Posted on 12/06/2001 5:57:08 PM PST by JD86
If you die tomorrow, what does your family need to know today? (Lawyer Needs Freeper Help)
I'm an attorney who helps clients with estate planning and other money matters, but I won't claim that I "know it all". I need Freeper advice.
I once had an elderly client who always told his family "When I die, everything you need is in the manila folder". When he died, we searched high and low but we never did find that folder. As a result, it took years to settle his estate.
That shouldn't happen. I am putting together a booklet for my clients - a checklist of sorts - to help them keep track of important family information.
I'm asking for your suggestions. What would you include in such a checklist?
First - the practical. Doctor's name, where's the will, your desires regarding any minor children ... what else?
Second - the emotional. Would you tell your children you are proud of them? To stop smoking? Dump their lousy mate? What else?
Is there anything you would change about what your parents did? Have you made a checklist yet? If so, what's on it?
Also, if you are incapacitated but don't die, what then?
I have a client who has all her medications listed and taped to the inside of her kitchen cabinet and all her family knows where to find it. Do you have any other ideas like that?
Thanks to all in advance for your suggestions. Please post or send me FreeperMail.
Wow. That's a good one.
Another bump for a thread that's making me rethink a few things :)
I think they were a little surprised at what had sentimental value for each of us.
Where I've taken the latest 35mm film to be developed...
Where I keep the safe deposit box key...
I like that idea. :)
One thing I have found is that people need to write down "I want so and so to have XYZ"- there are a lot of personal things people don't put in their will but are thinking in the back of their head "Hmm when I go I want Jenny to have that opal ring my grandma gave me" and they never tell Jenny about it. I realize that it won't be actionable if it's not in the will or codicil, but still convenient for all family members, even those that get along. An item from Grandma is going to mean more if you knew she wanted you to have it. And it can help stop a fight.
If not in the will, or even additional to the will, there should be a clear specification of every bank account, stock portfolio, retirement/pension fund (including the govt ones, like military or veterans benefits), safe deposit box, storage locker, boat at the marina, cabin in the mountains, burial plot (including deeds in his possession of burial plots for ancestors and other relatives), insurance policies, and other important caches and documents (and keys). A list also of whatever in the house that he didn't own but leased or rented (e.g., my parents didn't own their clothes dryer ... it was leased from the gas company), so it's not sold or given away by mistake.
The will is frequently not read, or at least not read closely, until days after the death. So burial plans (including info on any prepaid funeral plans or burial plots), funeral plans, etc. should be a separate document ... readily available to the nearest family (presumably among the deceased's immediate possessions when he dies); this is a different situation than the will or financial data, as it is uncommon for funeral plans to be fudged by greedy relatives. Any directions for organ donations should be even more immediately available as the organs must be harvested (god how I hate that expression) immediately upon death. Also a list of people to be notified - this list should also be readily accessible, and should include full name, address, phone numbers, and maybe even a notation of how they are connected to the decedent (it might be a non-relative, even a total stranger, having to call family members and tell them about the death, funeral, or inheritance). I also recommend including the address and phone number in bequests in the will, to facilitate things even though those details might change over the years.
It's important to make sure that a number of trustworthy people, and not only relatives, but the lawyer, accountant, etc., know something ... at least where the will and the other documents are to be found. Unfortunately too many people either don't tell someone, or tell one person who turns out to be unavailable (or old/sick/senile) at the time of their death.
Although it might not be part of the legal work, it might be nice if a person contemplating his/her death wrote out or at least taped - while their handwriting was still legible and their minds still lucid - some family history, maybe some details about heirlooms and prized possessions, and some biographical data. Also mark up the photos in the photo album with all the info about who/when/where. When my mother died, I realized that I knew almost zero about her father, nor the birthdates/places of either of her parents or anything about their ancestors, nor whether there were any relatives on her father's side anywhere in the world; and, of course, it is now absolutely impossible to get those answers.
Good luck.
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