and adorable, only just a bit tougher, like Tattoo Barbie."

#4 VW Jetta

" Anything by Volkswagen is a chick car. VW realized this years ago and joined forces with another company to sell guy cars-- they called that company Porsche."

#3 Mazada Miata

"I discovered this phenomenon when I got a Miata. 'Girlie car'. That all I heard."

#2 VW Cabriolet

"All teen-age girls classify them as cute. 'Nuff said."

#1 VW Beetle

" The VW Beetle. A chick car, definitely. And made to be so. How? I know of no other automoblie with a FLOWER VASE as standard equipment."

Presenting....The Ultimate Guy Cars of All Time

#5 Dodge Viper

"It might be a guy car if there was a movie or TV show built entirely around it. Other examples include Burt Reynold's Trans Am from Smokey and the Bandit, Nash Bridges' Hemi Cuba convertible and Jim Rockford's Firebird."

#4 Ford F-150 Pickup

"Any car with numbers or letters for a name, or tacked on the end, can become a guy car. For example, F-150 or Civic-SI."

#3 Chevy Camero

"...with twice the horse power needed. Used to show other guys how manly you really are."

#2 Chevy Corvette

"I believe the main aspect that determines the male/female state of a car is based on the engine compartment(hood)-to-cab-lenght ratio. A car such as a pickup or Corvette has a large hood-to-cab-lenght ratio."

#1 Ford Mustang

"A back seat guaranteed to be too small for your mother-in-law."


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: cartalk; chickcar; guycars
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To: yankeedame
I don't know about the rest of you male FReepers.
But, I think Chicks who drive standards or Trucks are HOT!
Better Yet....Chicks driving standard Trucks! WHOA!
81 posted on 04/20/2002 10:08:06 AM PDT by gilor
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To: slugbug
White convertible Miata = gay car.

My best friend, who is gay says white convertible Miatas are standard issue when one comes out of the closet, they come with a rainbow sticker and pink triangle already on them ;^)

He drives a VW GTI, however.

Personally, I'd like to have a '57 Thunderbird.

82 posted on 04/20/2002 10:17:42 AM PDT by diotima
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To: SlickWillard
Guess that makes me a "real" man.
83 posted on 04/20/2002 10:22:53 AM PDT by senorita
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To: diotima
Dio's Dream Car:


84 posted on 04/20/2002 10:25:45 AM PDT by diotima
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To: AFVetGal
Too funny! You have me in tears just cracking up.
85 posted on 04/20/2002 10:28:09 AM PDT by senorita
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To: gilor
For all us Standard Truck driving Freeperettes... a big thank you for the "WHOA!"
86 posted on 04/20/2002 10:32:24 AM PDT by senorita
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To: Mr. K
My Guy car is an 1949 Ford Ex-Ohio State Police Car 1956 354 Hemi 30 over bore w/mild cam Dual Edelbrook Carburetors 500 CFM
Crane Electronic Ignition
Chrysler 833 - 4 speed
Engine recessed 4"into Stainless Fire Wall
Hydraulic Clutch
Moon Fuel Block
Front Disc brakes
Full Frame on GM Chassis Lengthened 7"
GM 10 Bolt 3.55 Posi Rear Axle
Vintage Air Conditioner
Doors & Trunk Shaved
Remote Door & Trunk Opener
Chrome Lake Pipes
Dual Exhaust
Original Police Spot Light
Tilt Power Steering Column
American Racing Wheels
Smoked Glass Windows
Halogen Head Lights
AM/FM CD Remote Changer-Sub Woofer
Frenched Power Antenna & Tail Lights
Interior Black Vinyl & Headliner
I would post a picture if someone could explain how to do it here. ride safe

87 posted on 04/20/2002 10:43:50 AM PDT by itsLUCKY2B
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4X4 clean - girl's car
4X4 dirty - guy's car
88 posted on 04/20/2002 10:51:34 AM PDT by Tony in Hawaii
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To: jackbill
Oh, yeah, I forgot about Paul Newman. But Steve McQueen still races sometimes on the Speed Channel in the early morning.
89 posted on 04/20/2002 11:20:41 AM PDT by jimtorr
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To: G.Mason
Sheesh..........I know McQueen is racing the fishes now (his body was cremated and spread over the pacific).......but I still see him race now and again in replays of classic races on the Speed Channel. I never said he was the only star to drive race cars, just one of the few successful ones. What do ya'll have against dead people driving race cars?
90 posted on 04/20/2002 11:28:43 AM PDT by jimtorr
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To: wtc911
You're right about Garner and Newman. Never said McQueen was the only one. By the way, he's actually been dead for 22 years, died in 1980.
91 posted on 04/20/2002 11:30:39 AM PDT by jimtorr
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To: G.Mason
Oop's, my mistake. I guess I did say that he "probably" was the only one.
92 posted on 04/20/2002 11:33:02 AM PDT by jimtorr
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To: mlmr;yankeedame
Subaru outbacks are also big among the ultra leftists in Ithaca, NY.
93 posted on 04/20/2002 11:37:52 AM PDT by Behind Liberal Lines
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To: yankeedame
Chick Car—Grand AM (don't know a single guy who owns one).
94 posted on 04/20/2002 11:53:48 AM PDT by avenir
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To: avenir
What about 01 Preludes: It 's a chick car that thinks it's a guy car.
95 posted on 04/20/2002 12:09:22 PM PDT by jonsie
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To: blau993
As for guy cars, I can't quarrel with most of the posts, but I'll take my Porsche 911 any day.

Can't agree more. By the way 95% of the owners of 911s are male. One of the chicks that I know that owns one (actually she owns two) is the actress that plays Scully on the X-Files.

96 posted on 04/20/2002 1:21:24 PM PDT by rohry
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To: SlickWillard
"You can set my truck on fire, roll it down a hill
But I still wouldn't trade it for a Coupe DeVille
It's got an eight foot bed that never has to be made
You know if it weren't for trucks we wouldn't have tailgates
I met all my wives in traffic jams,
You know there's something women like about a Pickup Man"

--- by Kerry Kurt Phillips/Howard Perdew as performed by Joe Diffie

97 posted on 04/20/2002 1:29:34 PM PDT by Revolting cat!
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To: yankeedame
#4 VW Jetta

THAT IS SO WRONG!!!!!!!!

I Love mine and I am all man BABY!!!!!!!!!LOL!
98 posted on 04/20/2002 1:31:11 PM PDT by cmsgop
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To: slugbug
Mazdas are chick cars. So are VWs and Audis.

Volvos, Subarus and Saabs are for q_eers. Camaros and Vettes are for drivers.

El Caminos are for wife-beaters and natural-born-killers.

99 posted on 04/20/2002 1:34:55 PM PDT by johnny7
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To: yankeedame
Guy Cars and Chick Cars: Do They Really Exist? A little dated but still applicable.

What Your Car Says About You

Acura Integra: I have always wanted to own the Buick of Japanese sport sedans

AMG Hummer: I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole

Buick Park Avenue: I am older than 34 of the 50 states

Cadillac Catera: I learned nothing from the Cimarron

Cadillac Eldorado: I am a pimp

Cadillac Deville: I am a very good Mary Kay Salesperson

Chevrolet Camaro: I enjoy beating up people

Chevrolet Caprice: I enjoy having people slow to 55 mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them

Chevrolet Cavalier coupe: I start 11th grade in the fall

Chevrolet Chevette: I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'vette.

Chevrolet Corvette: I am having a mid-life crisis

Chevrolet El Camino: I am leading a militia to overthrow the government

Chevrolet Tracker: I start 12th grade in the fall

Chrysler Cordoba: I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a Mercedes Benz product.

Datsun 280Z: I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well

Dodge Aspen: I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower

Dodge Neon: I cannot stand the Macarena

Dodge Power Wagon: I am leading a militia to overthrow the government

Ford Crown Victoria: I enjoy having people slow to 55 mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them

Ford Explorer: I will not be caught dead in a minivan

Ford Mustang 5.0: I slow down to 85 in school zones

Ford Mustang 2.3: I avoid Yugos and VW microbuses at the stoplights

Ford Ranchero: I am leading a Militia to overthrow the government

Ford Tempo: I teach fourth grade special education and I voted for Adlai Stevenson

Honda Civic: I just graduated and have no credit at all

Honda Accord: I lack originality and am basically a lemming

Hyundai Accent: I delivered pizza for years in order to get this car

Hyundai Tiburon: I miss the tasteful, conservative and understated styling of the 1974 AMC Matador

Infiniti Q45: I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending

Isuzu I-Mark: I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than the Daihatsu

Jaguar XJS V-12: I am so rich I will pay $60,000.00 for a car that is in the shop 280 days of the year

Kia Sephia: I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu of America

Lexus LS400: I am the lawyer suing the owner of the Infiniti Q45

Lincoln Town Car: I live for bingo and covered supper dishes

Mercury Grand Marquis: I live for bridge and covered supper dishes

Mercedes 600SL: I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph

Mercedes 600SEL: I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole

Mazda Miata: I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler

MGB: I am dating a mechanic

Nissan Altima: I don't know what it means, either

Nissan Maxima: I am still in the closet

Nissan 300ZX: I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings

Oldsmobile Cutlass: I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

Oldsmobile Cutlass Cruiser: I get carsick driving minivans

Oldsmobile Delta 88 Diesel: I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List

Plymouth Neon: I enjoy the Macarena

Pontiac Trans Am: I have a switchblade in my sock

Porsche 928: I am dating big-haired women who would otherwise be inaccessable to me

Range Rover: I do not care about J.D. Powers or his surveys

Rolls Royce Silver Shadow: I think Maggie Thatcher is a touch too Whig for me

Rover 3500: I am married to a mechanic

Saturn SL1: I hope someday to make it to a gathering in Spring Hill

Saturn SL2: I made it to a gathering in Spring Hill

Toyota Camry: I have always wanted to own the Oldsmobile of Japanese family sedans

Volkswagen Beetle: I still watch Partridge Family reruns

Volkswagen Cabriolet: I am out of the closet

Volkswagen Jetta: I enjoy putting out engine fires

Volkswagen Microbus: I am tripping right now

Volkswagen New Beetle: I still watch Partridge Family reruns

Volvo 740 Wagon: I am afraid of my wife

100 posted on 04/20/2002 1:40:15 PM PDT by MosesKnows
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